Fear And Mayo In Minnesota

Just got back from having a couple of drinks with Jesse Jackson Jr. and a couple of ladies at a local brasserie. Actually, I am grabbing an IV with the Senator and the ladies are really just his nurses. I keep telling anyone who will listen that they should be calling them (the IVs) JRs instead of IVs. Hell, he’s not even Jesse Jackson III. That doesn’t stop me from calling him Trey, which he doesn’t really seem to like. Speaking of Trey, just as I’m typing this, the nurse brings in a tray of Jello. Weird, right? I just told Jesse that if Romney wins he should hit him up for some Staples for his stomach. He didn’t get it.

I guess it must be the meds. We’re getting all kinds of good stuff in here, and they serve it all with little cups of mayonnaise. I honestly never knew that was why they called it Mayo. I thought it was a dude’s name or something. You learn something every day. Mayonnaise still doesn’t agree with me, so I wash the pills off with the sterile urine of some super hot doctor who comes in to check my prostate for no particular reason and then I stick them up my own ass. Happy St. Patrick’s Day!