The Other White Meat

I am cleansing my football palette before the Bears game with an episode of ‘Seinfeld’. It’s the one where Elaine’s boyfriend is a Communist, Jerry wins a foot race and Kramer is a Santa Claus. Ironically, or possibly coincidentally, Jay Cutler is from Santa Claus Indiana. I have been thinking about a nickname for Jay Cutler ever since I talked to Lawrence Holmes form The Score on my DahlCast last week. Lawrence was fun to talk to and I think he might make a good Steve Dahl sportscaster someday. Not that I don’t love Peanut Butter, but presently, they have him working his ass off at CSN, and he’s also on ESPN, so they might have him locked in for radio if I ever decide to go back on. 

That interview and a subsequent L.H. Steve Dahl pre-Blackhawks game shout out on WSCR triggered two of the funniest hate calls I’ve received in quite some time. I’m pretty sure that we talked to Lawrence on Wednesday and the caller got played on Thursday’s DahlCast. You might want to check the logs to be sure. Everything kind of runs together in my brain when it comes to keeping track of show things, if you know what I mean? It’s actually even more difficult doing an hour a day. I will say, however that it seems like the perfect length of time for me to vent and keep my sanity.

Anyway, Lawrence refers to the other Adrian Peterson as “Purple Jesus”, but I think that Bret Favre should be called “Purple Jesus” and Peterson should be called “Purple Rain”. I have decided to call Jay Cutler “Veal”, as in veal cutlet. I could have gone pork too I guess, but certainly not chicken. When he get’s sacked he would be a pounded veal cutlet and when he scores he will be Veal Oscar (pronounced a score). He’s young, got boxed-in in CO and he milk-fed. He’s Veal Cutler. Niklas Hjalmarsson on the Blackhawks was called “The Hammer” but now they call him Homer. That’s a nickname downgrade. Maybe Jay would feel the same way about his.