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| 2:01
| Steve's got the big show coming up but he doesn't know what it's going to be about. He's got a few minutes to figure that out though. |
| 2:02
| Actually he really doesn't, his show is starting right now. |
| 2:03
| Stan was wondering if Steve took his boat out of the water yet. Steve doesn't really do that, he just got a guy who takes care of his boat. |
| 2:04
| The arrangement is perfect, the guy takes care of the boat like it's his but Steve gets to use it. The guy takes care of everything and tells Steve what he needs to do. He's sort of like Stan in a way. |
| 2:05
| If you have a boat on Lake Michigan you don't want to take it out everyday because the conditions aren't always great. The other problem with having a boat is that you have to get it ready. |
| 2:06
| A lot of times the boat isn't ready and Steve would blame that on his sons. They sort of view it as a rental boat so bring it back empty, maybe some beer cans or a dead body and a sea creature they ran over with the propeller. |
| 2:07
| It usually takes so long to get the boat ready to use that you're tired and don't really feel like going out. |
| 2:08
| This guy is also going to winterize the boat for Steve which as it turns out just involves taking it out of the water and putting shrink-wrap on it. Steve assumed they were constantly checking on the boat throughout the winter, putting antifreeze in, maybe coating the hull with something. |
| 2:09
| Stan would be afraid to sleep on his boat because you wouldn't be able to hear someone sneaking onboard. |
| 2:10
| It seems like professional pirates probably don't care about boaters on Lake Michigan, unless you have a hundred kilos of cocaine onboard. |
| 2:11
| It seems like you could just turn the anchor light on and you'd be fine. Of course Stan would be worried knowing the battery is being drained by the light. |
| 2:12
| Stan just thinks that boating on the lake would be rife with thuggery and accidents. |
| 2:13
| Stan thought everyone who had a boat had a gun onboard. Maybe a flare gun but that's about it. And a fire extinguisher of course. |
| 2:14
| Stan really should get into boating because he loves fire extinguishers. He used to have one mounted inside his car. He still does now but it's not visible. |
| 2:19
| Live read: Medical Hair Restoration |
| 2:20
| It's Buzz Kilman everyone, follicly-challenged radio pitchman. He's getting a transplant tomorrow. Is that heart or kidney, because of the stones and all. |
| 2:21
| Buzz decided to add a "high-hive me" tag to the end of his live read. Is he getting free-range hair? |
| 2:22
| Buzz would like to take this opportunity to thank the transplant community in Chicago, he's been flooded with encouraging emails, some from local celebrities that he can't name. Is that why he's wearing the hair ribbon? |
| 2:23
| Buzz has no problem admitting that he's getting a transplant and not just because he's getting free hair. It is hard to say no to free hair. Steve would take free hair and he doesn't even need it. Maybe they could fill in his back or something. |
| 2:24
| If Buzz wanted to do it anonymously and pay for it himself there's no way that Steve or Mary wouldn't notice. Then it would end up on the air anyway so he might as well just put it out there. |
| 2:25
| Buzz won't be able to wear his normal headphones next week because he can't have anything on his head. Will he have to sleep in one of those halos they use for people who break their necks? Or how about one of those paper cones they put around dog's necks. |
| 2:26
| We did get Buzz some new headphones which he might want to practice on today. It's hard for Steve to get used to new headphones. If he goes on someone else's show he brings his own pair. |
| 2:27
| Buzz has to wear the other headphones for a week although Steve feels he'll get used to them and keep them permanently. |
| 2:28
| Buzz doesn't think that'll happen because he likes the classic headphone look. He remembers how thrilled he was as a kid the first time someone gave him a pair of headphones. And now he gets paid to wear them. |
| 2:29
| Live read: The Little Guys |
| 2:30
| Steve gets a lot of email from Jim Nayder, who he likes but is never coming on the show again. It's a pain to get Jim set up and then he plays the same stuff every time. |
| 2:31
| Here's what kills Jim Nayder, Wendy's not here. When she was here Jim was not the most irritating person in the room. |
| 2:32
| Steve really doesn't need to hear that little kid singing Somewhere Over the Rainbow or some bad marching band. |
| 2:33
| Jim does a lot of bait-and-switch too. He says he's coming in for Halloween but then has a bunch of songs about how scary the bird flu is. This isn't NPR! |
| 2:34
| Jim is mopey too and his equipment is bad and doesn't work right. He won't just give Steve a CD to play either because he's a control freak. |
| 2:35
| It's funnier when he's on TV anyway because of his mopey look. Plus it's only 6 minutes, you're in, you're out. Here though it gets complicated. |
| 2:36
| Jim did send an old ad from Popular Mechanics which is pretty funny though. It looks like it's from the 50's or 60's. It's for a hat that you wear for 10 minutes a day and it helps you grow more hair. |
| 2:37
| The hat sort of looks like a lampshade or maybe a metal fez. Steve is surprised there were bald people in the 50s with this kind of device. |
| 2:38
| This ad is actually from 1924. So it seems as if there would be no baldness at all on the entire planet. |
| 2:39
| This guy sounds like the Kevin Trudeau of the 1920s. In 1924 they probably didn't have anyone regulating this kind of stuff. |
| 2:40
| Buzz remembers one of his dad's friends being really bald and always trying out various cures. Occasionally he'd get really excited about one method and then become convinced you could see new hair coming in. |
| 2:47
| We look forward to seeing Buzz on Monday with his new hair. |
| 2:48
| Buzz will actually have his head covered all week for the recovering process. So he'll have a bandage on? Like it's a Halloween costume? That'll look great. |
| 2:49
| Buzz was thinking more like a hat but he can't wear headphones. He could wear his bluesman fedora, or he could go Larry Lujack and wear a cowboy hat. |
| 2:50
| Don Imus actually stole the cowboy hat from Larry Lujack. Steve would imagine that this time in his life Larry is wearing the scarves to hide the turkey neck. |
| 2:51
| Steve had hoped that after Brokeback Mountain they both would have rethought the cowboy look. Steve hasn't seen Larry Lujack in a while. Every few years he pops up and gives an interview on channel 11 about how much he hated it in Chicago. |
| 2:52
| Then they ask him how things are going in New Mexico and he says he's miserable there too. He's miserable everywhere. He always said he wanted to retire and become a forest ranger but he's still on the radio somewhere. |
| 2:53
| Steve would like to see Larry Lujack appear on Check Please! instead of in an interview. He wouldn't have a restaurant to recommend and he wouldn't like anyone else's choice. It's just a different way to present it. |
| 2:54
| It's sort of insulting for him to come on in Chicago and say how much he hated it here. He made a lot of money in this city. |
| 2:55
| Song: All I Wanna Do, Sheryl Crow |
| 2:58
| That song came out of a jam session with Sheryl Crow and some other musicians. They used to get together at a studio that Steve worked at when he was younger. |
| 2:59
| The first time Buzz heard that song he was in a record store in Coconut Grove, Florida on vacation. Steve has no idea what he was doing. It was right around '93 or '94, he's not going to remember a lot. Just a reminder, he quit drinking in '95. |
| 3:00
| '93 and '94 were kind of lost years which is why he quit in '95. If those weren't really bad years he probably wouldn't have quit in '95. |
| 3:05
| Even Bob Sirott was offended when Larry Lujack said he hated Chicago. Buzz is reoffended just hearing the audio. He says there are too many cars in the city. What does he expect? It's a big city! |
| 3:06
| Steve has been to Santa Fe, it's a big city and there are a lot of cars. Other than that there's not much going on. Steve's been there, he checked out the Georgia O'Keefe museum, went to the Cowgirl bar and that's about it. |
| 3:07
| Live read: One More Round |
| 3:08
| This One More Round clothing is available at The Rail at Nordstrom's. Is that some sort of skateboarding store? Steve might have to check it out, it could be a good look for him. |
| 3:09
| Buzz doesn't know about that look for Steve. Is Buzz saying that because he's jealous Steve stole his look today? He's got the polo shirt on, sleeves rolled up. Plus he's got a full head of hair and a pretty nice beard if he could say so. |
| 3:10
| Steve's really got shaving down to a once-a-week thing. He shaves when it starts itching. |
| 3:11
| Steve just got this email from Jim Nayder, thanking him for his kind words. He's troubled that Steve thinks it's too complicated having him on. |
| 3:12
| Steve doesn't think that, he knows it. Jim wants one more chance though, on Halloween. He will bring no equipment, even though he just got some new Remco gear. |
| 3:13
| Jim will bring in one CD for Steve to control and he swears to Yanni that all the songs will be about or relating to Halloween. Jim realizes this will be very hard for him to do but he wants to because he misses Buzz. |
| 3:14
| Alright, Jim can come in on Halloween but it has to be Halloween music. At some point Steve wants to hear Bobby "Boris" Pickett, even though The Monster Mash is a fairly common song. Maybe Steve should do a remake of that song. It's hard to improve on a classic though. |
| 3:15
| The song could be done by someone else, like Aerosmith, but Steve just wants to hear it. He doesn't really want to play it himself either. He's outsourcing the weird music to Jim. |
| 3:16
| Jim did not address his mopey behavior though. He'll have to stop at Starbuck's and get a double espresso before he comes in because otherwise he's a real downer. He just comes in and sucks all the energy out of the room. He's like a black hole. |
| 3:17
| Apparently The Rail is a department in Nordstrom with groovy clothing. Steve's guessing they don't have items for the big and tall gentleman. They do have 2X juniors. Would that be inappropriate for Steve to wear? |
| 3:18
| Caller Joe wanted to let Steve know that last Halloween on Jimmy Kimmel Live Bobby Brown and Mike Tyson, in costume, performed The Monster Mash. Steve sort of remembers that. |
| 3:19
| The Rail does have 2X sizes on their website but when you try to select them you can't. They probably don't have the bigger sizes. This is clothing for hipsters like Billy Dec. |
| 3:20
| Buzz thought the caller's name was Al. It's Joe but you can call him Al. Al/Joe won a gift certificate for Shaw's, where Buzz is a regular. You can't get him out of the place, he's a fixture. |
| 3:25
| Live read: Medical Hair Restoration |
| 3:26
| Buzz is getting free range hair from the pristine wilderness of British Columbia in the transplant. |
| 3:27
| To prepare for the procedure Buzz has to drink decaf coffee today. That's why he has the Starbuck's today. He can't have any caffeine. |
| 3:28
| Buzz also couldn't go running today or workout. That sounds perfect for Steve but he'd need the caffeine. |
| 3:29
| Buzz actually has a decaf cappuccino. Nothing makes Steve madder than finding out he's drinking decaf. He doesn't really like coffee he just drinks it for the reward of getting whacked off it. |
| 3:30
| Buzz started drinking coffee constantly when he quit smoking. He obviously likes the caffeine too because he's missing it right now. |
| 3:31
| Sometimes decaf is made at Steve's house for guests and no one tells him. Then three cups in he finds out. Why are they making decaf for guests? If they don't want regular coffee then how about a nice cup of water? |
| 3:32
| Steve's "get crazy" drink these days is sugar-free Red Bull. He'll be having a few at the Bears game on Sunday, that's how he rolls. Steve's not sure if he'll be wearing orange though. |
| 3:33
| Buzz said yesterday that Steve doesn't look good in orange. Steve blogged about it today. He should probably just read the blog since he can't say it any more succinctly. |
| 3:34
| The Bears are wearing orange uniforms on Sunday and they want the fans to wear orange as well. It's weird that Ed chose a photo of Kyle Orton in an orange jersey for the blog today though. Buzz thinks he's the future QB of the Bears. |
| 3:35
| Steve's not opposed to that, he thinks Kyle is very talented. He's pretty happy with Brian Griese though. Buzz read the negative article about Griese that Greg Couch wrote yesterday. |
| 3:36
| Couch said that many people have been glad to have Griese on their team and just as many have been glad when he leaves. Apparently he tends to alienate some players. Like when he says he called all the plays on the last drive of the game? |
| 3:37
| Yesterday Buzz said Steve didn't look good in orange but maybe Buzz is trying to save that color for himself. He does own a pumpkin suit after all. |
| 3:38
| Why does Buzz own a pumpkin suit anyway? And how big is his house that he has all this stuff? He's got the 10 foot by 10 foot velvet Elvis, the pumpkin suit and a bunny suit too. |
| 3:39
| Buzz has trouble throwing stuff out. He and Tina would be a nightmare couple for many reasons but mainly because he can't throw out physical stuff and she can't throw out food. |
| 3:40
| Today someone sent in 3 chicken wings and a PBR to promote some new bar. The grease from the wings had already stained most of the box so they'd probably been in there for a while. She didn't want to throw them out either, she wanted to put the rancid wings and warm beer in the WBBM kitchen. |
| 3:41
| A couple of weeks ago Dinkel's sent along some pastries for their anniversary. Steve opened the box and there was half a bearclaw in there. Steve took a bite of it anyway but it was Tina who took the other half. |
| 3:42
| In an office setting you can't do that, you just have to take the whole thing. We're not a family up there. Steve doesn't really even want to see that at home. |
| 3:43
| Tina cut the bearclaw in half but that would still involve touching it. You'd like to think she only touched her half but she had to get it back into the box. And there was no stab wound in the other half. Steve calculated the best place to take a bite from that she probably didn't touch and then threw the rest out. |
| 3:44
| On the phone is Luke Stuckmeyer from Comcast Sportsnet. Luke thought about Steve was he was coming in to work today because he had some trouble getting off the elevator in the parking garage. |
| 3:45
| That happened to Steve a couple of weeks ago. There's only one elevator from the parking garage because the other one is being worked on. Although lately it seems like they've stopped working on the other one altogether. |
| 3:46
| This is going to sound stupid but did Boston win last night? They won 2-1 and now the series heads to Colorado. It seems like they're going to win the whole thing but you never know. |
| 3:47
| Everyone gets a free taco now because someone stole a base last night. That's a free taco for everyone in the country. |
| 3:48
| It's a genius promotion really because when you get into Taco Bell you won't just be able to get one. |
| 3:49
| Steve could eat a minimum of three tacos when he goes into Taco Bell. |
| 3:50
| Steve didn't see the game last night, did someone steal the base just so everyone in America could get a free taco? Was it a gratuitous steal? |
| 3:51
| Is Pete not hooked up properly today because Steve has asked him two questions and he hasn't answered. |
| 3:52
| Pete saw the game and it wasn't gratuitous but it was uncontested. Someone on the Rex Sox stole a base and the guy on the Rockies probably didn't even want to throw the ball because then everyone gets a taco. |
| 3:53
| So the Red Sox won last night. Steve sort of did know that he just forgot. Steve can't really get into the World Series since it's almost November. |
| 3:54
| The renovation of Wrigley Field continues today. Yesterday a bulldozer came to a dead stop after hitting something. Turns out it was the concrete foundation and part of the goal post from when the Bears played there. |
| 3:55
| The Bulls had their last preseason game last night and it didn't go well. They won but Joakim Noah, Ben Wallace and Tyrus Thomas were all injured. |
| 3:56
| The Hawks lost last night. They had won 4 out of 5 but now they've lost 2 in a row. |
| 3:57
| And of course we've got the Bears/Lions game on Sunday. The trash talking is really ramping up. |
| 3:58
| First we had Tommie Harris saying "the Lions don't come in and win in our house." That doesn't really seem like trash talking. What else would he say? |
| 3:59
| Then of course Roy Williams had something to say but it wasn't that bad either. He just said Tommie Harris needs to back that up. He did say that Peanut Tillman was not one of the top three corners in the league. |
| 4:00
| Vasher should be back after the bye week but he won't play on Sunday. Darwin Walker should play though. |
| 4:01
| Luke seems to be lacking his fast food knowledge. He's probably in his downtown phase though. |
| 4:08
| Buzz had to clear his throat which gave Steve the urge to do the same. Buzz cleared off-air which Steve always appreciates. |
| 4:09
| Live read: WCIU |
| 4:10
| Steve's a little distracted with this live read. He's trying to figure out how they resolved the pregnancy plotline on King of Queens. They don't have a kid so it seems like something bad is lurking. Was there a miscarriage? Did she terminate the pregnancy? Did she have the kid and then sell it? |
| 4:11
| Headlines with Buzz |
| 4:12
| A change in the weather has made firefighting a little easier in Southern California. The cooler temperatures have made it physically easier for the firefighters but the fires also seem easier to contain. |
| 4:13
| The border patrol has found 4 charred bodies in the mountains near the Mexico border. So they picked the worst day to come into the country. |
| 4:14
| A joint Homeland Security/FBI memo is once again warning about explosives hidden in people's shoes. Did we think it was no longer possible to hide explosives in shoes? Did we forget about Richard Reid? |
| 4:15
| Steve never forgot about him. He remembers every time he flies and has to take his shoes off. |
| 4:16
| Steve's just going to go barefoot at the airport like Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies. |
| 4:17
| By a vote of 4-3 the Georgia Supreme Court has ordered the release of Genarlow Wilson. He was serving 10 years for having consensual oral sex with a 15-year old when he was 17. This story has been on Buzz's might for a while so it's good to finally get it over. |
| 4:18
| Bill Clinton seemed to relish an exchange he had in Minnesota last night with a heckler claiming 9/11 was a fraud. Are these the same people who always email Buzz? |
| 4:19
| They were trying to get to Steve but he wasn't biting. It all seemed pretty real to Steve and if it wasn't he doesn't really want to deal with that either. |
| 4:20
| The votes are in and the Star Wars character that American's most want to see on a postage stamp is Yoda. |
| 4:21
| George Ryan has lost his appeal and could report to jail as soon as two weeks. Former governor Walkin' Dan Walker, who's now uses a walker said the prison Ryan is going to, where he also spent some time is a "hell-hole." |
| 4:22
| Caller Pam is a flight attendant for American Airlines. They had a situation a week ago when a passenger came on with no shoes. He said he didn't own shoes, he didn't like them and he was coming to America without shoes. |
| 4:23
| They almost denied him boarding but he was able to borrow a pair from a fellow passenger. Who would lend a stranger their shoes? |
| 4:24
| Glenview public schools have banned candy for Halloween, instead suggesting fruit or vegetable snacks. What the hell is going on? This has to be because of working mom's guilt. |
| 4:25
| It doesn't seem like a good time to be a kid, especially in Glenview. They do have the sweet games and the internet though. |
| 4:30
| Live read: The Little Guys |
| 4:31
| Dateline London. Robert Stewart was discovered in his room at the Abberly House Hostel in Scotland last year, naked, holding a bike up and thrusting his hips into it. |
| 4:32
| Stewart has been placed on the sex offenders' register which seems wrong to Buzz. Are there any perversions that Buzz actually thinks are perversions? If not he better rein in his behavior and stop doing whatever it is he's doing to that water fountain. |
| 4:33
| He is not the first man convicted of sexual offense involving an inanimate object. In 1993 Karl Watkins was jailed for having sex with pavements in Reddicth, Worcs. |
| 4:34
| Buzz can see how that one would be a problem since it's probably outdoors. But if he's in his own room it seems private. Unless the people who busted in on him were sharing the room with him. Steve doesn't really know how hostels work. |
| 4:35
| Song: Margaritaville, Jimmy Buffett |
| 4:39
| Live read: The Admiral |
| 4:46
| In the first World Series game Fox had Royce Clayton mic'ed up and he was talking to Coco Crisp about the free tacos at Taco Bell. |
| 4:47
| Then last night they played more audio of Royce Clayton talking to Jacoby Ellsbury about stealing a base for a taco from the first game. He was the one who stole the base last night. Is Royce Clayton working for Taco Bell or something? |
| 4:48
| Steve couldn't care less about this World Series. The Red Sox won 3 years ago and the Rockies have been around for about 2 years. Buzz watched it last night accidentally, he didn't even know who the Rockies were. |
| 4:49
| Steve's irritated by the Red Sox fans too. He can only take so many shots of one of their fans praying for the outcome of a game. That's their stock Red Sox fan footage. |
| 4:50
| Pete kept saying he wouldn't watch the World Series but he has so far. Steve hasn't watching a single inning. He doesn't like that Green Monster at Fenway either. If he wanted to watch people playing balls off a wall he'd watch handball. |
| 4:51
| Steve's a baseball traditionalist but he doesn't mind the DH and he hates the Green Monster. |
| 4:52
| That stadium is a dump too. It's fine to walk-through but otherwise it makes Wrigley Field look like a palace. |
| 4:53
| So it'll be Taco Tuesday all across the country next Tuesday. We'll have to send both Tina and Stephanie to each get a free taco for Steve and Buzz. |
| 4:54
| Taco Bell isn't going to lose money on this either because you can't just go there and order one taco. Some people might abuse the promotion but Steve won't be one of them. |
| 4:55
| Live read: Medical Hair Restoration |
| 4:56
| Bright and early tomorrow Buzz will be heading out to get his procedure done. He'll probably be up at 5:30 because the clinic is out in the suburbs. He'll come home with a full head of hair though! |
| 4:57
| Buzz isn't going Wayne Cochran or Elvis Presley, he's just taking care of the pattern in male pattern baldness. |
| 4:58
| For some reason Steve can see Buzz showing up like Wayne Cochran, even after all his protestation. |
| 4:59
| Buzz only told Aimee once that he should get some hair up there but he has periodically thrown it back at her and she backed it up. |
| 5:00
| That was a year and a half ago though so it took Buzz a while to finally make the decision. It was only after he saw the results of his brother-in-laws procedure that he decided to do it. |
| 5:01
| It's time for the Five O'Clock Taco Bell. This taco has been sitting in front of Steve for 15 minutes driving him nuts. |
| 5:02
| Steve's having the original hard shell which is the same taco all of America will be getting for free next Tuesday. |
| 5:08
| On the phone is the voice of the Bears, Jeff Joniak. That was pretty exciting in the last 2 minutes of that game. |
| 5:09
| Jeff saw Brian Griese at Halas Hall this week and he said he enjoyed his touchdown call. Then he asked Jeff if he thought they'd do it and he had to say no. 2 minutes, no time-outs and 97 yards. It didn't seem possible. Did Griese punch Jeff then? |
| 5:10
| Jay Hilgenberg said it might be the greatest drive in Bears history. It was pretty exciting. Steve kept waiting for something bad to happen but it didn't. Even that bad snap ended up alright. |
| 5:11
| Jeff had never heard of that false start rule. It seems like only offensive linemen and Ed Hochuli know about it. |
| 5:12
| Jeff watched the drive again and it was pretty amazing. They even worked the middle of the field which is something you don't normally do in that situation. |
| 5:13
| Sunday we've got he Lions coming to town. Steve says "we" as a Bears fan. If they're going to tell him to wear orange then he can say we. Steve's not sure if he's wearing orange though. He'd feel like a dope if he showed up wearing what he was told to wear. |
| 5:14
| Jeff's going to try to wear something orange. His TV make-up is just a shade under orange so that's close. |
| 5:15
| It seems pointless to predict things at this point. The great news is if they had lost that game in Philly Sunday would be meaningless. Instead it's a huge game. They've got 8 games left plus the bye week. This is the best time to get a bye week too, right in the middle. |
| 5:16
| It's also a good time for the bye because they have two West Coast road trips coming up after that. |
| 5:17
| A lot of guys didn't play in that Lions game in Detroit but they're all playing on Sunday. That Rod Marinelli guy reminds Steve of Cotton on King of the Hill. |
| 5:18
| Nathan Vasher practiced for the first time in weeks. There's a very slim chance he'll play on Sunday but they'll probably hold him out until after the bye week. |
| 5:19
| Does Tom where orange when he's told to? Because Steve does what Tom does. WWTD? |
| 5:20
| Jeff's feeling is that Tom will have some sort of orange on. Will Jeff call Steve at home just so he knows for sure? |
| 5:21
| Steve does have an orange Kordell Stewart jersey he could wear. It was given to him as a joke. The Bears have won their last two games in the orange jerseys. |
| 5:22
| Steve would like to think that the color of your jersey doesn't matter. Mark Anderson says it makes him move faster. If he's going to sack John Kitna 4 times that's OK. |
| 5:23
| Steve's going to the game on Sunday but in the future he has to figure out a way to get that Delay Play hooked up. He can't take any more Brian Baldinger. |
| 5:29
| If Steve were an athlete he'd give reporters short answers like Urlacher is doing. That way they'll stop talking to you. Because they never take what you say and use it for good. |
| 5:30
| Steve's TiVo in the studio is only in one channel, why is that? Steve could make it two channels but he doesn't want to. He'd rather just complain about it. People listening at home on a mono radio won't even know the difference though. |
| 5:31
| Live read: Big Bowl |
| 5:32
| Steve was going to do sports but then it occurred to him that we just talked to Jeff Joniak. Maybe he should wait then? |
| 5:33
| Buzz says go ahead since we only talked to Jeff about football. Nate Vasher returned to practice this week after injuring his groin against the Cowboys. That sort of sounds like a Brokeback Mountain situation. |
| 5:34
| Brendan's in the studio, what's he doing here? There's a small audio problem. Brendan forgot to denote where the first piece of audio went in the copy. Steve feels like he's on acid right now. |
| 5:35
| If Brendan hadn't told him then everything would be off. Buzz enjoys these official visits from Brendan. It's all business with him. |
| 5:36
| Peanut Tillman responded to Roy Williams quote that he wasn't one of the top three corners in the league saying maybe he was one of the top four. |
| 5:37
| Tommie Harris is on a mission to end gun violence. He's encouraging people who live in neighborhoods with a lot of gun violence to email his foundation and tell him what they need. |
| 5:38
| That's a pretty good idea. It's like when they give poor people a frozen turkey for Thanksgiving. That's not really what they need is it? A lot of work and energy goes into making that turkey into something edible. They're better off giving them a canned ham. |
| 5:39
| A frozen turkey is about the most inconvenient thing you can give a poor person. |
| 5:40
| The White Sox have removed Ryan Bukvich from their 40-man roster. Good! He started to get better at the end of the season when there was nothing to lose. That's the definition of a loser. |
| 5:41
| New Cincinnati Reds manager Dusty Baker said he has spoken to Mark Prior and Kerry Wood this off-season. The Reds are pitching-starved and both pitchers could become free agents. |
| 5:42
| It doesn't seem right for Kerry Wood to leave the Cubs like that after all they've done for him. And Steve still has a porcelain figurine from Just Ducky 2 that Mark Prior needs to sign. |
| 5:43
| Boston leads the World Series 2-0 after last night's 2-1 victory over the Rockies at Fenway Park. |
| 5:44
| Barack Obama, in Boston yesterday, refused to become a Red Sox supporter. He told a crowd that they don't want someone who pretends to be a Red Sox fan as their president. Pretty good way to play it. |
| 5:45
| A Colorado Rockies fan is offering his 25-year collection of Playboys (creepy!) in exchange for two World Series tickets. Can't people just buy the tickets on StubHub or something? |
| 5:46
| Caller Dwayne is a longtime listener. It seems like a longtime, it's only been since 2:00. |
| 5:47
| Dwayne knows what a pain it is to deal with frozen turkeys. He's been cooking them every year for the Masonic temple he belongs to. |
| 5:48
| Dwayne's lodge is at 42nd and Cottage Grove. Steve's been saying for years that he and Buzz should join the Masons, maybe this is just the place for them. |
| 5:49
| It only dawned on Steve recently that frozen turkeys is the worst thing you can give someone who's hungry and poor. |
| 5:50
| Does Steve get a fez or a robe or something like that? The fez is for the shriners and the robe is a different house of the Masons. |
| 5:51
| Does Steve get anything? Can he at least get one of those special Masons license plates? Or maybe a money clip with the pyramid and the eye on it? |
| 5:52
| What's the parking situation down at the lodge? Is it a secure, well-lit parking lot? Are the other guys in Dwayne's lodge going to be OK with Steve joining up? |
| 5:58
| Caller Dave has been listening for longer than that guy in Denver has been collecting Playboys. |
| 5:59
| Dave says Playboys are barely worth the paper they're printed on. Buzz thought they were worth a fortune but he still has a picture of the Collins Twins stashed beneath his mattress. |
| 6:00
| Dave's dad had a collection going back to the second year it was printed but unfortunately he doesn't have the first year. That would be worth a small fortune. Dave priced some of his own issues out and they're only worth a few bucks each. |
| 6:01
| Steve would buy the Sex in the Cinema issue with Carol Lynley, sub-teen soda-sipper. Dave could probably send that to him. That's hot! |
| 6:02
| Steve doesn't really want the issue, it seems creepy for Dave to send it to him. It's also creepy that Steve said it was hot. That's borderline gay. That |
| 6:09
| Steve's looking at something that says the March 1965 issue of Playboy with Carol Lynley is worth $24. So maybe that guy needs to do some new research. Or maybe his issues have been sullied in some way. |
| 6:10
| Live read: Townstone Financial |
| 6:11
| Song: You Learn, Alanis Morissette |
| 6:16
| By now she probably knows what ironic means. Because a lot of that stuff in the other song wasn't ironic, it was just coincidence or bad luck. |
| 6:17
| Steve likes Alanis Morissette even though he's not a teenage girl. He liked her better when she was crazy. Then she got all centered and hippyish. |
| 6:23
| Alanis Morissette was on Curb Your Enthusiasm a few seasons ago. It was really funny on Sunday though because Larry's wife left him, as she did in real life. |
| 6:24
| She was supposedly involved with the gardener. Buzz says that and it always freaks Steve out because he doesn't know where he read it. She was spotted around Martha's Vineyard with a landscape architect. That's all we know. |
| 6:25
| Steve's favorite thing about Larry David's wife is that she does all this stuff for the environment but flies around in a Learjet. Actually it's probably a Gulfstream but that's no better for the environment. |
| 6:26
| You have to bend over in the Learjet so Buzz would probably go with the Gulfstream, just for his back. Of course when you're at your seat you don't have to worry about it. |
| 6:27
| Live read: Medical Hair Restoration |
| 6:28
| If Buzz could get his hair transplant traded-out Steve would like to put him to work on getting a jet. He might have finally found his niche. Even if it's just a fractional share of a jet. They'll need a jet to get to live remotes, as long as they're within fuel range. You don't want to be involved in refueling, it makes you look stupid. Even if it's just a Citation, that would be fine. Because Steve's been trying to 10 years with no success. |
| 6:35
| Steve just showed Buzz a Lear60XR and he's on the case. They might not even have to bend down while they're on it. |
| 6:36
| So far no one has called in with offers. Occasionally this guy emails Steve who's a jet pilot but he can't really offer Steve anything. It seems more like just rubbing it in. |
| 6:37
| The fuel range is 2,500 miles so they can go to Florida and do their clowning missionary work. Plus it can go above 50,000 so you get away from all the riff-raff. |
| 6:38
| Steve is going to keep working at this and he's going to get it the old fashioned way. He's not going to jeopardizes anyone's retirement for a jet. |
| 6:39
| But Buzz is on this after the hair transplant right? Because they're a local rep for Learjet who's always trying to meet with Steve. |
| 6:40
| Steve tells him it would be a waste of time because he doesn't have the money to buy a jet. |
| 6:41
| Headlines with Buzz |
| 6:42
| The man who was sentenced to 10 years for having consensual oral sex with a 15-year old girl while he was 17 has been released from jail. |
| 6:43
| The Georgia Supreme Court ruled that his sentence was cruel and unusual punishment and grossly disproportionate for the crime. |
| 6:44
| Thanks for the in-depth report on that. Can we get that off Buzz's psychological plate now? Mr. Friend of the Pervert. |
| 6:45
| FEMA has admitted to posing several of it's own employees as reporters at a press conference in Southern California about the wildfires. |
| 6:46
| Steve still can't believe they kicked all those people out of QualComm. If you're a season ticket holder can you stay until the game? |
| 6:47
| Buzz's news says "blazing wildfires" but they're just wildfires. He reads whatever is in front of him, which is disappointing. He's like Ron Burgundy. |
| 6:48
| Bill Clinton told a group of hecklers in Minnesota that they're going to give they're state a bad name. The hecklers began yelling at Clinton and saying 9/11 was a fraud. |
| 6:49
| Clinton sort of took a page from the Howard Stern book and yelled "how dare you" at the hecklers. There's really nothing you can do at that point. How do you respond to that? |
| 6:50
| A jury today convicted Jeanette Sliwinski of three counts of reckless homicide and one count of aggravated battery, NBC5 reported. |
| 6:51
| Doesn't everyone know that story? Or is Buzz just giving a shout-out to Larry Wert? |
| 6:52
| Three boxers in town for the AIBA are missing. Police do not believe foul play is involved and do not consider the boxers missing persons. |
| 6:53
| There's speculation that they don't want to go home and are trying to stay in the U.S. That's not gong to help us get the Olympics. |
| 7:00
| Steve smells the fryer which means it's Fry Daddy Friday. Matt can't say what he's frying up but it's gross. It's a good gross though. |
| 7:01
| Would it kill Matt to fry up a corn dog or funnel cake? They did fry up some bacon-wrapped hot dogs which were pretty good. They've never tried funnel cakes though,they try to go for the nontraditional stuff. |