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| 5:32
| Good mornings everybody, it's the Steve Dahl Show. Steve's not sure where that music comes from but it's not in here. |
| 5:33
| It's a gift, what's there to question? Steve likes it, he just doesn't know where it comes from. He just turns on his mic and starts talking. |
| 5:34
| We might need to put an intro together because that was lackluster. Steve's also a bit confused because he's being told there was another song playing. Was it aborted? |
| 5:35
| That Todd Cavanah guy is out here today. Well not out here, Steve doesn't know what that means since he's not broadcasting outside. Todd's out there, in the hall, that's what Steve means. Is he wearing anything unusual? |
| 5:36
| Todd looks like he's getting ready to pose for a J. Crew ad. He likes hip-hop, he likes classic rock and he has a place in Montana. As far as Steve can tell the only thing he was doing was getting Mary's phone number. |
| 5:37
| Steve aborted Sweet Emotion, apologies. You can't hear that song enough. Take you back stage, you can drink from my glass. |
| 5:38
| Every time Steve hears that song he's reminded of what complete idiots Aerosmith are. Steve's going to underline and bold that one. And yet, their songs are pretty complex. |
| 5:39
| Steve came across a fire on his way in this morning. He heard about it on WBBM and then saw it from the road. If Steve looks disheveled it's because he was upstairs making out with Felicia Middlebrooks before the show. |
| 5:40
| Between her and the Indian girl at the Dunkin' Donuts Steve's got a lot going on in the morning. Steve didn't stop there yesterday because there were too many people in line. By too many he means one. |
| 5:41
| Today Steve went in and felt a special connection with the girl behind the counter as he tried to make a decision from the thousands of choices. What happened to coffee and a donut? There's so many flavors of coffee, so many different donuts and bagels, breakfast sandwiches and you can get your car detailed. |
| 5:42
| Steve's coffee is still not cool enough to drink for at least a half hour. Tomorrow she'll learn that Steve likes ice cubes in his coffee to cool it down. |
| 5:43
| Steve also got a buttermilk donut which has no hole in it. Steve reached into his bag and it was just a clump. Steve likes to finger his donut but there was no hole. He almost bored his own hole. |
| 5:44
| Buzz has never seen a donut with no hole in it that doesn't have a some sort of filling. Welcome to the topsy-turvy world of mornings! |
| 5:45
| The fire was at 22nd and Wabash which is right where the Stevenson ends so Steve was able to see the whole thing. Plus it smelled like fall and someone was having a fire in their house. |
| 5:49
| Steve had Felicia tape a welcome message for him after they were making out this morning. Can Buzz tell they were just making out? It's a hardcore make-out session too, it's like Steve's running a sex club. Like that guy in Vernon Hills. Then Steve gave her an iPhone. |
| 5:50
| Buzz noticed she's really accentuating her W's. Say my web address! Say it! That's hot. |
| 5:51
| Steve would just like to say that he and Buzz are not stealing newspapers from the hall by the elevators. Steve and Buzz have been in radio longer than Mary's been alive but apparently she thinks there's a moral code we ascribe to. |
| 5:52
| Steve asked for a newspaper and Mary told him they just got the special radio station subscription but for now they have to go out and get them. Steve told her to just go grab one from the hall but she was worried Ramblin' Ray might need them. |
| 5:53
| Ramblin' Ray doesn't need the newspaper, he's a blockhead. He's probably just thankful to not have one because it just highlights what he doesn't know. |
| 5:54
| For years Steve had a newspaper subscription for the afternoon show and people from the office stole them. Mary knows that but she doesn't care about balancing it out. |
| 5:55
| WCKG just fired the entire staff for something called Fresh so it doesn't matter if we steal a couple of newspapers. They fired all those people for something that sounds like a douche! That's Steve's quote for the paper if anyone asks him. |
| 5:56
| Buzz heard Fresh FM in the kitchen and thought Jack had softened up. Has he met Todd Cavanah? He's not softening up anything. |
| 5:57
| Steve also heard they're putting in for a call letter change so they won't even be WCKG. There was some crazy war going on behind the scenes about the Christmas music. It was driving Steve nuts that he couldn't talk about it. |
| 5:58
| The paper boiled it down to WCKG faking out The Lite. First though, Steve just learned some troubling information, he has to call the newsroom. |
| 5:59
| Jim Kid's down in the newsroom which is what we call it in the morning. It's also the traffic center or the weather center. Jim will answer the phone with one of those whenever Steve calls. Let's try that now. |
| 6:00
| Weather center! Yeah! It's cold out there huh? Steve understands that Jim was listening to The Fresh and enjoying it. He wasn't enjoying it, he just heard Blues Traveler and he likes them. If they didn't call it "soft" maybe guys would listen to it. |
| 6:01
| Soft is not something guys listen to. So Jim does like it, he should just admit it. He heard Blues Traveler and he likes them but they don't play them enough on Fresh FM to get him to tune in. |
| 6:02
| Fresh's demographic is 30-40-year old women. Sadly Pete is out of their demographic since he's a 42-year old woman. Pete actually woke up to Jewel this morning and he was quite enjoying it. |
| 6:03
| Well Pete and Jim are enjoying Fresh, that's great. Steve thought it was Fresh 105 but you can't say that because people won't know you're on 105.9. There's no 106 though because all radio frequencies are odd numbers. There's never going to be a 104.2 or 104.4. |
| 6:04
| So Pete woke up to Jewel this morning. It's nice to think about him waking up, probably nude, on a water bed full of mold. Steve doesn't even want to know what happens next but he feels the neighbors were probably woken up by a sloshing sound. |
| 6:05
| Steve heard about someone up in Rogers Park who died in a fire and he was worried it was Pete. Then they said that his three friends escaped and Pete doesn't have three friends. |
| 6:06
| Steve watched Heroes last night. It was the first night he'd been home to watch TV right at 7:00. Actually he was home from 1:00 PM to 4:30 AM this morning, that's too long. Steve's going to have to find something else to do. |
| 6:07
| Buzz also spent a lot of time watching TV yesterday. He actually got to crank the surround sound since no one else was home. |
| 6:08
| Steve watched Chuck which he liked. That girl with him is hot. Then Steve watched Heroes and was trying to answer emails. It was irritating that he had to keep looking up to read the subtitles. |
| 6:09
| Steve thought the episode ended strong but he won't ruin it. It was a good payoff for all the Japan stuff. What Steve really didn't like was that it's Green Week on NBC. NBC is owned by GE, they're they most ungreen company in the world. The run nuclear power plants! |
| 6:10
| Steve forgot what he's talking about before he talked to those two knuckleheads. He can't remember so it's time for the Dahl.com daily poll. Today's questions is "Do you care about the scandal at Oprah's leadership academy in South Africa?" The options are yes and no. |
| 6:11
| Maybe if Oprah hadn't isolated all those girls from their parents someone would have found out sooner about the molesting. Buzz saw that editorialized yesterday. Steve' s feeling is still "who cares?" |
| 6:12
| Oprah was molested by her uncle you know. So was Steve and look how he turned out! |
| 6:13
| Dateline, Johannesburg. "Johannesburg, what's the word?!" Wasn't that the chant? Oh wait, Buzz was for apartheid. |
| 6:14
| They should stop calling these girls disadvantaged. It just sounds hot and like you can take advantage of them. |
| 6:15
| Oprah said she cried for a half hour about this. Steve likes that she keeps a journal of her weeping. Buzz imagines that Steadman is doing all the journaling. |
| 6:16
| If these were college girls you'd have the plot for a porno movie. |
| 6:25
| Oprah wants a whole channel for herself, that's just what we need. Buzz doesn't know if he's ready for that, he only just subscribed to her magazine. |
| 6:26
| Just so Buzz knows, she's on the cover every month. She never puts Gail on there or anything. |
| 6:27
| Steve knows that Buzz had headlines but he wants to finish this Oprah thing. Then we're calling NBC5. They have a segment called "Buzz" that they want Buzz to be on. |
| 6:28
| Oprah's $40 million school opened to much fanfare last year with a star-studded event attended by Nelson Mandela, Spike Lee, Sidney Poitier, Mariah Carey and Tina Turner. Turns out it should have been Ike Turner. |
| 6:29
| Before the allegations arose Oprah told the students she was the "mamma bear" who would protect them. All the way from Chicago? Good thing she has the private jet. |
| 6:30
| In early October 15 girls produced a list of complaints including the sexual assault of a fellow student. Seems like that should be a list all by itself. |
| 6:31
| Oprah has spoken in the past of being raped by a distant cousin, as was Steve. Steve also dated a guy in the 70s who made her do coke. |
| 6:32
| Oprah was also abused by three other men, trusted family friends. As was Steve! She must be the hottest one in the family. Of course she was but that doesn't make it alright. |
| 6:33
| Oprah has campaigned for laws in the U.S. to protect children from abusers. She'll probably have to do that in South Africa too now. |
| 6:34
| After hearing of the allegations Oprah flew to South Africa, on her private jet, to speak with students and encourage them to come forward with their complains. She said it was a chance for them to "break the silence" a silence she imposed. |
| 6:35
| Oprah flew down again, in her private jet, 3 days after that to talk with parents and apologize. It's important to note that she flew down in the private jet. If you have your own jet it's not that tough to fly down there. |
| 6:36
| How do you get to South Africa? Do you just go to Europe and take a right? Buzz thought you could just fly straight down. |
| 6:37
| The headmistress of her school did not have her contract renewed. Steve would like to see Oprah become headmistress. |
| 6:38
| Oprah is adamant that this incident has not affected her desire to help the girls achieve a better future. That'll be easier to do though now that the bar has been lowered for all of them. |
| 6:39
| Once again, Steve's going to say "who cares?" He didn't ask her to build the school for $50 million. If you really want to help people in Africa you should build a bunch of schools for half a million each. They won't have marble foyers or shoe closets with room for 500 pairs though. |
| 6:40
| Steve's calling over to channel 5 now. It's hard to see the numbers on the phone with the glare. Then Steve is covering the numbers with the number he needs to call which is a flaw. |
| 6:41
| Steve has Marco in the newsroom, he's going to send then up to the studio to lock them in. Buzz will not be locked in! We're getting a free traffic report while on hold. |
| 6:42
| Steve thought this thing was going to be about Buzz since it's called "Morning Buzz" He was deliberately mislead. |
| 6:43
| Steve and Buzz will be talking to Dick Johnson and Zoraida Zambolin. Zoraida's pretty hot but she's a bit too skinny. Steve would like to fatten her up a bit, he's afraid she'd break in half or something. |
| 6:44
| Steve's putting both TVs on NBC right now. They're promoting some sort of travel expo that just featured a fat chick in a bikini. That doesn't make Steve want to go anywhere. Buzz thought that was Britney Spears. |
| 6:45
| Alright here we go. NBC's got a very fetching photo of Steve on-screen right now. Dick heard everyone in the studio talking about how much slimmer and younger Steve looked. Did Zoraida say that because that's all that matters. |
| 6:46
| Zoraida has heard of Steve but she wasn't really a listener. But she went to the website and checked him out and saw all the stuff he's done, like the on-air vasectomy, so she's going to become a fan. |
| 6:47
| Dick was wondering what the status was of Garry Meier joining the show. Steve's going to say he won't be joining the show now. It's catching on and everything, just look at Zoraida, she's a new listener. |
| 6:48
| Well that went fairly well. Steve's looking at Zoraida on TV now and he takes back what he said before, she doesn't need anything. She dressed up pretty just for Steve today. |
| 6:49
| Steve's favorite part of these TV interviews is when the people wonder why Buzz isn't talking. Dick Johnson sounded like he would have done anything to win Buzz's approval. |
| 6:53
| Steve thought Brant Miller hated him but he left a welcome message for the new show. Steve doesn't hate Brant Miller, he just likes to make fun of him. |
| 6:54
| Before we get to the headlines Steve wanted to go back to something he just saw on NBC and doesn't really understand. They had a commercial for something called Wynonna on Ice. Ryder? No Judd. |
| 6:55
| It's some sort of concert featuring Wynonna Judd singing and then ice skating. Of course the irony is that Wynonna couldn't get on the ice, she'd break it. She's a monstrosity! And her sister Ashley couldn't be hotter. |
| 6:56
| Of course country music fans love ice skating. Steve can see some guy who listens to US 99 wanting to take the little lady to see Brian Boitano. And Wynonna's mom is just a special guest. Steve would like to see Ashley skating to all those songs. |
| 6:57
| Headlines with Buzz |
| 6:58
| The late night shows went to reruns last night as the writers strike began. Jay Leno admitted he wasn't funny without writers! |
| 6:59
| Steve gets Jay Leno being sympathetic to the writers but he's seen the process at the Tonight's Show. They have 50 guys writing jokes and if they use one of yours you get paid. They have 300 jokes per day and Jay and his producers go through and pick the 10 best of whatever. |
| 7:00
| Can Jay really not write 10 jokes a day for himself? He's supposed to be funny. If Steve were any of those guys he'd be playing up the solidarity aspect, not saying he's not funny. Although we know he's not funny. |
| 7:01
| There's a new poll showing most people are against providing driver's licenses for illegal immigrants. How are they going to get to Steve's house to mow his lawn? |
| 7:02
| Steve doesn't really know about this immigration stuff. What he does know is the people who do stuff at the house for him, at a reasonable price, are immigrants. He doesn't want that to stop. |
| 7:03
| The folks looking for Stacy Peterson have been joined by the professionals at Equusearch. Are they really professionals or are they just a bunch of attention hounds? |
| 7:04
| EquuSearch is famous for not being able to find Natalee Holloway. They have a lot of equipment but they're not part of a law enforcement agency. Are they also going to look for Lisa Stebic? |
| 7:05
| Is Drew Peterson home yet? Steve understands he hasn't been back since he left on his motorcycle and almost hit the curb. Is he hanging out at the Stebic's or something? |
| 7:06
| Four suspects have been captured in the daylight robbery of Buzz's favorite movie theater. When Steve talked about this last week he said it was an inside job and it was. |
| 7:07
| Two pairs of brothers robbed the movie theater last Thursday, dressed in clown masks. Then they took the clown masks off to reveal Spider-man masks. |
| 7:08
| Steve has some more info about Equusearch. The all-volunteer team from Texas is expected to lead the search for Stacy Peterson. The team is equipped with divers, helicopters, dog teams, horses and foot teams. |
| 7:09
| This whole search must be really irritating to all the dudes cruising forest preserves. They've got a bunch of people tromping through them now. Steve hasn't been able to go near any forest preserves in Will County. |
| 7:10
| Now what about this pervert guy up in Vernon Hills? On TV they call it a sex abuse club but the guy didn't call it that. He called it a sex club because it's probably hard to get kids to join if you call it a sex abuse club. |
| 7:11
| Kids wouldn't join a sex abuse club, even with the iPhone parting gift. Steve thinks he might have been in a similar club and he didn't get anything except a sick feeling on the way home. |
| 7:12
| Bail was denied today for Vernon Hills resident Michael C. Rebecca. They keep referring to the guy by his last name so Steve thinks they're talking about a girl. |
| 7:13
| Rebecca allegedly treated the boys as if they were in a club and devised an initiation ceremony that involved tapping their you-know-whats with a gavel. Steve's going to advice against a bench trial on this one. You don't want to go gavel-to-gavel. |
| 7:14
| The prosecutor in the case said Rebecca rewarded some boys with iPods, iPhones, video games and DVDs. Steve would like to think he'd get an iPhone if he was in the club. |
| 7:15
| Steve sent Pete an email about some good drops from the Michael Rebecca press conference. There was some good stuff in there that they could use on the Jack promos for the show. |
| 7:21
| Steve would want an iPod minimum if he brought in a young Buzz Kilman to the sex club. Buzz would want an X-Box just so he could learn how to play one. |
| 7:22
| Steve did sort of send Pete some confusing directions for what he wanted. He didn't really give him a time or a channel. Pete has a few others he's looking for. |
| 7:23
| In the meantime Steve's going to continue with this story. He can tell Buzz that Rebecca also played a game called "whore house' which was a perverted game of hide-and-seek. The first boy found had to have sex with Rebecca. |
| 7:24
| Pete doesn't have anything else from the prosecutor but he does have a few things from his neighbors. He seemed normal even though he always had the blacklight on. |
| 7:25
| Everyone keeps saying these kids are going to needs years of therapy but Steve doesn't think so. Something similar happened to him and he didn't even get an iPhone. He didn't need therapy. |
| 7:26
| Something happened to Steve and his brother involving an older kid. Buzz thinks it's different when an adult turns on you. OK maybe they will need some counseling. |
| 7:27
| When they went to the house of one of the guys who robbed the movie theater they found a flow chart for the dispersing of the money. They're not exactly master criminals although Steve loves the double masks. |
| 7:28
| Live read: Cheeseburger in Paradise |
| 7:29
| Steve got a whole Key Lime pie to take home with him last Friday from Cheeseburger in Paradise. That was mistake and it's gone now. That explains the 4 pound weight gain yesterday. Although Steve's weighing himself at 4:00 AM now which is much earlier than normal. |
| 7:30
| Steve's going to play his first song on Jack which Buzz might remember from The Loop days. Buzz doesn't really remember stuff like that but hearing him might jog his memory. |
| 7:31
| Song: Driver's Seat, Sniff 'n' The Tears |
| 7:35
| Steve used to call that one Sniffin' the Driver's Seat, that's how clever he was. It's because of DJs like Steve that Buzz doesn't know the actual names of songs. He does know that song, he probably calls it Sniffin' the Driver's Seat. |
| 7:36
| Alright, time for a mailbag! First a couple of things though. The web poll at Dahl.com asks whether or not people care about the scandal at Oprah's school. 94% of people say no. |
| 7:37
| Buzz is trying to say something but his mic is off. Steve will pay extra to have it on. |
| 7:38
| Only 11 people have voted yes and 171 said no so it's not a very popular poll. Good news for Buzz though, he won the poll yesterday for the back-up for Tom Brady, the new spokesman for Stetson Cologne. |
| 7:39
| Steve got 12% of the vote, Brendan 37% and Buzz 50%. Buzz doesn't even know how that happened. He was probably voting all morning while Steve snacked. |
| 7:40
| Has anyone from Red Bull called about Steve being a spokesman for sugar-free Red Bull? He'll endorse regular Red Bull too. |
| 7:41
| There's some doctor who says she's treated several kids who got really sick drinking Red Bull and rum. As a drunk it seems to Steve like you'd want to mix that with vodka. |
| 7:42
| But this woman is now on a quest to eliminate Red Bull. It's like when that kid took some Ephedra at spring break and jumped off a balcony. Now Steve has to take that Trucker Speed, God knows what's in that. |
| 7:43
| Steve would also like to object to the caller yesterday who said the sign Big Steve was holding looked like it was written in crayon. Steve saw the sign, it was guerilla but artistic guerilla. |
| 7:44
| The first email is a response to Steve's blog from Wednesday. That's last Wednesday since we haven't had this Wednesday. Steve was concerned about the opening time for Starbuck's. They normally open 10 minutes before the posted time. |
| 7:45
| Most of the Starbuck's in The Loop open at 5:30 AM. That's too late for Steve, they need to be open at 5:00. Doesn't Buzz just love how Steve thinks everyone should cater to him. It's part of his charm. |
| 7:46
| The next emailer alerted Steve to a website that is a global incident map. It has a globe and you can click on any area and find out what's going on. |
| 7;47
| We've got some radioactive material near Des Moines. A man was arrested after police found small amounts of radioactive material in his apartment. He was extracting the material from smoke detectors. |
| 7:48
| The police also found assault rifles, grenades, 20 smoke detectors and materials used to grow psilocybin mushrooms. Steve hopes this isn't The Nadas. |
| 7:49
| This could actually be their tour bus, it's filthy enough to grow mushrooms. Of course that's the tour bus for The Nadas, Steve Dahl and the Dahlfins and Buzz Kilman. The final show of that tour is November 17th. Steve's just going to give away the rest of the tickets on Dahl.com. He likes the clean nature of the breaks on Jack, he doesn't want to insert any extra stuff. |
| 7:50
| Finally one of Steve's favorite emails in a long time. The emailer knows Steve doesn't care a flying whatever what other people think but also knows that Steve enjoys making fun of people on his show. |
| 7:51
| This girl was on the elevator in the Prudential Building when three guys got on on the 9th floor. They didn't think much of her so they started talking. The first guy, Ron, asked where the Steve Dahl poster was for the lobby. A second guy said it didn't matter because Steve wouldn't ever come down there. |
| 7:52
| Now Steve's going to go down there everyday. First he needs to figure out who Ron is. He should be able to since he cracked that movie theater case last week. |
| 7:55
| That's a drop from Chuck. Buzz is unfamiliar with the show, what's the premise. |
| 7:56
| It's complicated and Steve only saw one episode. It's about a computer nerd who somehow knows a bunch of government secrets and has to work with two agents. All Steve knows is the girl on the show is hot. |
| 7:57
| Live read: Townstone Financial |
| 7:58
| Steve got another email from the guy who hates David Hochberg yesterday. He broke up with him again. The guy must have been turned down for a loan or something. |
| 7:59
| The guy always seems to know when David is on the show so he probably didn't really break up with him. |
| 8:00
| We're going to talk to Richard Roeper in a moment, he's got a charity he's wants to promote. |
| 8:01
| Steve the engineer came in and confessed that he was one of the 3 guys in the elevator but it didn't sound that bad when he described it. Steve still doesn't really get it though. |
| 8:02
| There used to be a bunch of posters of Steve in the WCKG offices from various trips b ut they were taken down because it's a new station. Steve's so manly that they probably wanted to take them down for Fresh FM. It would be like having photos of Clint Eastwood at the gynecologists office. |
| 8:03
| On the 9th floor there are B96 and Jack FM posters in the foyer. Steve's probably not going to go down there unless he has a meeting, which he's doing next Tuesday at 10:30. So maybe someone could just hold the posters up when he arrives. |
| 8:04
| Steve doesn't want his posters up anyway, he doesn't want to miss out on the Eddie and Jobo posters. |
| 8:05
| Alright Richard Roeper is on the phone. Steve's pretty sure he hasn't spoken to him since his book Sox in the City came out. |
| 8:06
| Now it's out in paperback with an updated section about how they've sucked lately. Richard wrote a really nice thing in the book about Steve so he wanted to thank him. It might be the coolest thing anyone's ever written about Steve in a book. |
| 8:07
| Steve will go pick up the paperback because he's looking forward to seeing how disgruntled Richard is. Steve did hear this morning on WBBM that there were talks of the Sox trading Joe Crede to the Yankees for Johnny Damon. |
| 8:08
| Steve heard that right as he was driving by Damen. You could probably convince Johnny Damon that we already named it after him. |
| 8:09
| Richard is calling in to promote Swinging Under the Harvest Moon. Is that some sort of sex club thing? It sounds like a sex club. |
| 8:10
| Richard's not biting on the sex club, he's just going to keep rolling. Three of those words could be double-entendres though. |
| 8:11
| The event is for St. Jude's, people can call 1-800 621 5359 for ticket info. |
| 8:12
| Matt Dahl wanted Steve to tell Richard that he is a young radio talent. Richard wrote in his column last week that there was no young radio talent in Chicago. Richard knows Matt is a talent but right now he doesn't have a venue for it. |
| 8:13
| Last Sunday in addition to setting back the clocks he had to set back the radio to 104.3. He doesn't like Fresh FM? |
| 8:14
| Richard has no problem with Fresh FM though. It doesn't seem very Fresh to Steve, there's a kid down the hall running the board and he's just sitting there in a Sox hat. |
| 8:15
| Richard was a little confused yesterday by all the changes on WCKG. First it was news and then it was music. |
| 8:16
| Richard would like to see Steve get that Jack guy in the studio as a co-host for a day. Steve's working on tweaking Jack's attitude a little bit, there was a meeting about it. |
| 8:17
| The promos haven't been as bad today. Yesterday Buzz was offended by proxy. Was it the one that said the show sucked but it would get better? |
| 8:18
| How's Roger doing? Richard is amazed that he's been through all these operations and he's still at the screening room everyday. He's there for Hostel 2, he could probably take a break! |
| 8:19
| But Roger really loves going to the movies. It makes him very happy just to be in the screening room. Buzz is like that although he's not a critic. Richard loves his job but there are some days he wants to jump out of the building. |
| 8:20
| Steve never wants to go to the movies, it's a nightmare. How much noise can people make eating food? |
| 8:24
| Richard Roeper wrote some really nice things about Steve in his White Sox book which was cool. Buzz read that book. He really is a Sox fan. |
| 8:25
| Pat Boyle is on the phone. He was listening to Steve talking to Richard Roeper and he thinks it's cool that Richard didn't go Hollywood and migrate to the Northsiders. |
| 8:26
| Pat actually grew up in Detroit but now he's a fan of the Cubs and the Sox. He just likes being a fan of the good story. Steve thinks he has to pick even if he's a transplant. |
| 8:27
| Doesn't Pat's bio say his best times were spent in the bleachers at Wrigley? He was unemployed at the time, what else was he supposed to do? |
| 8:28
| Sox games are not the place you want to go to get laid, unless you want a monstrosity. The Cell is getting better but it's nowhere near as good as Wrigley is for tail. |
| 8:29
| Wrigley's a big party and there's nothing wrong with that. Personally Steve likes The Cell, it's like a paintball game but with live bullets. |
| 8:30
| Steve's fine with the Johnny Damon rumors. Joe Crede should have had that back surgery before last season, he's dead to Steve now. Unless he has good year next year. |
| 8:31
| Crede is a Boras client. Boras would love to have him in New York where the big money is. |
| 8:32
| Steve really liked seeing Joe Torre at Dodgers Stadium yesterday. He loves the color of those seats. Steve could watch a game there if it's an empty stadium. He grew up listening to Vin Scully on a radio he hid under his pillow. That guy is great but he must be 1,000 years old. |
| 8:33
| They actually had to hold off on the press conference until yesterday because Tommy Lasorda was in Chicago for that Italian-American Sports Hall of Fame. Do they really need a special Hall of Fame for Italians? |
| 8:34
| Last night's Monday Night Football game was very morning radio host friendly because it was over by 8:30. Steve didn't watch any of it. Since he was home all afternoon he watched all 3 hours of ESPN's pre-game. By game time he was sick of it. |
| 8:35
| Last night's game was refereed by Ed Hochuli. It was raining though so he had to keep the guns covered. Did anyone talk about the guns? It seems like something Kornheiser would do. |
| 8:36
| By the way, Vin Scully is 78. He still does the games alone although he only does home games. |
| 8:37
| Bulls are trying to get their first win of the season tonight against the Clippers. Turns out they could use Kobe Bryant. |
| 8:38
| This was supposed to go in the other direction for the Bulls though. They were supposed to get off to a good start, Kobe was supposed to start slow and then the asking price would go down. |
| 8:39
| Joakim Noah is supposed to start tonight. That guy needs to get rid of the Bozo hair and the acne. Steve was going to recommend that Dr. Cornbleet guy but he died. |
| 8:40
| Caller Brent wanted to let Steve know that Tony Kornheiser did talk about Ed Hochuli's muscles. That guy is almost becoming unlistenable. |
| 8:41
| Brent was wondering if Red Bull had called about Steve being their spokesman. Nothing is happening yet but Steve's willing to switch to another drink if he has to. |
| 8:42
| Pat's going to recommend Diet Mountain Dew. Steve's willing to try that plus it's Pepsi, they have deep pockets. |
| 8:43
| Of course we know from last week's staff dinner at Tavern at the Park that Pete doesn't care for Pepsi. He threw the waitress into a tailspin after he said he didn't want Pepsi over Coke but would drink Dr. Pepper. |
| 8:44
| Steve doesn't remember exactly how it went but he'd like to know. After taking Mary's drink order Pete asked for a Coke. She asked if Pepsi was OK and Pete said now, did they have Dr. Pepper. Then Steve said "you're kidding?" which the waitress also said. |
| 8:45
| Then we had to hear the entire list of soft drinks before Pete landed on a Fat Tire beer. The waitress offered that one right away because she knew Pete was a jerk. That's probably their go-to persnickety jerk beverage. |
| 8:46
| Pete bit hard on the Fat Tire and then Jim kid followed him. Pete's a leader of all the persnickety, snobbish people on the staff. And then Brendan was the voice of reason throughout this entire thing. He said that restaurant Pepsi and Coke are virtually the same. |
| 8:47
| Steve felt like he was on a date with Pete. He loses the girl right at the drink order, that's probably why he has to resort to gun play. |
| 8:48
| Well at least Pete made the dinner memorable. All day long he was thinking about how he'd drink his coffee with one hand and it was all undone with the drink order. |
| 8:49
| Steve could not overcome Pete refusing Pepsi and Ed at the bar before they got there trying to order Templeton Rye. |
| 8:50
| Comcast has the Bulls game on tonight. That's a home game against the Clippers. Steve saw Rocky Wirtz on Comcast last night. |
| 8:51
| Steve actually sent Rocky an email last night after seeing his press conference. He's the man. Pat can't believe Rocky got all this done so quickly. |
| 8:56
| Caller John is a Diet Mountain Dew addict. He goes to work about the same time Steve and Buzz do. He drinks it on his way to work and then all day. |
| 8:57
| Is John all jacked on Mountain Dew right now? This is a new segment called Are You Jacked? |
| 8:58
| Mountain Dew has a ton of caffeine in it. It tastes better than the Diet Red Bull though. This isn't going to help Steve become a spokesman for Red Bull. It's not happening though, sometimes Steve needs to apply some negative pressure. |
| 8:59
| Brendan drinks Mountain Dew but he doesn't seem very energetic. Imagine him without the Mountain Dew, he'd be in a coma. |
| 9:00
| Steve got a lot of emails yesterday from people who said they missed him in the afternoon. Steve appreciates that but some of the people wanted to break up with him. They wanted a better explanation for why he moved to mornings. |
| 9:01
| WCKG was changing formats and this was the best options. One of the other options was Steve not working for 3 years but getting paid. He likes to work though. |
| 9:02
| Steve can't really say what the other options were because some of them involved replacing people who weren't replaced. Steve wanted to go somewhere where he wasn't replacing anyone. |
| 9:03
| Steve couldn't do afternoons at Jack becuase that's not how a station like this works. |
| 9:04
| Steve did have a meeting with Jack yesterday about his smart-ass attitude. Steve pointed out that he can be a smart-ass too. Plus he has Jack's book with all their secrets in it. It was given to him by mistake. |
| 9:05
| Caller Bill wanted to recommend mixing diet club soda with diet Red Bull. Steve doesn't really like club soda. Or maybe he didn't like the gin. |
| 9:06
| Bill just had a couple of Buzz TV sightings. The other day he flipped on TBS or TNT or something and Buzz's scene from Silence of the Lambs was on. Then yesterday he flipped on WGN and there's Buzz with his baseball cap on. Buzz had the same look in both of those appearances with the hat on. |
| 9:07
| Buzz says there was no hat in Silence of the Lambs, just some quality elevator acting. The hat might have been in Married to the Mob. |
| 9:08
| Next time Steve needs to get Buzz to talk he should misrepresent his acting work. He came to life when Steve said he had a hat on in Silence of the Lambs. That's outrageous! |
| 9:09
| Live read: Walter E. Smithe |
| 9:10
| Buzz was worried what it would be like to have dinner with his family every night, did that happen yesterday? Buzz did have dinner with his family and it was sort of awkward. There was some interference with the preparation of the meal. So he made dinner then? Did he just heat up the Rice Bowls? Buzz made burgers but someone else made the fries and burned them. He also didn't provide a salad. |
| 9:11
| Buzz was the one who noticed there was no salad. He puts the burger away in two bites-which Steve witnesses last Friday-and he realized he could have used a salad right there. |
| 9:12
| Buzz also doesn't talk much when he eats. So it was probably Aimee and Piper crying while Buzz silently ate. |
| 9:13
| Steve applauds Buzz for doing what he said he'd do. He's not sure if he'll try it again tonight. Piper has martial arts and if she does good she gets Burger King. She loves Burger King, probably because of the King. She should come and meet with Jack for Steve. |
| 9:14
| Buzz did take a nap yesterday but when he woke up he realized that maybe he didn't need one. Steve thought the same thing. He tried to take a nap but ended up watching two episodes of Curb. |
| 9:15
| Buzz did enjoy catching up on some TV in the afternoon. Maybe the new shift will catch up to him but right now he likes it. |
| 9:16
| Steve likes it a lot too, even more than yesterday. He's had a lot of Red Bull today though. |
| 9:17
| Speaking of that there's a guy on hold from Red Bull. Is Brendan sure he's really from Red Bull because this is something he falls for. |
| 9:18
| Caller Brendan works for Red Bull and he's actually in a room with some other Red Bull distributors. So we're having a meeting right now. |
| 9:19
| Red Bull has a program called F.O.R.B., Friend of Red Bull. It only pays in product though. Steve's not sure about that but Red Bull is expensive. That could be a starting point at least. |
| 9:20
| Brendan wants to get Steve hooked up with some Red Bull and a Red Bull fridge for the studio. That doesn't sound too bad, look how fast Steve caved. |
| 9:21
| That fridge would be sweet for the studio. Steve would get one for he newsroom but Jim apparently already bought a mini-fridge. Steve thought it was an insulin fridge and that Jim had diabetes. It's like 2 cubic feet. Buzz says it's just enough for the needs of the newsroom. What does Jim have in there? |
| 9:22
| Steve calls down to the traffic center. How are things on the road? Everyone's getting into work so traffic is thinning out a little bit. |
| 9:23
| Jim has some yogurt in the fridge and an apple. Is that Pete's stuff or does Jim really want to be like Pete? Yogurt and apples are for girls! The only time a guy should eat an apple is if there's caramel on it. That's what Jim has the peanut butter for. |
| 9:24
| Yogurt is definitely for girls though. In every yogurt commercial, it's always a girl. There are never any guys on there. Pete noticed that yesterday when he was watching afternoon TV. |
| 9:28
| Friend of Red Bull is a very good start, Steve's not going to say no to that. Steve likes the diet too because there's only 10 calories in there. |
| 9:29
| As an addict Steve likes to drink a lot of something. 10 Red Bulls is 1200 calories but 10 diet is only 100 calories. You still get whacked the same way. |
| 9:30
| Steve drinks those at Bears games. There's nothing like watching the Bears lose to the Lions whacked out of your head on diet Red Bull. |
| 9:31
| News with Buzz |
| 9:32
| Dennis Kucinich says the best way to avoid war with Iran is to impeach Dick Cheney. Does Kucinich really have a hot wife because everyone says that. Anyone would look hot next to him though, he looks like Alfred E. Neuman. |
| 9:33
| At least Kucinich has the order down right. You don't want to impeach Bush and make Cheney the President. Bush is just Cheney's wingman. |
| 9:34
| Some good news for Duane "Dog" Chapman. He won't be extradited to Mexico to face a pending appeal on kidnapping charges. |
| 9:35
| An organized brawl involving 30 women turned deadly yesterday when one of the participants jumped into a car, drove it through a crowd and killed a pregnant woman. |
| 9:36
| Buzz doesn't really have enough background about this story to answer any questions Steve might have. |
| 9:37
| As we speak doctors in India are operating on a girl born with 8 limbs. She'd make a great hand model. |
| 9:38
| Steve has more on that organized brawl story. It was a planned showdown between 2 groups of women in their early 20s. That's all LAPD knows though. It's probably a gang fight. |
| 9:39
| The fight began shortly after 2:30 PM in the parking lot of the Big Lots discount store. It spilled across the street into a gas station. |
| 9:40
| At the gas station a woman got into a convertible and drove it into a group of women, pinning one of them against a wall. |
| 9:41
| It seems like you could harness this into a pay-per-view event, taking out the part about the pregnant woman dying. It seems like if you're pregnant you'd avoid the big fight though. |
| 9:42
| One witness said the brawl was over a man. That's some man! It's probably Snoop Dogg. |
| 9:43
| Snoop Dogg is Piper's favorite DJ, that's according to her. Buzz thought she could get Piper to record something about Eddie and Jobo but she said she liked Snoop Dogg. |
| 9:44
| What about Steve, she doesn't like him any more? Has Buzz turned Piper against him? Steve's not sure if he'd want her daughter liking Eddie and Jobo or Snoop Dogg. |
| 9:45
| At yesterday's city council meeting Dick Mell came up with an idea to get rid of all the nickel-and-dime taxes with a city income tax. |
| 9:46
| They're not going to knock-out anything, they'll just add the income tax. Steve and Buzz will have to start working in the suburbs. |
| 9:47
| George Ryan reports to prison tomorrow, barring any unforeseen circumstances. Like going to Canada or Mexico? Buzz was thinking UFO abduction. |
| 9:48
| Buzz has some weather also which he got from our weather center. We've got news, weather and traffic all down in Buzz's office. |
| 9:49
| This just in, the Senate has confirmed Michael Muckasey. That's a really unfortunate name. |
| 9:50
| Steve calls down to the newsroom. Jim answers "weather center". He's hit all three. Steve calls back again. Jim answers "newsroom". Steve calls back again, Jim answers "traffic center" Buzz has it all down there, it's a complete morning show. |
| 9:51
| That's Journeyman right there. Buzz has recorded a few episodes but he hasn't gotten around to watching it. |
| 9:52
| Steve likes it alright. The girls are really cute, especially the time-traveling girl. The show looks great too. |
| 9:53
| We don't have ton of time left but Steve has a few things about Drew Peterson. Police came to his house 18 times investigating domestic disturbances. |
| 9:54
| Satellite trucks from national and local TV stations sat idling up and down Pheasant Chase Court. That's a good lead-in on the Tribune story. |
| 9:55
| There's a lot here in this article. Steve's just going to read what he has, no questions. Drew Peterson was investigated 18 times for domestic calls involving his wife Kathleen. |
| 9:56
| Kathleen suffered severe blunt trauma and a lacerated scalp which are injuries consistent with a fall that could have knocked her unconscious. |
| 9:57
| Hopefully there will be some sweet audio tomorrow about this story. The articles are all very long and rambling though. |
| 9:58
| 18 calls spread out over 4 wives is a lot but that's just for one of them. Could Mark Czerniec just call in because there's too much to read and not enough time. |
| 9:59
| So Buzz doesn't know about family dinner tonight? They might just bring him some Burger King. Steve had a bacon, egg and cheese biscuit brought up to him. We can do that now. |
| 10:00
| Mark Czerniec is on the phone. First things first, he wanted to let Buzz know that Snuffy McGee from the Lonesome Pogo Ponies says hi. We like to start every call off with an obscure shout-out to Buzz. Steve thought that one was real. Buzz didn't even flinch. |
| 10:01
| Mark is actively following the story, it's pretty interesting. Steve and Mark are heading down to Bolingbrook after the show to join the search team. |
| 10:02
| That's Mark Czerniec, he collects all the information for the show. He's based out of Racine in a building shaped like Steve. |
