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| 5:32
| There ya go, that's your Clash right there. Not that Steve has to tell Buzz that. Of course that's Should I Stay or Should I Go from their album Combat Rock. Good morning everyone. |
| 5:33
| The song was written in 1981 and features Mick Jones. Buzz knows all this, he's a Clasher. It became the band's only #1 hit. |
| 5:34
| Many legends have arisen about what the song is about including what about Jones' impending dismissal from the band. It's actually about his rocky relationship with Meat Loaf (yes Steve said Meat Loaf) backup singer Ellen Foley. |
| 5:35
| Steve's a DJ so he knows all this. We know what we play and we play what we want on Jack FM. |
| 5:36
| Steve was at the hockey game last night with Pat, they had a great time. Steve gets very jacked up watching hockey though, it's a bloodsport. Buzz needs to come with him sometime. |
| 5:37
| It's amazing how fast those guys can skate and at any moment a fight could break out. Plus the Hawks won. Steve gets jacked up during the game and even when he's leaving the game. |
| 5:38
| Steve wants to leave at just the right time so he can beat the traffic. Last night he got behind some guy in a Jetta, talking on the phone, taking up two lanes. So Steve flashes his brights which means "pick a lane!" |
| 5:39
| Then the guy slows down and starts trying to give Steve a dirty look. For some reason in these situations Pat Dahl likes to do his own thing so he's making hand gestures. In Steve's car he handles all the gesturing. |
| 5:40
| Once they got on the Eisenhower Steve was able to shut the guy down because he was driving a Jetta. Then Pat said Steve has become an irritating driver. |
| 5:41
| After that Steve took his sleeping pills but that didn't work. Normally they take 45 minutes to kick in but Steve was getting irritated that the Eisenhower was down to two lanes so it took longer. |
| 5:42
| Steve didn't see Roe Conn there even though he's stolen the "get-into-hockey" bit. Steve got a letter from some woman who listens to both Steve and Roe Conn. |
| 5:43
| How about that R. Kelly? Is he ever going to jail? He missed his hearing in Chicago because his tour bus broke down...in Utah! He wasn't going to make it back to Chicago even without the breakdown. |
| 5:44
| They haven't even sworn out a warrant for the guy! Steve got arrested at a Little League game because some guy was air thumping his chest and Steve moved his hand away. That was before he understood the subtleties of battery charges. |
| 5:45
| At the time Steve had an agent, for the first time, and he was going to take care of the hearing. The agent forgot and a bench warrant was sworn out for Steve. |
| 5:46
| R. Kelly has a great lawyer, Steve needs to put him on retainer in case the guy ever gets out of the Jetta. |
| 5:47
| The alleged crime took place in 2002 and he still hasn't gone to trial! That's some good delaying right there. In that time he could have gone to college and gotten a degree but he just made about half a billion dollars. He also put out those fine Standin' in the Closet albums. |
| 5:48
| Kelly's four tour buses (you gotta have four) were traveling on Interstate 70 near Green River when they were pulled over for speeding. That was at 7:55 am on Tuesday. Steve doesn't know where Green River is but it doesn't seem like he was going to make his court appearance. Even with a jet he couldn't make it. |
| 5:49
| The buses were cited for speeding as well as violations in the log book. You gotta think that when they pull over four buses of rich black guys in Utah they go over it with a fine-tooth comb. |
| 5:50
| These charges seemed trumped up to Buzz. You have to keep log books, he should know that from their trucking days. |
| 5:51
| The log books are standard procedure. They have log books so truck drivers can't take trucker speed and drive for three days straight. Is Buzz going all Al Sharpton on Steve? |
| 5:52
| Mark Czerniec is saying that R. Kelly's court date was Wednesday morning and he was pulled over on Tuesday morning. It still doesn't seem like he'd be able to make his court date though. Unless he's going 100 mph. |
| 5:53
| Kelly's buses were delayed by snow and then got pulled over. He was still 2 hours away from the courthouse when the hearing was supposed to begin on Wednesday. SO he got pretty close at least. |
| 6:00
| So R. Kelly probably would have been to his hearing on time without the delays. Still though, he didn't make it on time. Call Steve old fashioned but he'd be here a day early for the hearing. |
| 6:01
| It doesn't matter, the case is never getting to trial anyway. Buzz has heard that some evidence has been dismissed. There was a photo of R. Kelly's hand and an expert was going to testify that the vein pattern matched Kelly's hand. |
| 6:02
| Caller Paul is a truck driver, he's just hauling paper. Everyone needs paper. Paul has two things for Steve. First of all, if you have a tour bus like that each one has 2 drivers. So that's 8 drivers total and not one of them can keep a log book? |
| 6:03
| The actual law is that for every 11 hours you drive you have to take 10 hours off. That's because Steve and Buzz abused the system. They had the confederate flag mud flaps and the chrome naked ladies. |
| 6:04
| Buzz can see Mike or Jason driving The Nadas tour bus and getting stopped. They probably don't even have a log book. |
| 6:05
| Caller Ryan keeps seeing commercials for the Standin' in the Closet DVD, there must be 20 tracks on there. |
| 6:06
| This phone call is not going how Steve thought it would. He thought Ryan was calling to correct Steve but it seems like he's more interested in doing his own critique of them. |
| 6:07
| Brendan is a fan of R. Kelly, isn't there some homosexuality at some point in the Standin' in the Closet series? |
| 6:08
| The husband of the woman who R. Kelly is having sex with is "on the down low." He's out seeing a dude while his wife is with R. Kelly. |
| 6:09
| That's the guy who busts in on them when R. Kelly is standing in the closet. Luckily The R Man has a gun on him. |
| 6:10
| It's kind of genius. You've got infidelity going both ways and R. Kelly ends up looking OK for nailing a married chick because her husband is gay. And it all takes place in Chicago! |
| 6:11
| At one point in the hip-hopera, R. Kelly's wife is sleeping with a Chicago cop. So he's completely exonerated for what he did because of the actions of those around him. That seems to be his M.O. in life and on the small screen. |
| 6:18
| Live read: The Little Guys |
| 6:19
| Alright just to get caught up here, Steve's going to read that email from the woman who also listens to Roe Conn. |
| 6:20
| Yesterday Steve accused Roe of stealing his bit about getting back into hockey. Steve used to be into hockey and there's a video of him and Garry as Puckheads. |
| 6:21
| Steve was sort of just joking about all that although it seems like Roe's whole thing is Steve 10 years ago. Now he's going through his Garry break-up. Steve likes Roe though. |
| 6:22
| The woman liked what Steve had to say when Larry Wirtz passed away. That was Steve's favorite part, it's Bill Wirtz and Larry Wert. Larry is alive. |
| 6:23
| Roe went to a game after Bill Wirtz died and he had John McDonough on the show when he was with the Cubs. Roe thinks John will do well with the Blackhawks. |
| 6:24
| Headlines with Buzz |
| 6:25
| Astronaut and Lombard native Dan Tani, aboard the International Space Station, now has to cope with the sudden death of his mother. |
| 6:26
| Dan was just on the show a few weeks ago. When you go up in space they ask you if you want to know if something bad has happened. Steve wouldn't want to but Dan did. |
| 6:27
| NASA got Dan's wife and kids on to tell him the news. Steve met Dan's mom at the shuttle launch, she was very nice and sweet. |
| 6:28
| Dan's mom and dad were both in internment camps, Steve would have a hard time having a good attitude after that but she did. Of course she got the ultimate revenge because her son became an astronaut. |
| 6:29
| Police have called off the search of the Sanitary and Ship Canal for Stacy Peterson. They should start looking in places like Jamaica or Mexico because she ran off with another guy! |
| 6:30
| A father and his three children have been found alive after being lost for nearly 72 hours in Northern California. They were only lost because they were trying to steal a Christmas tree from a forest. |
| 6:31
| When are they going to press charges against this family for stealing a tree from a forest? |
| 6:32
| Rudy Giuliani is in a Missouri hospital with flu-like symptoms. You'd think if you were running for president you'd get a flu shot. |
| 6:33
| The youngest brother of Dennis Kucinich was found dead in his house yesterday. The presidential candidate said that his brother was a genius but struggled with mental illness all his life. That's also what they say about Steve. |
| 6:34
| Publishers have canceled a book on parenting written by Britney Spears' mom after Jamie Lynn Spears announced she was pregnant. |
| 6:35
| Steve's not sure if it was evident yesterday but he sort of dismissed this story. Turns out it's meaty. Jamie Lynn Spears is only 16 and she's on a hit Nickelodeon show. |
| 6:36
| Steve also learned that if the guy who knocked Jamie Lynn up is also underage it's not illegal. Buzz thought the guy was 19 but maybe that's not illegal where they come from. Steve also didn't know that Britney's mom was hot. |
| 6:37
| If Nickelodeon was smart they'd spin this and do a whole thing about teen pregnancy on that show. The Spears family doesn't spin things well though. |
| 6:38
| When Steve got home last night CNN was having a roundtable discussion about Jamie Lynn Spears with about 20 people. That might be another reason why Steve dismissed it. |
| 6:39
| Caller Paul wanted to let Steve know that in some parts of Colorado you can buy a $10 permit and go cut down a Christmas tree. |
| 6:40
| This is not the phone call Steve was expecting. The call screener says California which is what Steve was looking for. He can't pay off on this call, even if the guy did tell Brendan California. |
| 6:45
| Song: All I Wanna Do, Sheryl Crow |
| 6:48
| Alright, time now for the web poll question of the day. Today's question is "how often do you hit the tanning booth?" Right now Steve's going once or twice a month. It makes him feel good when there's no sun but there's been sun lately. |
| 6:49
| The last time Steve went tanning two dudes were working there. They were Kevin Federline types although they were nice guys. It seems like a good place for guys to work because of all the cute girls who come in there. |
| 6:50
| That leads us to the story. Two south suburban women in their 20s were lying naked on tanning beds at an Orland Park salon last year when one of them discovered a peephole in her room. |
| 6:51
| That's hot but wrong. The girls like to go naked because they don't like tan lines. Steve thinks it's wrong if guys don't have tan lines. |
| 6:52
| Two women filed a lawsuit anonymously in Cook County Circuit Court alleging invasion of privacy and intentional infliction of emotional distress against L.A. Tan Enterprises and the owner of that salon. |
| 6:53
| An employee at L.A. Tan's corporate offices in Lincolnwood suggested that maybe the peepholes were made by competitors or another customer. Steve always wonders what's going on in other rooms. |
| 6:54
| The woman's attorney said the woman discovered a pen-sized hole in the wall, quickly dressed (hot) and ran into her friend's room (also hot) where they found another peephole. OH! MY! GOD! |
| 6:55
| The two left the salon without reporting the holes but later one of their fathers called the police. |
| 6:56
| Officers found peepholes about 2 feet off the floor in six tanning rooms. 2 feet? What are you going to see there? That doesn't seem like the right height. |
| 6:57
| At 2 feet you're just going to see the bed open. Although it is awkward getting in and out of those things so maybe you see some things you don't normally see. OK, Steve likes the 2 feet now, it makes sense. |
| 6:58
| Some of the holes has paper stuffed in them, possibly to hide the holes. Orland Park Police Commander Chuck Doll couldn't remember any similar incidents reported in the suburb. That seems like a weird reporter question. |
| 6:59
| An attorney for L.A. Tan, where Steve tans, said she was unaware of the lawsuit and declined to comment. |
| 7:00
| An L.A. Tan corporate trainer, acting as a spokeswoman, said the company believes the holes were made either by a customer or someone trying to damage their reputation. |
| 7:01
| Steve met the guy who owns the L.A. Tans, they were going to advertise on the show. They also sponsored a beach party. It seems like their target are women in their 20s but if more people know that it can also make you feel better that might expand. |
| 7:02
| If the holes were made by another customer wouldn't employees start getting suspicious when they kept going in there and not getting tanned? |
| 7:03
| Maybe they're tanning and looking. That's even better! |
| 7:04
| Caller Marnie's husband is a doctor. He prescribes tanning for people with seasonal affectiveness disorder, or S.A.D. Steve thinks he might have that. |
| 7:05
| Steve feels instantly better as soon as he's in that tanning bed and the lights come on. The boys make fun of him for tanning though saying it's not manly. What's more manly than going into a tanning salon and not caring what anyone thinks and then admitting it?! Plus he's got a sweet watch tan line. |
| 7:06
| Buzz is wondering if Marnie was named after the movie. She was named after her grandmother but her brother's name is Mark, the name of the Sean Connery character in Marnie. Mark and Marnie make out in the movie which is a little awkward. |
| 7:07
| What is Marnie just so Steve knows. It's an Alfred Hitchcock movie with Tippi Hedren as a kleptomaniac. Sean Connery tries to save her. |
| 7:08
| Steve hasn't seen that one although he likes Alfred Hitchcock movies. Maybe he'll have a Hitchcock marathon over the holidays, after he goes tanning. |
| 7:09
| Well there you go, it's doctor prescribed. That's the ultimate justification for tanning. It's too bad that guy never pulled the trigger on buying some ads on the show. Steve's a pioneer in the area of middle-aged men tanning! |
| 7:10
| There's another Steve Dahl in the L.A. Tan system, he tans at a different salon though. |
| 7:11
| Sometimes Steve will hear form someone who says he was spotted in a bar or someone was saying they were him. And Steve's never even heard of the bar. |
| 7:12
| Last year at Arlington there was a guy who looked like Steve from 10 years ago, being identified on the Jumbotron as Steve. |
| 7:13
| Sometimes Buzz hears that someone was impersonating him at a restaurant. If you're trying to get free food at a restaurant Buzz isn't the best person to impersonate, unless you're at Johnny Rocket's. |
| 7:14
| By the way, Steve is officially out of the horse racing business. All of the horses he had ownership in are either dead or were sold to someone else in a claiming race. |
| 7:15
| When Steve owned horses he signed up for an email alert service that updates him on races the horses are in. He can't figure out how to unsubscribe though and he keeps getting updates on Aloha Friday. |
| 7:23
| That's a drop from a very special Office. That's one of those episodes where you see a sad Michael and you feel sorry for him but it's still funny. |
| 7:24
| Ben Gay is here with some sports. And a buenos dias to you Buzz! |
| 7:25
| Buzz looks fantastic, how's the new hair? Is it coming in? It's going to be a few months before he sees any progress. |
| 7:26
| Well whatever Buzz is doing he should keep it up, he looks fantastic, like a puma. As opposed to Buzz's fat friend, where is he? Does he have to leave every time Ben comes in? |
| 7:27
| Ben feels that, secretly, Steve has feelings for him. That's why he leaves every time Ben comes in. |
| 7:28
| The Blackhawks beat Nashville 5-2 last night. Nashville is of course Hockeytown USA. |
| 7:29
| The ban has been lifted on Ben at Hawks games, thanks to John McDonough. He's still not allowed in the lockerroom, only the press box. That's probably for the best, Ben can't concentrate on his work when he's down there. Ben's a professional but he's also a man with needs. |
| 7:30
| So Ben was at the game and this guy in a Predators jersey stands up and throws a catfish onto the ice! |
| 7:31
| Is that a new tradition Buzz isn't aware of? The guy then started swearing and flipping the bird, even though his team was down by 3 goals. |
| 7:32
| Everyone could tell there was a catfish on the ice but Khabibulin still felt the need to point at it with his stick. |
| 7:33
| Then some guy came out with a shovel and scooped the catfish up. |
| 7:34
| Buzz is wondering what the significance of the octopus on the ice is. This comes up all the time and Ben can never remember what it means. He doesn't need to know since it's a Detroit thing and he's not in Detroit. |
| 7:35
| Ben thinks it has something to do with the original 8 hockey teams but there were only 6 original teams. Hopefully someone can call in and tell us what it means and then Buzz can write it down so he doesn't forget. |
| 7:36
| Well whatever it was, that Nashville fan should have been beaten up. Back in the day at the Chicago Stadium he wouldn't have even made it to the concourse. |
| 7:37
| Caller Scott, welcome to the Ben Gay Sports Hour, where were talk about hockey to a disinterested Buzz Kilman. Buzz does care about squid and octopi. |
| 7:38
| The octopus has 8 legs but there is a connection to the 6 original teams. The 8 games represent the 8 games you had to win to win the Stanley Cup. |
| 7:39
| Buzz wants to know the appropriate moment to throw your octopus, if you'll pardon the expression. People throw the octopus when the it seems like victory is assured for their team. |
| 7:40
| Ben can't spin this prize wheel, it's so heavy. Buzz thinks he needs to get into a good stance and then push with his butt. That's how he got banned from the United Center. |
| 7:41
| Fans of the Nashville Predators have created their own unique way to support their team. The first instance of the catfish toss is believed to be on October 30th, 2003 at the Gaylord Entertainment Center against the Red Wings. |
| 7:42
| A fan managed to toss the raw fish over the glass onto the ice after Nashville scored their first goal of the contest. |
| 7:43
| The reason for choosing the catfish isn't clear although some people believe it's because Nashville was often a bottom-feeder in their division when they first came to the NHL. |
| 7:44
| So this guy brought a catfish to the game and threw it anyway even though his team was losing. If you come to a game with a catfish you probably don't want to leave with it. |
| 7:52
| That's a drop from Scrubs which Ben just loves. Pete played it especially for him. They have similar taste in TV shows and egg nog. |
| 7:53
| When is Ben going to get the invite up to Rogers Park. Pete is free any weekend. Will there be special gas station egg nog? Could Pete also pick up an air freshener, a lighter and some bling. |
| 7:54
| Ben was thinking he'd bring over the Grey's Anatomy DVD and they'd marathon it, maybe make some caramel corn as well. Has Pete ever made caramel corn with another man, reaching around him. |
| 7:55
| Caller Thomas is in Buffalo Grove working but the screen says McHenry. We like to say where people hail from, not where they are. |
| 7:56
| Ben is demanding a status report from McHenry, how was it when he left? How are things in Buffalo Grove? Thomas doesn't really like it, he's glad he doesn't have to live there. |
| 7:57
| Why doesn't Thomas like Buffalo Grove? Is it the buffaloes? Is he always stepping in cow chips? |
| 7:58
| Thomas thinks a new tradition at the United Center should be the team beating up any fan who throws something on the ice. |
| 7:59
| Thomas might have thought he was talking to Steve there. That's OK though, he's new we don't want to scare him away. |
| 8:00
| Anyway the Blackhawks won last night and their newly acquired winger made his presence known with an assist. |
| 8:01
| The Bulls beat the Wizards in Washington last night, led by Ben Gordon's 22 points. |
| 8:02
| Lance Briggs hopes to put the interests of his 3 month old daughter ahead of a messy legal battle with the child's mother. |
| 8:03
| Briggs says he's learned his lesson and hopes other guys coming up and learn from him. |
| 8:04
| The Cubs introduced Japanese right fielder Kosuke Fukudome to the media yesterday. He said he hopes to help the team win a World Series, through a translator. |
| 8:05
| Ben has one tip for Mr. Fukudome, learn English. That translator stuff gets old mucho pronto fasto. |
| 8:06
| Buzz is wondering if we know that he has a translator. Ben said that in his story. Buzz needs to pay more attention, Ben demands it! Has Buzz met another man? Is that it? Is it because of the weight Ben has put on? |
| 8:07
| Bill Parcells has a 4-year deal in place to be the Miami Dolphins VP of Operations. |
| 8:08
| Well that's it for sports. When Ben comes back from the break he'll have lost 5 pounds, just for Buzz. |
| 8:09
| By the way Buzz, there's a candy cane waiting in your office from Ben. It's nice and thick like Buzz likes them. |
| 8:15
| Fukudome needs to learn to speak English, that should be job #1. If he's going to take all that money from the good old U.S. of A it seems like he should learn English. |
| 8:16
| Apparently he only recently decided to come to the U.S. so he has until spring training to learn. When Buzz went to Japan he studied up on Japanese and he was only there for a week. |
| 8:17
| If you ever go to Japan, don't have the hamburger at the airport, it's white. Steve could have told you that and he's never even been to Japan. |
| 8:18
| Live read: Templeton Rye |
| 8:19
| You might recall Steve's story from a few weeks ago when he and Mike Dahl were in the Ketel One club at the United Center. At the bar there were 4 seats and two guys were sitting right in the middle. |
| 8:20
| Steve moved those guys but Mike didn't want him to. He actually moved a chair so all they had to do is scoot down. He actually used the word scoot which should diffuse everything. |
| 8:21
| They did scoot but seemed to have some trouble doing it. Mike noticed all the great top-shelf liquor in the bar and Steve told him about Judge & Dolph. |
| 8:22
| Then one of the guys said he worked for Judge & Dolph in their wine division. Steve told the guy that Judge & Dolph were now distributing Templeton Rye and he acted like he knew all about it but he clearly didn't. Then Steve asked the bartender to grab a bottle for them to look at. |
| 8:23
| As they were leaving Mike told Steve that he "owned that guy." When you're at a bar, you can't sit right in the middle like that. |
| 8:24
| Al Capone called Templeton Rye "the good stuff" and there are even rumors that he smuggled in several bottles of it when he as at Alcatraz. |
| 8:25
| Templeton Rye has a great Chicago connection so it's perfect for holiday parties. You bring a bottle of Templeton Rye to a party and you've got something to talk about. |
| 8:26
| Buzz is amazed that we know so much about Al Capone's life but we don't know anything about his time behind bars. He probably wasn't being beaten up in prison out at The Rock though. |
| 8:27
| Song: Bolingbrookville, Steve Dahl |
| 8:30
| Steve got an email from a listener with some info about the catfish guy from last night's Hawks game. |
| 8:31
| Some Nashville fan threw the catfish onto the ice when it was clear his team was going to lose and then started flipping everyone off as he was leaving. Steve was disappointed at the time that he wouldn't get to see the guy being beaten. |
| 8:32
| Turns out the guy was detained by United Center security and then arrested by the police. |
| 8:33
| Steve would like to do the Drew Peterson Enquirer stuff but he's seeing some stuff about Al Capone's prison time. Would Buzz prefer to do that first? |
| 8:34
| The best movie Buzz has ever seen about Al Capone is called Capone with Rod Steiger. At the end of the movie he's in Alcatraz and he gets stoned by a group of prisoners. |
| 8:35
| Hopefully what Steve has is enough for Buzz. He fully expects him to cancel his trip to Mexico so that he can go to San Francisco and pour over their documents everyday. |
| 8:36
| In 1932 Al Capone was sent to a tough prison in Atlanta where he was able to take control and obtain special privileges. He was then transferred to Alcatraz where he had no contact with the outside world. |
| 8:37
| Capone refused to participate in prisoner rebellions and tried to bribe guards which landed him in solitary confinement. |
| 8:38
| Capone made enemies at Alcatraz by showing disregard for the social order. He cut in line while prisoners were waiting for a haircut. He liked to get the haircuts. He had the barbershop in that hotel he based himself out of. Was that the Blackstone? Steve can't remember but it's going condo. |
| 8:39
| Buzz would like to know Steve's source on all this because he's never heard any of it. Steve doesn't want to reveal his sources, what if Roe Conn steal his bit. |
| 8:40
| Buzz is fascinated by all of this. Steve sort of figured that Buzz's search for info on Capone's time in prison wasn't exhaustive. |
| 8:41
| An unidentified inmate once threw a heavy metal sash at Capone but he only suffered a gash on his arm after being pushed out of the way by bank robber Roy Gardner. Wasn't that the name of the guy on All My Children? |
| 8:42
| Caller Mark wanted to let Steve know that Capone's hotel was the Lexington on Michigan Avenue. That's also the hotel where Geraldo was looking for the hidden vault. |
| 8:43
| It sounds like Mark is standing on the wing of a jet. |
| 8:44
| Buzz remembers Geraldo in the vault, it almost ended his career. It's still one of the highest rated TV specials ever though. |
| 8:45
| Buzz still wants to know how all this info got on Wikipedia. He's seen all the Al Capone movies, none of that was in there. |
| 8:46
| Steve used to make fun of Mark for going to Wikipedia but it's pretty useful. They have everything on there. |
| 8:54
| That's Geraldo shooting a tommy gun. The weapon is hot, clear down range. If you were a fly on the wall in the Kilman house you might hear that phrase coming from the bedroom. |
| 8:55
| The Mystery of Capone's Vault was produced by Tribune Entertainment and syndicated. It was highly rated and eventually led to Tribune Entertainment giving Geraldo his own talk show. |
| 8:56
| So he wasn't too embarrassed by the whole thing. He was razzed about it by people like Steve and Buzz, malcontents. |
| 8:57
| Drew Peterson is back in the Enquirer, on the front cover. He's hired a PI, hopefully he can find Stacy. She's probably at a Sandals resort of maybe Hedonism. |
| 8:58
| Buzz likes the Sandals resort in Montego Bay, Jamaica. Maybe Drew should start cold calling various Sandals resorts to find Stacy. |
| 8:59
| The resort of Buzz stays at is fairly conservative but there are some crazier places with more partying. |
| 9:00
| What would Drew say when he called the resort? She wouldn't be staying under her own name. Would he just ask if they've seen a woman who looks like she got a boob job, tummy tuck and some hair removal. |
| 9:01
| The Enquirer also says that Oprah doesn't love Steadman any more. |
| 9:02
| Hey Pat Boyles is on the phone. Oprah and Steadman's relationship has been on very shaky ground for a long time. They went into counseling, conducted by a clergyman. |
| 9:03
| The Enquirer is alleging that Drew threw a dining room chair at the hutch in their house and it's in disarray. |
| 9:04
| So what's going in sports Pat? Nothing as serious as what's going on with Oprah and Steadman, that's for sure. |
| 9:05
| Lance Briggs spoke to the media yesterday about his future with the Bears. At times he was saying all the right things and made it sound like he wanted to return to the team. |
| 9:06
| But then he also said that ultimately he has to get paid. He certainly seems to be getting laid. The Bears might want to include a gross of condoms with his next contract. |
| 9:07
| Ron Turner says the criticism he's getting this season isn't effecting him. That just proves to Steve that he doesn't care. |
| 9:08
| How could Ron Turner still believe in their game plan for this season? They're 5-9! |
| 9:09
| Steve HATES Ron Turner. Once again he'd like to point out that three years after he left U of I, they're in the Rose Bowl. |
| 9:10
| How can he say they're going to keep doing what they've been doing this year. They've been losing, that's what they're doing! |
| 9:11
| Steve wants to hear the Ron Turner audio again, he loves hating the guy. He feels that Lovie hates him too. |
| 9:12
| Ron Turner is a corporate cramdown, as Drew Hayes would say. |
| 9:13
| Even Mike Ditka makes more sense than Ron Turner does. Steve's going to drive up to Lake Forest and find Ron Turner if he hears that tape one more time. |
| 9:14
| Ron Turner doesn't read the papers, he hasn't all year. It's just a game anyway right. He's just trying to make a living, so they lose a few games, big deal. |
| 9:15
| Pat can see Billy Jack interviewing Turner after the game and then Steve coming out of nowhere to tackle him. |
| 9:16
| Terrell Owens is giving Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson some relationship advice, via the media. He's basically telling Jessica to stay away from Tony during the games. |
| 9:17
| T.O. is worried about Romo being distracted. That doesn't mean much coming from a guy who pulled a Sharpie out of his sock and signed a ball during a game after a touchdown. |
| 9:18
| Steve can't imagine that Tony Romo would really be distracted by his girlfriend being at a game. She's not his first girlfriend, he's probably played plenty of games where he had hot chicks in the stands. |
| 9:19
| The Hawks and Bulls won last night, we've got a Japanese fella in town who can't speak English. |
| 9:20
| Pat's going to spare us audio of Fukudome's translator but he wants to give Cubs fans a preview of what they're going to hear next year. |
| 9:21
| That's a call from some Japanese baseball game, something big must have happened. Ron Santo has a lot to live up to but he can get pretty emotional. |
| 9:22
| Steve Stone will be broadcasting with Ed Farmer and Chris Singleton for Friday home games. Maybe Steve could do Thursday games, there are a lot of afternoon games on Thursdays. |
| 9:30
| As a season ticket holder Steve is demanding the Bears fire Ron Turner. |
| 9:31
| News with Buzz |
| 9:32
| The mother of astronaut Dan Tani was killed yesterday when her car was struck by a freight train. |
| 9:33
| The grandmother of a California family that went missing while trying to steal a Christmas tree says she got a phone call from a psychic an hour before they were found. |
| 9:34
| That's what happens when you try to steal a Christmas tree. Those mountains you see behind the Rose Bowl stadium, Steve grew up around there. Stealing trees from the forest is frowned upon. |
| 9:35
| Rudy Giuliani spent the night in a hospital with flu-like symptoms. And opponent Mike Huckabee is surging in the polls. |
| 9:36
| There's a whole thing with Huckabee and a campaign commercial with a Christmas tree and a cross in the background. It's not really a cross, it's just a bookcase but it looks like a cross. |
| 9:37
| Mike Huckabee doesn't seem smart enough to put a subliminal message in his campaign ad. |
| 9:38
| New Hampshire pollsters found that one-third of women under 30 said Oprah's support of Barack Obama made them less likely to support him. 73% of women said it made no difference to them. Maybe she should have made Barack seem like one of her Favorite Things. BARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK OOOOOOOOOOOBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMAAAAAAAAAA! Then she could put miniature Barack Obama's made of chocolate under everyone's seats. |
| 9:39
| Lobsters may hold the key to developing a new weapon on the war on terror. Is the weapon claws? The weapon is a hand-held device that could allow people to see through wood, concrete and steel. |
| 9:40
| The technology is based on the lobsters ability to see through dark, cloudy water. They're going to have lobsters screening luggage? If it screens your luggage in Boston then you get to take the lobster home with you. |
| 9:41
| If R. Kelly doesn't get to court today he could wind up behind bars. Is he showing up today? If he's not there now he's in trouble. He did show up. |
| 9:50
| Drew Peterson is tired of all the media attention, he doesn't understand it. For starters, people like the missing wife cases. |
| 9:51
| Second, we know a lot more about Drew than we know about Craig Stebic. Stebic sort of stayed private. His wife is still missing though! |
| 9:52
| OK, on to the Enquirer. Drew Peterson's third wife, Kathleen Savio, is reaching out from beyond the grave. |
| 9:53
| Letters written by Savio describes horrors she endured while being married to Drew. Her words are chilling. |
| 9:54
| Kathleen accuses Drew of attacking her while in full SWAT gear in a letter she wrote to authorities. |
| 9:55
| Drew looks great in his SWAT gear by the way, especially with that mustache. |
| 9:56
| Drew's Dateline special is on NBC tomorrow night. Be there! It's already in the can, he recorded it when he did the Today's Show, maybe. There have been so many interviews in the last month. |
| 9:57
| Unfortunately he hasn't bedded any reporters yet. He should have kept that SWAT uniform. |
| 9:58
| Quite frankly this doesn't seem like Drew's dining room on the cover of the Enquirer. That wasn't his bedroom a couple of weeks ago. |
