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| 5:28
| Good morning Buzz Kilman, how are you this fine morning? Buzz is wondering if Steve requested this song that's playing right now. |
| 5:29
| Steve's in control so he requested it of himself. Buzz is just wondering because Jack is so adamant about not taking requests. It's OK if you take a request from yourself but not a third party. Although Steve might have taken a request from a third party. |
| 5:30
| Alright everyone it's the Steve Dahl Show with Buzz Kilman who's contractually obligated to be here. He's got nowhere else to go though, it's like An Officer and a Gentleman. |
| 5:31
| Buzz is featured in today's Thought for the Day which is the last thing Steve does before he goes to bed. It doesn't get sent out until the next morning though. Today's Thought for the Day was "Tune in today as Buzz plays Devil Duster's advocate for perverts, miscreants and dyslexics erehwyreve." |
| 5:32
| Of course Devil Duster was a Buzzism from yesterday, he said that instead of Dirt Devil. A Devil Duster is a jacket the devil wears. It might have been the kind of jacket Hillary was wearing when she landed in Bosnia. Under heavy sniper fire Buzz! |
| 5:33
| That thing seems like a huge gaffe and yet Hillary has turned her attention to Jeremiah Wright. That guy has said some crazy stuff, like the government is behind the AIDS epidemic. But the Bosnia gaffe things like a big deal. |
| 5:34
| Steve's really sick of both Hillary and Barack. Buzz has to admire Barack because during all of this he takes off for the Caribbean for a few days rest. That has Buzz written all over it though. |
| 5:35
| Buzz thinks Bill is advising Hillary on all of this stuff. The difference is that he's such a good ole boy and all of this negative stuff just rolled off him. He was able to charm the dress off an intern. |
| 5:36
| Hillary says she misspoke but it's way more than that. It's a complete embellishment of reality. Hillary's trying to get the Jeremiah Wright stuff back on the news but it seems like no one else wants to hear it. |
| 5:37
| It seems like when you're in church the main reason you're there is for God. Steve's going with Ron Paul anyway although he's thinking of switching to Ralph Nader. |
| 5:38
| Nader's campaign has really taken off hasn't it? It's like he just entered the race to annoy people. Steve thinks it's a pretty good scam though. When you enter the campaign you can probably start raising a lot of money. There are probably idiots who will donate to the guy. |
| 5:39
| Then when you drop out you pay taxes on the money you raised and the rest is yours to keep. |
| 5:40
| Everyday when Steve comes to work there's a guy in a street sweeper on Lower Wacker filling it up from a fire hydrant. Usually the hose from the sweeper to the connection is very leaky, leaving a puddle of water at the bottom of the ramp where Steve makes an illegal u-turn. He's not sure if it's illegal but if there are cops around he doesn't make it. |
| 5:41
| So this guy is sitting in his street sweeper and the fire hydrant is just flowing into the street. He must have forgot to hook the hose up to the street sweeper. Steve was going to tell him but he didn't want to get involved. Maybe part of the guy's job is to let the hydrants run for a while. |
| 5:42
| Steve was coming off a series of drag races with a guy in a pick-up truck. He was just minding his business, sitting at a traffic light and the guy pulls up. As soon as the light turns green the guy just floors it for no reason. |
| 5:43
| The lights couldn't have been more out-of-sequence so they kept stopping at every intersection and every time the light turned green the guy floored it. Steve finally decided he needed to shut the guy down, even though his radar detector was going off. At some point it doesn't matter, he can't lose that. |
| 5:44
| Steve beat him around a turn and then he didn't care any more. He got up to around 100 on the Stevenson though, it's like the Autobahn out there. Did Buzz see that crash on the Autobahn? |
| 5:45
| There was video of it on the news yesterday, about 100 cars or so. Although they were saying on the news that the speed limit on the Autobahn was 80 mph. Steve knew that wasn't right and he was yelling that at the TV. You can go 65 downstate, what would be so great about the Autobahn if you could only go 80? |
| 5:46
| Also does Steve care about D.B. Cooper's parachute? Steve doesn't even really care about D.B. Cooper. Buzz cares because he's a Prison Break fan. There was a character who claimed he was D.B. Cooper on the show. |
| 5:47
| He was also featured on the show Journeyman at some point. The main character disappeared from a plane so they thought he had something to do with D.B. Cooper. And Steve yelled at his TV then too. He said "D.B. Cooper?! That was in the 70s!" |
| 5:48
| The recommended speed on the German Autobahn is 81 mph but there is no speed limited. The Austrian and Swiss Autobahns have speed limits of 81 and 75 respectively. What's the point of having a speed limit on the Autobahn? Steve does 80 on the Stevenson with impunity, why don't they just call that the Autobahn? |
| 5:49
| Yesterday on the way home there was an accident on the inbound Stevenson, some guy crossed three lanes of traffic and hit an overpass support post and died. Steve was worried because he and Buzz didn't cover it but it happened after the show ended. |
| 5:50
| But Steve turned Jack on and it was just dance music. There's a lot of dance music on Jack right after the show although Todd always denies it. Yesterday Steve heard Safety Dance and The Politics of Dance. They both have "dance" right in the title! |
| 5:51
| The guy in that Stevenson was wearing a seatbelt but he still died. He hit the post head on though, and not in the DJ way. Of course the post in radio means when the vocals start. |
| 5:52
| When Steve first started in radio they didn't call it "hitting the post". Buzz only knows the term from working in radio. Steve can talk up anything you give him though. If someone would bring him one of those Have a Nice Day CDs Steve would be glad to try. |
| 5:53
| It's not a term that people in radio used though, it became popular in the 80s, probably spread by people like Wendy Snyder and Bob Stroud who never really did it. |
| 5:54
| Steve just heard loud footsteps outside the studio, that was Pete running to get one of the CDs. How did we even start talking about this? Why can't Steve remember? It was because he said that guy in the van hit the post and Buzz said "hit the post". He should have just said pillar. |
| 5:55
| Alright Pete has brought in some CDs. The first one has no CD in the case, that's some bad filing. Buzz should notice that the back of the CD so Steve has no idea what songs are on here. |
| 5:56
| Steve hopes Todd is waking up right now and hearing this song. Steve doesn't even know what it is, it's a very complicated song though. We've got a blind man sitting in the bleachers at his son's baseball game. But then the blind man isn't at the last game. |
| 6:01
| Do we need to start that song about the blind man in the bleachers over again? Buzz wouldn't mind hearing it from the beginning. The story seems very compelling and Buzz would hate to deny anyone the complete ride. |
| 6:02
| First something from About.com, a user was looking at their radio glossary and was wondering how DJs consistently "hit the post" without going over the vocals. |
| 6:03
| Hitting the post is described as the art of talking up to the point of a song when the lyrics being with out "stepping" on the beginning of the vocals. "Stepping" was a term that Steve did use but he's just going to say "hitting the post" and not act like it's some new-fangled term. |
| 6:04
| Steve imagines that down at The B they still call it "hitting the post" and when Eddie hits the post Jobo congratulates him, and vice-versa. Although they both sound the same. And they both look like Danny Bonaduce. |
| 6:05
| When DJs played songs off of 45s provided by the record companies they were usually pressed with mono and stereo sides and often included the intro time for the convenience of DJs. |
| 6:06
| A few years ago Steve was forced to go Christmas shopping and he went into Restoration Hardware, which is some fake hardware store that doesn't really have hardware. |
| 6:07
| Restoration Hardware has stuff like vintage-looking record players and all of these people were examining them and holding them up in wonder. Steve used to play music off of these things! |
| 6:08
| Steve was just trying to prove he could hit the post with these Have a Nice Day CDs and some of them aren't even in the case. Brendan used to be in charge of the music library although Pete was the one who had to get up and get the CD. Brendan used to be in charge of the music library but he might have relinquished that to Tina who is no longer here. We're looking for an intern by the way. |
| 6:09
| Steve needs to stop for a second and do something else. There was something on Dahl.com that said "Steve Wants You" and for a week he didn't know what it was. He finally clicked on it and it's something about the intern search. |
| 6:10
| It took Steve all day yesterday to get that changed to "Steve wants you to be an intern" So far only one person has responded, a guy who didn't include his email. Adam doesn't even have to respond to that. |
| 6:11
| Adam's pretty sure he has to respond to everyone who applies. That's probably good, Steve doesn't want to get sued. |
| 6:12
| Steve just though the "Steve wants you" was a little scary. Adam wants the interns to come in a little scared. Steve doesn't care what Adam wants, when is he going to realize that? |
| 6:13
| Yesterday Adam asked Steve for $150,000 for a project they're working on. He said he likes to do things first class. Then maybe Adam should open up his checkbook! |
| 6:14
| Adam is working on the It's Too Early project and Steve was told it would cost $100,000. But then Adam bumped it up to $150,000 and he was negotiating some sort of distribution deal with the people working on the project. |
| 6:15
| Steve can't wait for the meeting on It's Too Early that he's having with Adam. He should probably wear Kevlar. Steve just wants to put the DVD out and he doesn't want to spend $150,000. If they sell 2,000 copies they'll break even. Steve doesn't need the money, he just doesn't want to lose the money on a 20 year old TV show. |
| 6:16
| Adam wanted to have the meeting with Ed, Steve can see why now. Ed wants to do it in house though. Steve realizes these things cost money. Like that Disco Demolition DVD, he never made back the money on that. |
| 6:17
| Although part of the problem there was that Jeff Schwartz got into some sort of distribution deal with Walgreens. They were all in Walgreens stores and then some Walgreens exec came back from vacation, hated Steve's guts and had them pulled off the shelves. |
| 6:23
| It just occurred to Steve-and probably Pete as well since he played that Office drop-that Adam is our own Dwight Schrute. Dwight is very competent, he's the best salesman at Dunder-Mifflin. |
| 6:24
| Adam is very competent too but he's also crazy. That thought had also crossed Pete's mind. Does Pete think he's Jim Halpert? Or is he Creed? Pete's probably Kevin, the bald guy who's in the Police cover band. |
| 6:25
| Over the weekend Buzz saw Pam's boyfriend from The Office in the horror movie Shutter. It was a very good movie but sort of a shock to see the guy from The Office. What's the movie about? |
| 6:26
| There's this couple on there honeymoon in Japan and everything starts off great. But they start looking at the photos they've taken and keep noticing a shadow in every single one of them. Turns out they're being spirit-stalked which happens a lot on honeymoons. |
| 6:27
| The husband was involved in some hideous crime in his past involving a young girl who's stalking everyone. Buzz loves the Japanese horror movies and although this was a remake it had the Japanese feel. |
| 6:28
| Steve's seeing something on his TV that he has to stop. It's a report about that woman with the Barack Obama song. Buzz has read about this song, he heard Hillary was featured somewhere in there. It's actually a midget McCain. |
| 6:29
| There's also a John McCain video with three fat black women singing "It's raining McCain." What does that mean?! |
| 6:30
| This girl doing the Obama song is sort of a low-rent J-Lo. She's not bad looking though. Apparently she didn't vote for Obama in the primaries though. |
| 6:31
| Then there's a little person dressed as Hillary Clinton, then as Amy Winehouse. Is that what Buzz was talking about? It's too easy to make music these days. |
| 6:32
| Do we want to go back to that song from earlier? Buzz wants to hear the whole story behind it. First Steve has the new Barack Obama song. Whoever is doing the videos for this girl is using some pretty sophisticated technology. The singer is super-imposed in various videos with Hillary Clinton. |
| 6:33
| OK so going back to earlier in the show, Steve was talking about hitting the post on songs. It's an innate ability he has, it's genetic. Steve comes from a long line of DJs. |
| 6:34
| The second song that Steve was talking up was something he'd never heard and it ended up being a really weird song about a blind guy sitting in the bleachers at a football game his son is playing in. Buzz thought it was baseball but Steve heard "touchdown" |
| 6:35
| Steve's just going to start playing the song and see what it's about. The blind man is watching his son in a football game. |
| 6:36
| In the last game of the season the kid's dad isn't in the bleachers for some reason. Steve thinks the guy is dead maybe. Maybe the son killed him? Who comes up with a song like this? |
| 6:37
| After halftime the son came into the game and played really well. The kid found out his dad died during halftime and now that was the first time he was ever able to see him play. |
| 6:38
| That song is faded out on the CD, not by Steve. Get that garbage off the radio. Buzz remembers the song now, after hearing the last line of the song. Once you hear that it's hard to forget. |
| 6:39
| Steve wants to talk that song up again. He's already going to have to discuss this with Todd after the show since it's not part of the station's 80s core. Steve doesn't want him hitting the post to be loose. |
| 6:40
| There's just that little piece right at the end of the intro. A hack would leave that hanging but Steve can't do it so he's going to try again. |
| 6:41
| Back in the day you couldn't really say what you felt about that song. You'd have to say that the song was touching and you'd be crying during it. |
| 6:42
| Caller John has this song on a record compilation, he got it when he was 10. The full name of the song is The Last Game of the Season (A Blind Man in the Bleachers) by David Geddes. |
| 6:43
| It's like a musical version of We Are Marshall, which Steve saw over the weekend. He has to admit he got a little weepy while watching it and he's glad no one was around to see it. Even the dogs couldn't believe he was getting weepy. |
| 6:44
| The compilation also has Get Up and Boogie, into Smoke on the Water, then the theme from S.W.A.T., Jackie Blue and Cats in the Cradle. The bleacher song has a Harry Chapin feel to it, it's a story song. |
| 6:45
| Good for John but he needs to throw that compilation out. Steve doesn't care if it was the first LP he ever got. |
| 6:46
| Caller Carlton is wondering who wrote that song, he never wants to hear it again. Don't worry, Steve will never play it again. |
| 6:47
| Actually the song was written by a guy named Wipple. Who would record that song if they didn't write it? |
| 6:48
| Caller John loves the show, he's glad Steve and Buzz are on Chicago radio. Let's just end the call right there OK? |
| 6:49
| John would love to hear Steve talk up Black Betty. Did Brendan even know that song when he was screening the call? |
| 6:50
| Turns out Black Betty is on the Jack playlist, even though it's not part of Jack's 80s core. Todd doesn't like the 70s, he might have been pantsed during that decade. Somewhere in Todd there's a nerd but he has since got it together and now he's a swinging metrosexual. |
| 6:57
| Steve's not sure he can talk up Black Betty because it was a request. We're not supposed to take requests on Jack, we just play what we want. |
| 6:58
| If Steve wanted to play the song he could talk it up but he's not sure if he wants to. Buzz would like to hear Steve talk it up but he doesn't really like the song. |
| 6:59
| We don't have to hear the entire song right? Buzz has heard the song so many times but when Steve talks it up he sets up the rock and you want to keep rockin'. |
| 7:00
| Todd wouldn't even know what to do with his rotation if Steve just talked this song up all morning. Plus it's a request! |
| 7:01
| Does Buzz want Steve to do it again? The show log is going to be kind of boring because it'll just say "Steve talks up Black Betty again" over and over. |
| 7:02
| Steve didn't get right up to the vocals on Black Betty but in that song it calls for that. All of the songs in the Jack library tell you how much time is in the intro but Steve is not looking at that. |
| 7:03
| It would be really easy to be a top 40 DJ these days since all of the songs are on computer. Of course only the weak would look at those intros. |
| 7:04
| Caller Julanne just recently started listening to Steve and Buzz and they crack her up in the morning. How did Julanne find them? |
| 7:05
| Julanne used to have Sirius but her husband got rid of it. Was it because it was too serious? So Julanne started listening to Steve and Buzz after that. |
| 7:06
| Julanne moved to Chicago from Vegas a few years ago and she's still not used to the weather. She sold her house at the right time though, Steve just saw how housing prices in Vegas are way down. Steve's thinking of buying a place out there, he's sure he won't run into any temptations. |
| 7:07
| Caller Patti has a baby crying in the background. That is not Steve's kid if that's what she's calling about. Those are actually Pat's twins. But what about her kids? |
| 7:08
| Patti was wondering if Steve could talk up Terry Jacks' Seasons in the Sun. She read on Wikipedia that the guy who wrote it was going to have The Beach Boys perform it but they didn't. So the Terry Jacks version is even lighter than it previously was. |
| 7:09
| Steve's not sure if he has that song available to him. Patti can't believe it was a #1 song. Steve probably played it every 90 minutes. Steve is pretty sure that the poet Jacques Brel wrote the song and he knows that off the top of his head. |
| 7:10
| Buzz is pretty sure that Brel also knew or worked with Bob Dylan. Patti has heard a cover of the song by Kurt Cobain if you can believe that. Steve doesn't have it but he'll look for it. He can't do that now while talking to Patti and looking for a connection between Brel and Bob Dylan. |
| 7:11
| How old are Patti's twins? Does she whip 'em both out at the same time to feed her kids? Is that too personal of a question? Steve should probably move on for this because he's going to keep asking and Patti won't answer. |
| 7:12
| Live read: Illinois Back |
| 7:13
| Steve and Buzz don't have spines so they don't qualify for this procedure. Not having a spine is helpful if you work in radio though. |
| 7:14
| Maybe Joe Crede should get this procedure done since he has back problems. Maybe Kerry Wood had it done last week. |
| 7:20
| Steve does have the Terry Jacks song which he will talk up for that lady since he was so forward about the breast feeding. Steve was just so fascinated by the whole thing. |
| 7:21
| As a licensed OB/GYN in several Central and South American countries Steve has a curiosity about that kind of stuff. |
| 7:22
| Caller Brandy, she's a fine girl, what a good wife she would be. But Steve's life, his lover, his lady is the sea. Brandy's a new listener, we have a song for every new listener. Every time a new listener calls in Buzz is holding up cue cards for the song. They all say "STOP!" |
| 7:23
| Brandy's husband is a veteran of Disco Demolition and he told her she had to listen, just because of stuff like this. He was right too, the show makes her ride to work go much faster. |
| 7:24
| Today is Brandy's birthday, she's welcome to come down for the customary birthday spankings in a special room up in the office. She can sweep it for cameras before it starts if she wants. |
| 7:25
| Live read: Chicago White Sox |
| 7:26
| The White Sox are getting ready to announce their 25-man roster but they have made a few roster changes. |
| 7:27
| Steve's just going to talk this Terry Jacks song up for caller Patti and then he'll be done with this. |
| 7:28
| There's not much room in the beginning of the song and Steve got cocky and messed up. |
| 7:29
| Steve is not going to play the full song though, he's done with this. He played that song 4 times for every shift he did. It's a horrific song but that didn't stop them from making Steve play it every 90 minutes. |
| 7:30
| We need to do the web but Steve is going to do the web poll first. He knows Buzz likes to do the web poll first but we can do the news if he wants. |
| 7:31
| Steve's pretty sure the Sox haven't decided on their 25-man roster but they did make some announcements like Joe Crede starting at third. No one here is a Sox fan though and Pat Boyle is on his second vacation in a month. |
| 7:32
| Yesterday's web poll question was "is it OK for a man to have long hair?" 74% of the people said no. Today's web poll question is "have you ever been to Crobar?" Steve's never been but he wouldn't mind going on and running into some hot chicks on X. Buzz would go if he knew Dennis Rodman was going to be there. That would be reason enough for Steve to stay away. |
| 7:33
| This article is from Timeout Chicago which is a worthless publication. When Steve and Garry did that Gilda's Club thing last year they were interviewed by some bitch from Timeout Chicago who said the whole Gilda's Club thing was a stupid idea. |
| 7:34
| She just wanted Steve to break bad on Garry but he had no reason to do that. Then when it finally came out it was a short blurb that could have been written off the press release for the event. |
| 7:35
| Steve can't believe they charge money for this magazine either. This was written by Tara Conner who went to Crobar the other night with her best friend Lucy. They were dressed to impress and impress they did. There were people drinking and it was nice there. Buzz can't believe it really says that. |
| 7:36
| This was written by Tara Conner, who was that Miss USA contestant. This magazine is owned by Donald Trump so that explains it. Do we really need that haircut passing for a man in Chicago, telling us what to do with our fire code? |
| 7:37
| Tara and her friend Lucy drank appletinis and couldn't believe how tan they looked in Chicago in the winter. They liked it. |
| 7:38
| At one point a song was playing with a great rhythm so Lucy and Tara looked at each other and said "we should be dancing" and they did. There were people dressed nicely on the dance floor, some smiling, some looking serious. |
| 7:39
| They mostly danced with each other because they liked the rhythm and new it would attract guys. They are correct about that. Lucy met a guy so Tara told her "Go be with that guy." Steve's pretty sure this isn't a joke. |
| 7:40
| No one recognized Tara as Miss USA which would have hurt her feelings if she wasn't feeling so nice. Someone asked her how she got so tan. Then she got another drink that tasted like apples dipped in alcohol. Didn't this girl go to rehab? Should she be drinking? |
| 7:41
| After that Tara went into the bathroom which was so nice and white. After a while the lights got darker and she sat on a barstool with nice padding. This can't be real, it has to be from The Onion or something. |
| 7:42
| This just once again proves how worthless Timeout Chicago is. Is it possible Trump bought the magazine? |
| 7:43
| Buzz thought that Timeout Chicago was something like a franchise magazine with one in every city. |
| 7:44
| Steve has never been to Crobar, why would he? He doesn't drink, he doesn't dance and he's married. He does like a nice bathroom though. |
| 7:49
| Steve has it all figured out. Donald Trump didn't buy Timeout Chicago, it's an April Fools prank. Of course they're assuming people care that much about Timeout Chicago. |
| 7:50
| According to Phil Rosenthal Crain's Chicago bought the prank and reported it. That article could have been written by Tara Conner, she seems dumb as hell. |
| 7:51
| Timeout Chicago could benefit from being bought by Donald Trump though. It's just a magazine for people to advertise in if they can't afford The Reader. It doesn't even qualify as bird cage liner. |
| 7:52
| Live read: Townstone Financial |
| 7:53
| Clint and Virginia have racked up a lot of credit card deb because of 17 high interest credit cards. |
| 7:54
| Earlier in the week, either Monday or Tuesday there was a guy blaming Steve having too many credit cards for the credit crunch. Steve can't remember which day though because everyday day actually feels like two days. Steve's not complaining though. |
| 7:55
| Doing mornings makes every day feel like two. You've got the first day doing the show and then the other today after the show in the afternoon. Steve likes it though but as a result he can't remember which day he read that letter. |
| 7:56
| Does Buzz want to do the news? Steve likes to wait until 8 but then he'll want to do the Eight O'Clock Taco Bell. Steve does have an email he could read if Buzz doesn't mind. Yesterday Steve and Buzz were talking about those buttons in their cars that allow you to shift gears in an automatic car. He knows what they're actually used for. |
| 7:57
| Emailer Cal says the shift button is good for downshifting but not really upshifting. When race car drivers go into a turn they downshift so they can come out of the turn with more torque. Doing that with a clutch takes a special kind of foot movement. |
| 7:58
| So Buzz should keep that in mind the next time he goes into a turn. Steve ends up racing a lot of people on the way to work every morning. He's not sure if they're drunk or just trying to get their edge but it always helps Steve get his edge. |
| 7:59
| So Buzz is basically driving a stock car. He's like Buzz Earnhardt Jr. |
| 8:00
| Cal is a listener in San Francisco and a podcast subscriber. Of all the podcasts he subscribes to like Adam Corolla and Kevin & Bean Steve's show is the only one he doesn't delete. |
| 8:01
| Todd always tells Steve about Kevin & Bean, he says they draw a lot of young listeners for old guys. He says that right to Steve's face too. Kevin & Bean play alternative music and they act like they're in their 20s. |
| 8:02
| San Francisco has a spectacular Chinatown and as Buzz knows Steve loves Chinatowns. He might go to Chicago's Chinatown today. |
| 8:03
| Steve did not get to Greektown yesterday because he some people coming over to the house. And he thought it would be a mistake to go down there at 6:30. He'd probably end up with a belly dancer doing shots. |
| 8:04
| It's time now for the Eight O'Clock Taco Bell. Today being Wednesday means it's Sauce Packet Wednesday. In honor of Buzz today's sauce packet saying is "Devil Duster Hot Sauce." |
| 8:05
| News with Buzz |
| 8:06
| Hillary Clinton is saying that Jeremiah Wright would not have been her pastor after the things he said about this country. Of course now she's just trying to take all the attention away from the Bosnia gaffe. |
| 8:07
| Can Buzz not comment on that because he's doing the news. Steve thinks it's commendable that Obama isn't just disowning his pastor. |
| 8:08
| Meanwhile Chelsea has words to anyone with questions about the Monica Lewinsky scandal. She was at a campaign stop at Butler University. Steve does not like Chelsea's mic technique, she needs to back off that thing a bit. |
| 8:09
| It does seem inappropriate to ask her about Lewinsky though, 12 years later. It was sort of made our business though wasn't it? C'mon, it's The Big Lewinsky! |
| 8:10
| Is Buzz making an audition tape or something, is that why he won't comment on anything? He's just going to cut Steve out of all of this and use it to get a new job. Steve just wanted to say The Big Lewinsky, his goal is to entertain. |
| 8:11
| We've now learned that Brad Pitt is a distant relation of Barack Obama and Angelina Jolie is distantly related to Hillary Clinton. |
| 8:12
| Meanwhile Hugo Chavez has said that a McCain presidency will further strain relations between the U.S. and Venezuela. We need to take that country over and get at that oil. It's right in our backyard! We could install Ozzie as president, how great would that be? |
| 8:13
| Going back to that Jeremiah Wright stuff, Steve's not saying he's for Obama or Hillary or McCain, but the reason people go to church is for religion. Whatever the pastor says is just to make you think isn't it? |
| 8:14
| It seems like there are more important things to worry about than what church Barack Obama goes to and what his crazy pastor is saying. Steve does have to say that Hillary saying she landed in Bosnia under sniper fire seems like a bigger deal. |
| 8:15
| That Howard Dean was knocked out of the 2004 campaign after that whole yelling thing at a campaign stop. That was insane but it's also insane to say you were under sniper fire in Bosnia. Hillary wasn't yelling about it like Howard Dean though, probably because she knows how to keep a lid on things. That's from her years with Bill Clinton. |
| 8:16
| Last week John McCain kept saying that Al Qaeda was training terrorists in Iran and sending them into Iraq. He kept getting corrected by Joe Lieberman although Steve didn't get what the big deal was. Turns out they're talking about different kinds of Muslims. It doesn't make McCain look good though, it's sort of a senior moment. |
| 8:17
| An 11-year old Wisconsin girl with diabetes died after her parents prayed for her instead of getting her medical attention. |
| 8:18
| Washington authorities have recovered a buried parachute that could have been used by hijacker D.B. Cooper. Steve doesn't know why he doesn't care about D.B. Cooper. It's been on a lot of TV shows though. Buzz thinks people are interested just because it's a historical loose end. |
| 8:19
| An Oregon man claiming he's 5 months pregnant is being met with some disbelief. Really?! |
| 8:27
| Live read: The Little Guys |
| 8:28
| Bob and Ron are here for another Wake & Bake Wednesday. They are woken and boken. What time do a Bob and Ron get up in the morning? |
| 8:29
| Bob was up at 5:40 but he's got a new puppy so he needs to wear it out before he leaves for the day. They don't want dogs in the morning though. |
| 8:30
| Bob and Ron are only up early on Wednesday to get down here for the show. Bob gets up at 5:40 to get down here? They get in at 7:20 to do the prep work and pre-interview with Mary. That's bad time management. |
| 8:31
| Plus they don't call it Wake & Bake Wednesday for nothing. Steve's home alone all week, he was thinking of getting some pot. He doesn't want Bob and Ron showing up though, he's just kidding. |
| 8:32
| Wouldn't it be funny if Steve was smoking pot this week though? Actually yesterday Steve spent the afternoon trying to figure out who his date to the Hawks game would be. Turns out they're not even in town tonight. He was told that several times but he still made plans. |
| 8:33
| Steve was trying to decide who to take and his neighbors invited him to dinner. Now they're going to think he was lying when he said he couldn't come. Steve called Stephanie to get reservations at the Ketel One club and he decided to take Mike. He even went along with it until he figured out there was no game. So maybe Steve doesn't need any pot. |
| 8:34
| The neighbor's son works for the Tribune website in their sports department so now they're definitely going to know he's lying. Steve was really excited about going to the game too. Imagine how it felt when he found out he'd have to drive to Columbus to see the game. |
| 8:35
| So what time do Bob and Ron normally wake up? Ron usually rolls out of bed around 9 but neither of them walk dogs in the morning. They walk dogs in the afternoons when their owners are at work. |
| 8:36
| Dogs can hold it for a long time though once they're older. Bob and Ron won't admit that though. They don't think people can trust Steve, here's a guy who used to keep his kid in an overturned playpen with books on top. |
| 8:37
| One of Steve's dogs left him a little surprise when he got home yesterday. He can't figure out who did it although they might have teamed up so neither would get in trouble. It's always embarrassing to be outsmarted by dogs and they do it on a regular basis to Steve. |
| 8:38
| Alright on to the rock history. This week in 1973 a very bizarre incident occurred at a Lou Reed show. |
| 8:39
| This week in 1979 David Crosby was driving on the San Diego freeway when he slipped into a drug-induced slumber and crashed into the center. Police found a quantity of coke in his car. You'd think he wouldn't fall asleep if he had access to coke. If you have it, do it. He also has a gun which he bought after John Lennon was shot. |
| 8:40
| Also this week we celebrate the birthday of singer/songwriter/producer Nick Lowe. Bob and Ron have selected So It Goes by Nick Lowe which Steve has never heard of. They feel he'll recognize it once he hears it. |
| 8:41
| Steve doesn't know that song, does Buzz? Bob and Ron need to leave their fetishes at home. Can't they go with a Lou Reed song? Because Steve's the one who has to answer for this song after the show. The biggest thing Bob and Ron have to worry about for the rest of the day is which key goes to which person's house on their dogwalking route. |
| 8:42
| Now that Steve hears some more of that song he does recognize it. Bob and Ron know Steve better than he knows himself. |
| 8:43
| Caller Dave has a correction for Bob and Ron. They said Crosby crashed his car in 1979 and there was a gun in the car which he bought after Lennon was shot. Lennon was shot in 1980. |
| 8:44
| Steve did not give Dave a prize, he didn't like his smug attitude. That guy seemed like one of those internet people. |
| 8:45
| Song: So It Goes, Nick Lowe |
| 8:48
| Steve does know that song and he likes it but not as much as the other options. It was the shortest song which Steve thought was the best option to get them both out of here as quickly as possible. |
| 8:49
| It's always good to hear from Bob and Ron isn't it? It makes you feel better about yourself. |
| 8:53
| That's a drop from The New Adventures of Old Christine, which is funny. It is back on now that the strike is over. Steve likes that Two & a Half Men too, good casting on that one. |
| 8:54
| It's time for Buzz's little friend to stop by, Ben Gay. He's not so little though is he Buzz? Ben is here again because Pat Boyle is on vacation this week. It's his second vacation in a month, probably why he's still on cable. |
| 8:55
| Ben is like the gay Les Grobstein although he has better credentials than Les. Ben is trying to start up an all-gay sports network but so far there's not a lot of programming. Most of your professional athletes don't want to come out. |
| 8:56
| Ben also tried to open a gay sports bar, that didn't really take off either. There are a lot of gay men that like sports but not as much as they like sex. He should have put the TVs in the bathroom stalls. |
| 8:57
| The location of the bar wasn't great either, it was in Wheaton. Ben thought becuase of Cream of Wheaton that they were more open-minded. But they're pretty religious out there and until recently it was a dry town. |
| 8:58
| On to the sports. An MRI revealed a slight tear to Jerry Owens' right adductor. That means he'll start the season on the DL and Brian Anderson and Carlos Quentin will share the bulk of the playing time in center. Steve thinks that Carlos Quentin guy will be the starter. He'll make a great White Sock. |
| 8:59
| Ben has heard of the abductor but this says adductor. Is that the same thing? Jerry says his groin is not in the right place but who's is? |
| 9:00
| The Cubs signed outfielder Reed Johnson to a 1-year contract, he'll back up Felix Pie in center. |
| 9:01
| Several other teams were interested in Johnson but he really wanted to play for the Cubs. Negotiations on the contract took only 10 minutes. |
| 9:02
| The Blackhawks are in Columbus tonight, not Chicago as some people expected. Nikolai Khabibulin will start at goal. |
| 9:03
| The Bulls beat the Atlanta Hawks last night and are now 2 games out of the playoffs in the 11th spot. |
| 9:04
| With 10 assists in Saturdays loss to the Pacers Kirk Hinrich passed GM John Paxson for 5th among franchise leaders. He still trains Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Norm Van Lier and Reggie Theus. |
| 9:05
| Brendan's delete key doesn't work on his computer? He couldn't take this story out? Assists? Who cares?! Whatever. |
| 9:06
| The April issue of Vogue with LeBron James and Giselle Bundchen has been criticized as racially insensitive by some people. James is showing off his game face, dribbling with one hand and holding Giselle with another. Some believe the image screams "King Kong" |
| 9:07
| The son of former NHL goalie Patrick Roy apologized for giving the finger to the crowd at a Quebec junior hockey league game, after he beat up the opposing team's goalie. |
| 9:08
| Center Jonathan Roy gave the finger to...Ben can't even pronounce the name of this team. He's giving Brendan a 5 minute head start to get completely out of the downtown area. |
| 9:09
| Ben was told Brendan wrote "a little Ben Gay". This is a 2 hour report with a bunch of crap he doesn't care about. Maybe Brendan knows how to pronounce the team name? |
| 9:10
| Jose Canseco claims in his new book that he introduced Alex Rodriguez to a steroids distributor. Jose Canseco is quite prolific isn't he? |
| 9:17
| Something unprecedented and startling was happening in the studio during the break. Chef Hans is here as well. Steve calls down to the newsroom. |
| 9:18
| Jim kid is normally Mr. Cubs Ticket Lottery guy. All you hear about is his number and place in line, his sleeping bag situation, his hot chocolate. But this year we heard nothing. So Steve has to wonder if Jim kid no longer cares about going to games. |
| 9:19
| Jim still cares about going to Cubs games but he didn't do the lottery this year. Ticket sales start at 8 am but you have to be in line at 6 am. In year's past he was working in the afternoons. |
| 9:20
| There's plenty of room on the Southside and Steve has tickets to 81 games. Jim is still a Cubs fan and he'll still be going to games. Is Jim blaming this more on the new schedule and not on the fact that he's lost interest because they almost won? |
| 9:21
| Jim's not blaming it on anything. Steve is though, he's blaming it on something. Was being swept by the Diamondbacks not enough to keep Jim interested? Jim said there are still tickets available for April but it's very cold. |
| 9:22
| Pete is very disappointed to hear this from Jim though. Jim has talked about this with Pete, he didn't know he was disappointed. This is showbiz, he's probably not really disappointed. This isn't Jim's own personal reality show. Steve likes the angle of Jim thinking Pete sold him out. |
| 9:23
| Pete and Jim have talked about going to Cubs games in April then? They talk about the Cubs for about an hour everyday. Steve could have sent someone to be in the lottery for Jim. Adam's bossy enough, he could have got right up to the front of the line with seats right behind home plate. |
| 9:24
| Pete's favorite thing is when he's standing in the doorway of Jim's office talking and then Adam chimes in with a comment about the Cubs or whatever they're discussing. Adam? Doesn't Pete mean The Judge from The Natural. He's sitting in there all morning with the lights off. |
| 9:25
| Yesterday Pete and Jim were talking about CSI and Jim complained about no CSI: Chicago since Gary Sinise is from here. Then Adam chimed in that the cop show was invented in Chicago. He must have been referring to Hill Street Blues. But before that Dragnet was in L.A. and Adam-12 too. Hill Street Blues reinvented the cop show, it was the first modern cop show. It wasn't filmed here except for the exteriors and we made a big ass deal about it like a bunch of hicks. |
| 9:26
| In case Steve didn't know, Johnny Depp is going to be in Aurora filming a movie. Steve can't believe that's a lead story on the news. They were talking to people who met him! We're a bunch of idiots! |
| 9:27
| So Jim and Pete talk about the Cubs. Jim has expressed that he's available in the afternoons now so he can just go get day-of-game tickets. He needs to say that though so it seems less depressing. We don't need to hear about our little fella giving up on everything. |
| 9:28
| Jim is going to his first game on April 5th but that's a rooftop. Is that with Steve's rooftop hook-up? Is it someone named Lawrence? Steve thought Jim didn't go to games in April. Jim's paying full price for the tickets, it's for his brother's bachelor party. Why did he do that, Steve could have probably hooked him up. |
| 9:29
| Does Jim know that Ed has tickets available? He has 6 games from a friend who sells some of his season tickets. Each game is $135 for a pair of tickets, that's face value, no mark ups to his friends. They're in section 138, row 1, that's Foul Ball City. Has Chef ever sat there? Chef's Ed impersonation is right on isn't it? |
| 9:30
| $135 might be a bit much for Jim. What are the cheapest seats up there? Jim can't say for sure because different games are in different pricing structures. Seriously? Those guys are getting away with armed robbery up there. They charge more for the good games. Do the Sox do that and Steve just doesn't notice. He might have seen a Sox schedule with the same pricing structure. |
| 9:31
| Steve can't believe baseball has the audacity to do that. They're admitting that half the games suck but when the Yankees come to town you're going to pay through the nose for tickets. |
| 9:32
| Caller Mick is a Sox fan and has some Cubs tickets in April and May and Jim can have them. Jim doesn't go in April unless it's for a bachelor party. Is there going to be a stripper at the bachelor party? How about a whore? Steve can arrange something, how great would that be? Baseball and a whore! |
| 9:33
| Mick has the tickets in front of him, the seats for April are $16 and the same seats in May are $26. Steve's pretty sure the Sox do that too. He was looking at the schedule to choose the games he wanted and he chose all the dark green games. |
| 9:34
| Mick says Jim can have the Cubs tickets for free, he won't go. How about Mick gives them to Steve and Steve resells them to Jim? He'd double the cost and the whores would be additional. Whores on a rooftop, that would be nice. Lawrence wouldn't allow that, they're on the up-and-up. He invited Steve to a game but didn't think he'd want to go. Steve's not opposed to that but he's not going to a Jim kid sausage fest. |
| 9:35
| Last year Pete and Jim went to a playoff game without Steve. He had to sit at Pat's in-laws house gluing doilies into paper bags for the wedding. You couldn't even see them which Steve predicted. He wants his glue back and a pristine glue gun and his 3 hours back. |
| 9:36
| Mick will give Brendan his number off the air for Jim to call about the tickets. Mick imagines that by August they'll be giving Cubs tickets. Steve doesn't think they'll ever do that. Maybe for the Sox but not the Cubs. And they had a pretty good team last year. |
| 9:37
| Mick is in Crown Point where they're also filming the Johnny Depp movie. Mick will probably be on TV tonight, it's the lead story. Does the headline say "Little Shrimpy Greaseball in Crown Point?" Steve likes Johnny Depp but who cares if he's in town? We're a bunch of hicks here. |
| 9:38
| Steve doesn't really feel like he got to the bottom of all that but doesn't it really matter? Somehow Pete and Jim got free Cubs tickets out of it. And Mick couldn't get off the phone quick enough. He probably didn't want to be part of all the Johnny Depp bashing in case he ran into him. |
| 9:39
| Live read: Joebees |
| 9:40
| Joe Bee is here, who's Buzz's little friend sitting next to him? |
| 9:41
| Does Buzz want to see the stinger again? Hans heard Buzz takes it everyday. That's the bee pollen he's talking about. There was sort of a crossover of concepts. |
| 9:48
| Live read: Seattle Sutton |
| 9:49
| Chef Hans is here for Meat Talk. What's his sign-on? His sign-off is aufweiner schnitzel. |
| 9:50
| Yesterday Hans did a cooking class for Gilda's Class. Steve thought he already knew how to cook. He was actually teaching a class. |
| 9:51
| Hans taught a group of cancer survivors and cancer sufferers. He showed them how to make a mushroom goulash and steak au povoir. Steve knows Buzz will want to run right home and make the wild mushroom goulash so Steve will give the recipe to him. |
| 9:52
| Hans used to do a lot of mushrooms in Switzerland, he put them right on toast. Buzz has done his fair share of mushrooms. |
| 9:53
| Steve loves mushrooms. Why doesn't Hans just make it and Steve will come to the restaurant and eat it, that seems easier. |
| 9:54
| Hans heard Steve and Buzz talking about ham last week. That was when Buzz first learned that ham is a traditional easter meal. |
| 9:55
| Hans prepares the ham bone-in and then removes it prior to serving. Hans uses brown sugar glaze with gloves and then puts pineapple in the bottom. Hans brought some ham sandwiches so they can sample it. |
| 9:56
| Buzz has noticed that whenever there is pineapple around and it doesn't get out of the kitchen it stinks the kitchen up. That's because it has sugar and starts to ferment. |
| 9:57
| Buzz is thinking of getting a Mustang. When Matt Dahl bought his new car, a Ford, Steve was at the dealership with him. While Matt was trying to establish his credit Steve spent a lot of time in the showroom. |
| 9:58
| Steve sat in several Mustangs pretending he was Steve McQueen. Buzz just has to decide if he wants a Mustang or another Grand Prix? There's no question in Steve's mind, Mustang wins out. |
| 9:59
| The Mustang is back to the old 60s body style. It sort of used to be a chick car and that SHO engine was too much for some of the dudes driving it. |
| 10:00
| Jack FM's sister station, The Score, is at S & W for a live remote over lunch. That would be Murph, Mully and Hanley. Hans hates to say but it's all sold out too. Sold out? They sell tickets? Wait a second, Steve needs to get his notepad out. |
| 10:01
| Hans just meant that all the reservations were gone. People had to make a reservation and then will choose from one of two lunch options. The Score has a lot of deadbeat listeners, what if they don't get the lunch? |
| 10:02
| Bruce Weber is one of their guests today. He has a lot to talk about coming off of that great season. Maybe it's a Bruce Weber roast. |
| 10:03
| Hans was disappointed that he didn't see Steve at the Hawks game on Sunday. Steve looked for him but never saw him. Is Hans going to the right section? |
| 10:04
| Dale Tallon told Hans he'd love to come on the show whenever Steve wants him. Steve would have him on, how about tomorrow? |
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