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| 5:33
| Good morning everyone! Buzz Kilman is making his way into position in the news turret. Before the song ended Buzz was questioning the masculinity of the Styx song on Jack, Fooling Yourself. Steve couldn't agree more. |
| 5:34
| Then of course that song went into Fleetwood Mac's Don't Stop, a song that made Steve question the masculinity of his sons. Janet made all three boys join the show choir which required them to wear spangly vests and bow ties and sing that song. |
| 5:35
| Buzz thought Mike really took to the show choir, is he mistaken? They'd perform songs like Don't Stop and dance on stage, which is fine. Steve would rather go to a sporting even though. Every time before a concert there was a big commotion in the house because someone couldn't find their spangly vest or spangly bow tie. |
| 5:36
| Buzz remembers going on vacation with his older cousin, who was a strapping older teenager. He knew all the show tunes and at this bar they were hanging out at, in Biminy, people would gather around the piano and sing show tunes. |
| 5:37
| Buzz's cousin could always join in and sometimes lead the singing. And the women were lining up with him. Turns out he was gay so it wasn't really working for him but at the time Buzz couldn't believe how many women he was getting. |
| 5:38
| As far as Steve knows his boys aren't gay but if they were he wouldn't care. Some of the guys who were in the show choir with them ended up being gay. Buzz doesn't think show tunes can make you gay though. |
| 5:39
| All three boys did a choreographed dance to Don't Stop which Steve could probably do right now from memory. Steve found he was better off just saying how great the performance was instead of arguing about it. |
| 5:40
| Caller Anthony doesn't have to call Steve Mr. Dahl. He thinks the singing benefited Mike since they went to college together. In that case Anthony should call him Mr. Dahl. If you're a friend of one of the boys Steve prefers Mr. Dahl. Pat has a Hollywood friend who calls him Steve and it drives him nuts. |
| 5:41
| Anthony was in Mike's frat and then lived with him senior year in that mold-ridden place. It wasn't as bad as the frat house though. Steve and Janet actually went to the frat house and were dry-heaving. |
| 5:42
| The guys in the frat had to serenade sorority girls to get them to come to their dances and parties. Mike always took the lead on that, singing and playing guitar. |
| 5:43
| Janet's cousin's husband worked as a distributor for Corona too so Mike always got hooked up with festive signs for their annual Jimmy Buffett-themed parties. |
| 5:44
| The funniest thing Mike has done lately is whenever one of the promos he put together runs on Comcast he calls it a "Mike Dahl joint". |
| 5:45
| What was the name of Mike's frat? It was Delta Upsilon and it was a really funky house. The living room was bad and the bedrooms were even worse. |
| 5:46
| Anthony has won tickets to see Counting Crows. Why does Steve imagine him in the pavilion area yelling "MR. JONES AND ME! C'MON YOU MOTHERS!" |
| 5:47
| It's funny to think of Mike Dahl out there workin' the sorority girls. Steve didn't even know he played guitar. |
| 5:52
| Speaking of Jimmy Buffett, we were giving away tickets to see him at Toyota Park. Maybe not today but at some point we were. Steve's just trying to make it big time, like we have a huge prize closet. |
| 5:53
| There are a lot of concert giveaways on the wheel because we're your concert connection, The Jacker! We have yet to give away the George Michael tickets but that's coming up too. |
| 5:54
| Steve is calling for someone to put a stop to the Brant Miller onslaught. It's bad enough that he's all over the place with his forecast because of the bad weather we're having. He's on TV, he's in the Sun-Times, he was featured at the Hawks game last night! Why does Steve need the weather forecast at the Hawks game? First of all, the day is over and second, it's not like he has a change of clothes with him. |
| 5:55
| Then Steve finds out he's going to have a morning radio show? And he threw out the first pitch at the Cubs game yesterday! He's a nice enough guy but he doesn't have the talent to be spread around this much. |
| 5:56
| His wife is an agent so she's getting him all of this work. Maybe she just wants him out of the house? Brant's wife did once tell Janet that Steve should aspire to be more than just a radio host. |
| 5:57
| Someone needs to make it stop though. Steve's just sitting there at the hockey game, minding his own business and he looks up at the scoreboard to see a highlight. Instead he sees Brant Miller's 5-day forecast. He's also at Bears games and he'll probably be at Sox games too. |
| 5:58
| Yesterday at the Cubs game after he threw out the first pitch they put up a big wood carving of Brant's 5-day forecast since they don't have the video screens up there. It was very nice actually. But someone has to make all this stop. |
| 5:59
| This isn't sour grapes either, it's not like Steve wants to be all over the place. Although he wouldn't mind if this company bought some TV ads instead of just buying ads for The Douche. |
| 6:00
| Steve did have a high level of recognition at the Hawks game last night and everyone was really nice. It was mostly female fans too which Steve pointed out to Matt Dahl. |
| 6:01
| Buzz thinks that the women have a high level of attraction of sports where men are beating up other men. Steve has to say that hockey is probably the manliest sport. |
| 6:02
| Someone sent Buzz a video of a hockey player who kept coming back onto the ice, even with his shirt off, to continue a fight. That was Steve, it was the Stu Grimson fight. Periodically Steve's going to send Buzz fight videos like that. |
| 6:03
| Steve has some more Brant Miller...is it overkill? Abuse? Brant is never going to overtake the Dean of Chicago Weather, Tommy Skilling. And right after Tommy is Jerry Taft. |
| 6:04
| Caller Kevin was filling up his gas tank on Monday, he looks up at a video screen on the pump and there's Brant giving his 5-day forecast. Plus it was out-of-date because it showed the weekend forecast for Monday morning. It's usually wrong too which makes it all the more sweet. |
| 6:05
| Steve had a conversation with Todd Cavanah after the show yesterday because some callers are winning too much. Kevin hasn't won in 5 years though. Some people have been winning way too much. Some guy won the bonus prize 2 in a couple of weeks. We can't give $2400 to one person. |
| 6:06
| So sometimes if you're giving Brendan all of your info you'll have to tell the truth about the last time you won. And you might only get a t-shirt. |
| 6:07
| Sometimes callers tell Steve that they've recently won and don't need a prize. Then Steve tells them that he can do what he wants on his own show. So maybe he has some growing to do. He'll probably just let Brendan handle all the dirty work. |
| 6:08
| Steve stayed until the very end of the game last night, even thought it was 6-2 with a few minutes left. He wanted to see if there were any fights after the buzzer went off. |
| 6:09
| That caused Steve to get behind the leaving curve, plus he was hobbled by his leg injury so he was going a little slower. People were trying to stop and talk to Steve and he told them that he had to get out of there because of the 4 am wake-up. They seemed to understand but might have been disappointed. |
| 6:10
| Then as Steve is getting to the door some Red Wings fan and his fat-ass girlfriend cut him off. Steve almost got into it with this guy right there. These hockey games get your blood up though! Steve was ready to kill both of them. He was going to say "It's not my fault your girlfriend's fat ass can't fit through the door" but he backed off. |
| 6:11
| Steve ended up getting behind a slow mini-van on the Eisenhower and then some guy in a Camaro cut him off going 100. Steve was so jacked up from all of that that he didn't get to sleep until 1 am. If Steve didn't have to get up so early he'd probably be in jail right now. |
| 6:12
| Steve saw Dan McNeil at the game last night. He's benefited greatly from Steve and Buzz not being on in afternoons any more. He's a nice guy but he was hammered and seemed a bit leathery, like he smokes a lot. |
| 6:13
| He was giving Steve tips like "keep your eye on number 88" That would be Patrick Kane who will probably be rookie of the year. He also told him that Jonathan Toews was pretty good. Steve told him he liked that Adam Burish guy and Dan told him he should have him on his show. He did already! |
| 6:14
| It seems like those sports radio guys don't know any more than Steve does. Dan sat behind Steve at the World Series and he was probably in his seat for about an inning. The rest of the time he was up smoking. |
| 6:15
| Dan might be one of those guys who says mean stuff about Steve on the air like he's still a drunk. Steve gets reports on that stuff so he likes to go say hi to those people. |
| 6:16
| Steve had an exciting night at the game. He got a brat and some fries which in and of itself makes it a great night. They have great fries at the game, they put cheese and lime on them. Steve doesn't like to keep his food under the seat because he thinks there are rats down there. |
| 6:17
| There probably aren't rats but there should be. If Steve were a rat that's where he'd be. There used to be rats in the Chicago Stadium, maybe they moved over when they opened the new place. |
| 6:18
| Steve has met a lot of fans at the game and they all seem to like mornings. He runs into a lot of dudes in the bathroom and he doesn't mind shaking their hands but not until after both people have washed their hands. You can't shake hands before washing your hands, that's almost like having sex. |
| 6:23
| That's Brant Miller talking about the first pitch he threw out. Steve didn't see the first pitch but Pete saw it. It was low and outside if you're a left-handed batter. He throws like a woman, which is an insult to girls. There are many fine female athletes. Jenny Finch doesn't throw like a woman. |
| 6:24
| It was a bad pitch, nothing like the strike Steve threw to Esteban Loiza. Pete felt bad for Brant in a way. If you know you can't throw, why would you agree to throw out the first pitch? |
| 6:25
| For 2 weeks before Steve threw out the first pitch he went to the White Sox academy and threw off a regulation pitching mound. Pete thinks that Steve would have been able to at least throw the ball over the plate even if he hadn't practiced. |
| 6:26
| Steve and Pete were Dahldoes and Steve wouldn't mind doing that again. The new schedule makes it easier to do the early evening games. Steve's only playing 12" though, he's a musician and he needs his fingers. What if he decides to jam with The Nadas again? How can he throw down a solo during Buzz's song? |
| 6:27
| Brant kept bragging about how his throw was over the plate and then he took down some little kid who also threw the first pitch out. He said the kid almost made it over the plate. Half of the 5 pm and 6 pm news was about Brant's first pitch. |
| 6:28
| Is Steve missing something here with Brant Miller? It seems like he's in line to be the next Jim Belushi for this city. |
| 6:29
| Caller Jim has heard Dan McNeil make some comments about Steve on the air but on Monday they were talking about the Ernie Banks statue and they all said if one broadcaster deserved a statue it was Steve. He doesn't want to start a radio war here. Steve was a drunk. He doesn't want this to escalate or anything. |
| 6:30
| Caller Eric is out in Lake in the Hills where there isn't really a lake as much as a pond. There are hills though but they're more like mounds. Eric listens to Dan McNeil in the afternoons because here's not much else on. Let's go podcast people! |
| 6:31
| Eric wanted to let Steve know that Dan is afflicted with S.A.D. so he has a tanning booth in his house. That could explain the leathery appearance. Why do they all talk about Steve though? If Eric ever hears some listener call up and tell them that Steve's trying to start a war with them he should call in and defend him. |
| 6:32
| Steve recommends that Dan outsource his tanning. The best places are those places with the cute girls working there. Steve likes to think that they can't wait to see him naked and will open the blinds when he's undressing. |
| 6:33
| Steve likes Dan and he doesn't want to get into a whole thing with him. It was funny that he told Steve to check out #88. |
| 6:34
| Live read: Sport Clips |
| 6:35
| Steve's going to get a haircut at Sport Clips today. He figured it was a good time to go because he'll have a Sox game to watch. There are some photos of the girls who were at the St. Patrick's broadcast and the one giving Steve a massage is cracking up. |
| 6:36
| Steve wouldn't want that while they're cutting his hair though but maybe when he's getting the massage or hot towel treatment. They'd probably know to back away from the head if they started to laugh. |
| 6:37
| The Sox game starts at 11 and Steve's haircut is at 1 so he'll get there just in time to see their 3rd loss of the season. He can't say which location he's going to for security purposes though. |
| 6:38
| Steve's pretty sure some of the youngsters on the staff got their haircut at Sport Clips. Steve calls down to the newsroom. Jim got his haircut at Sport Clips a couple of weeks ago. Did he watch the Cubs game? It was actually before the season started so he watched the beginning of the NCAA tournament. They don't have name for that like Sweet 16 do they? |
| 6:39
| Jim got a great haircut at Sport Clips, he found his time to be enjoyable. He got the haircut, then they take you back to a darkened room that looks like a lockerroom for the shampoo and hot towel and then back to the chair for the massage. |
| 6:40
| Steve has a lot of emails, he might do a mailbag. He's got one from a guy complaining that the web streaming isn't working. It's only one guy although yesterday a lot of people said they couldn't get it working. |
| 6:41
| Steve calls down to Adam's office. He knows he's not in charge of this but he knows if something is going on. The web stream is still pretty messed up today. They say it's a company-wide issue. How does that happen? If the transmitter was down for a day heads would roll. |
| 6:42
| Dan Mason, the head of CBS radio, is in town today maybe Steve needs to talk to him. He wants to be there when the person in charge of the wed streaming gets fired. |
| 6:43
| Steve will cut them some slack on one day but 2 days in a row! Steve could put out a better web stream! He actually does put out a better web stream that's privately used by Mark Czerniec. That's so he doesn't have to hear the show on delay. |
| 6:44
| Steve had a meeting with Adam and Ed yesterday. Adam wants $150,000 to make the It's Too Early DVDs. Steve's not sure he wants to spend that much money for self-agrandization. |
| 6:45
| What if Steve set up a pre-order just to see how much interest there was in the DVDs. Then if there's enough interest he'll start making the DVDs. Steve needs to figure out the legalities of pre-ordering a product that doesn't exist and then not making the product and refunding the money if not enough people order it. |
| 6:46
| This is the problem with owning your own stuff. If someone else owned these shows they'd make a DVD and Steve would get a sweet royalty. Steve already lost money on this show, he doesn't want to go deeper into the hole. |
| 6:47
| Steve gets the feeling that Adam is not going to take no for an answer on this one although it's not his money. Steve would be glad to use Adam's credit card for the project though. |
| 6:52
| That's Brant Miller taking down a little kid on the news last night. By the way, a 4-seam fastball doesn't require you to hold the ball with 4 hands. That would be a change-up you moron. Why do they even let people like that grip a baseball?! |
| 6:53
| Buzz was watching the news last night and before cutting to break they teased Brant's first pitch. Before he completed the pitch they froze it and it left Brant in a very unflattering pose. He looked like an ostrich. |
| 6:54
| G-Reg sang the 7th Inning Stretch yesterday, did he throw out a first pitch too? Because doesn't the conductor normally throw the first pitch out as well? Pete says that they usually have several people throw out the first pitch and usually one of them is also singing. |
| 6:55
| G-Reg said on the radio that he was more nervous about the song than the first pitch. He's an athlete though so he can get it over the plate. It must be great to be G-Reg at a Cubs game. He seems to like it here though, he seems to be fitting in in his adopted city. |
| 6:56
| Live read: Townstone Financial |
| 6:57
| Alright time for the web poll. Yesterday's web poll question was "are you in a ticket share?" 13% of the people said yes and 86% said no. |
| 6:58
| Today's web poll question is "who is hotter?" And the options are Katie Lee Joel and Jessica Seinfeld. Steve has photos of both of them so Buzz can make a decision. |
| 6:59
| Billy Joel's wife seems hotter. For some odd reason Billy has a way with the ladies. He's not that good looking either. It must be the piano and the sensitivity. |
| 7:00
| Billy Joel's wife was on Oprah's couch the other day. Today's the day when Oprah is having that guy who's pregnant on her show. Then she'll act shocked and appalled even though she probably has final approval on who her guests are. |
| 7:01
| So Billy Joel's wife is on Oprah's couch talking about how happy she is and Celia Rivenbark of the Post-Star wanted to smack her with her spatula. Where's the Post-Star at? |
| 7:02
| Joel's wife is perky and gorgeous and probably young enough to still have her wisdom teeth but that's not why this writer wanted to stick this woman's head in the oven. Steve doesn't know who this woman is but he likes her. |
| 7:03
| Billy Joel's wife has a new cookbook, coming on the heels of Jessica Seinfeld's cookbook. Why do women who marry insanely rich men think they still have to cook? |
| 7:04
| Then Katie Lee Joel showed Oprah how she makes meatloaf. And the audience squealed like she was making Pheasant de Foie Gras Snootypants" |
| 7:05
| Oprah then said "She's making meatloaf!" three times like she always does when she's excited about something. |
| 7:06
| All this got Celia thinking that if you're married to Billy Joel you should at least be frying him up a steak. Or you should be making reservations for a restaurant. |
| 7:07
| Celia would prefer that this woman just sit on the couch and say her husband's worth $800 million and she has no idea where the stove is. |
| 7:08
| This woman's really funny. She's a freelance columnist in Wilmington, NC. Her email address is here, Steve might email her. |
| 7:09
| News with Buzz |
| 7:10
| Barack Obama has a new friend in Al Gore. The presidential candidate said that if he's elected Gore would have a high-level place in his cabinet. |
| 7:11
| Shortly before telling supporters to "chill out" Bill Clinton flew into a rage because Bill Richardson had endorsed Obama. Hillary said she was surprised she didn't get Richardson's endorsement because he watched the Super Bowl with Bill. |
| 7:12
| What's the big deal with this? The Clintons are a bunch of babies. Something happens and they talk about it for 2 weeks. |
| 7:13
| A new poll shows that 40% of voters would not vote for John McCain because of his stance on Iraq and his connection to President Bush. Still though, 60% is enough to win. |
| 7:14
| Osama bin Laden is said to be in good health according to one of his second-in-command. How does these guys have more access to the media than everyone else does? |
| 7:15
| They're all over the internet and we can't track them down? Is someone is involved in kiddy porn they're tracked down, why can't we find Osama? |
| 7:16
| Ted Turner believes in global warming and he painted a grim future if it keeps happening. He says crops will no longer grow, people will die and the ones who survived will become cannibals. Doesn't sound so bad! Jeffrey Dahmer was 50 years ahead of his time. |
| 7:17
| Scientists testing on rats have discovered that Botox injections go directly to their brain. You don't want a brain with no wrinkles. Botox can behave like botulism so that's something to think about next time you get an injection. Steve will remember that, he's getting a Botox shot today. |
| 7:18
| Mariah Carey has surpassed Elvis Presley for the most #1 hits. Todd Cavanah is the program director at Jack and The B and the assistant PD is apparently friends with Mariah and talks to her on the phone all the time. He should have Mariah call Steve, he'll talk to her. |
| 7:24
| Live read: Hawthorne Race Course |
| 7:25
| Steve was at Hawthorne a few weeks ago and it's fun. It has an old school feel but also has modern amenities. |
| 7:26
| As Buzz knows baseball season has begun. The Sox home opener is on Monday against the Twins. |
| 7:27
| Steve has the Scout Seats which he got because he doesn't drink any more and he's not paying for college any more. So he had some extra money to spend and he got the premium seats. |
| 7:28
| Steve can't even say how many people come up to him and say they saw him on TV at the Sox game. Steve made sure to get seats that weren't going to be on TV. The guy people see on TV is always wearing an M & M's NASCAR jacket. |
| 7:29
| We've got that guy on the phone, it's George Jacobs. People have been telling George he looks like Steve. George isn't sure what Steve looks like but he's 6 foot, jet black hair and very slim. |
| 7:30
| Steve thinks they're both very handsome but he doesn't have an M & M's jacket. It's not that George conducts himself in a poor manner or anything. Although being behind home plate like that you have to be careful what you're eating. |
| 7:31
| The M & M's jacket has sort of become a tradition for George, he wears it to a lot of sporting events he goes to. George feels that the only thing to do now is have Steve sit next to him at opening day. |
| 7:32
| A lot of people tell George he should contact M & M's about an endorsement deal. He owns Windy City Limousine, he should be wearing one of their jackets instead. |
| 7:33
| George would even send a limo for Steve to get to the game. Steve wouldn't mind that although he loves his parking. George loves the parking too, it's the best part. Steve doesn't understand how anyone could be a Cubs fan just based on the parking alone? |
| 7:34
| George seems like a nice enough guy although Steve's not sure if he can handle the pressure of sitting in the front row. He can't pick is nose or do any of the things he likes to do at the game. |
| 7:35
| Should Steve get an M & M's jacket? The other problem is that once Steve sits in the front row it'll be hard to go back to the 6th row. He can rationalize being in the 6th row now because he doesn't want to be on TV. But once he's on TV he might demand more screen time. |
| 7:36
| Steve got mad the other day because they showed Jurko during the Hawks game in Columbus. It's entirely possible that Steve will go haywire and want to be on TV more often. |
| 7:37
| Caller Russ thinks if Steve sits with George one of them should be peanut and one should be plain. George is peanut with the yellow jacket so Steve would have to go with the brown jacket. Or he could go tan and be almond. |
| 7:38
| Steve's very happy with his seats. If he goes outside of that then it'll mess him up. Sitting in the front row would be a gateway drug. Next thing you know he's running on the field like the Ligues. Buzz thinks that would be a great promotion though. Maybe Steve could get a Jack FM tattoo. |
| 7:39
| How many seats does this guy have if Steve can bring a friend with him? It seems like he needs to get into the limo business though. Although sitting in the front row would cut down on how much Steve eats. |
| 7:40
| Steve always weight during the baseball season plus this year he's added the Blackhawks season tickets. It's lucky for the White Sox that Steve doesn't drink any more or their Scout Seat program would be out of business. Steve would probably be dead too or else in his 12th month of rehab. |
| 7:41
| Buzz thinks that when people are faced with an all-you-can-eat or drink situation they'll want to eat or drink as much as possible. Because there will come a day when it's not all-you-can-eat or drink. |
| 7:42
| Most people who sit in the Scout Seats on a regular basis eventually ease up on drinking as much as they can at the games. But if it's your first or only time most people tend to get hammered. |
| 7:48
| Steve needs a Taco Pal for the Eight O'Clock Taco Bell which is coming up soon. And don't forget to email Steve with your Taco Bell stories. |
| 7:49
| Caller Dave heard Steve talking about people overeating at Sox games and he and his friend went to a Sox game and tried the 9-for-9 challenge. That involves eating one hot dog and drinking one beer every inning. |
| 7:50
| Does that usually involve at least one person vomiting on the way to the car? The 9 hot dogs alone would be tough but it's a little easier with the beer. Steve couldn't do that because he doesn't drink. Dave has hung up although he seemed disinterested in his own concept. |
| 7:51
| Up at Dahl.com there are now photos of Billy Joel's wife and Jerry Seinfeld's wife for the web poll. Billy's wife is on the left and she seems hotter. |
| 7:52
| Based on what we've seen over the years it seems like Billy Joel did everything for himself. On Seinfeld it seemed like Larry David did most of the comedic heavy lifting. |
| 7:53
| It seems like the Seinfelds are trying to keep up with the Joels though. Billy of course wrapped his car around a tree once and now Steve has a story about Jerry rolling his vintage car over in an accident. He wasn't injured in the accident. |
| 7:54
| After the breaks went out in his 1967 Fiat he tried the emergency brake which didn't work. Then he swerved to keep the car from going into an intersection. He's a hero no matter what he does, even though he's driving around in a car that's not properly maintained. |
| 7:55
| Jerry took the crash in snide saying he doesn't recommend driving without brakes unless you have professional clown training or a comedy background. |
| 7:56
| Senator Debbie Stabenow or Michigan kept to her schedule yesterday as news broke that her husband had a $150 encounter with a prostitute. |
| 7:57
| Stabenow has vowed to work through what she's calling a family matter. Her husband, Thomas Athans, was stopped by police who were investigating prostitution at a hotel. |
| 7:58
| Athans is the co-founder of the liberal TalkUSA radio network. His attorney said he cooperated fully with law enforcement. What else are you going to do when they see you coming out of the hotel room? |
| 7:59
| Caller Jim has some info about car brakes. Steve realizes that his Jerry Seinfeld impersonation sounds like Buzz today. He'll have to hear Jerry again. |
| 8:00
| It's time for the Eight O'Clock Taco Bell and it's Thursday which means a Lunch Date with Steve. |
| 8:01
| On the phone is Steve's Taco Pal, from Lake Villa, Steve. He'll be going to the Taco Bell on Grand Avenue in Lindenhurst. |
| 8:02
| Taco Pal Steve's strategy at Taco Bell is quantity. So he'll go with 4 regular tacos and then 1 or 2 bean burritos. |
| 8:03
| Taco Pal Steve always finds himself going back to the original Taco Bell menu items time after time. That's probably why they still have them on the menu. |
| 8:04
| Taco Pal Steve got burned out on the colas a while ago so he usually goes with a Mountain Dew or something like that. |
| 8:05
| Buzz can't believe that Taco Pal Steve is never tempted by the Cheesy Beefy Melt. He should take a walk on the wild side, he won't be disappointed. |
| 8:06
| Alright, now back to the story of the guy in Michigan who was just trying to take the edge off while his wife spent the afternoon working. |
| 8:07
| Athans apologized in a statement issued by his attorney and again said he cooperated with authorities. What else is he going to do? Was he going to have a shoot-out at the Residence Inn? Maybe make a run for it and try to lose them in the inadequate workout room? Maybe duck into the maid's closet? What else is he going to do? |
| 8:08
| Stabenow told the AP that she's grateful for the prayers and support of people during this time. Steve just wanted to say he's not praying for them. Why would someone pray for them? Steve doesn't support them either. |
| 8:09
| Athans' involvement brought comparisons to New York Governor Eliot Spitzer who resigned last month after allegations that he spent thousands on a call girl the night before Valentine's day. Steve likes the outrage about when Spitzer got the prostitute, as if it's a big deal to be the night before Valentine's day. Even if it was on Valentine's day, what's the big deal?! |
| 8:10
| Stabenow was scheduled to attend a morning news conference with University of Michigan President Mary Sue Coleman but did not appear. Wasn't she supposed to be keeping to her schedule? |
| 8:11
| Police in Troy, Michigan were staking out a hotel room when they saw Athans enter a room. They stopped his in his car when he left 15 minutes later. They probably didn't want to mess up their sting. |
| 8:12
| Athans told police that he had paid $150 for sex. He had responded to a Craigslist ad. The woman listed her prices as $100 for 15 minutes, $160 for a half hour and $225 for an hour. So maybe he went for a half hour and then left early and got a $10 discount? |
| 8:13
| The police report included an ad for a girl named Kasey who was later revealed to be Alycia Martin. She said that the web posting and room rental had been arranged by another party. |
| 8:14
| Police did not bring any sex charges against Athans but later mailed him a ticket for driving on a suspended license. |
| 8:15
| Athans was cooperative and didn't drop any names or ask for preferential treatment according to department spokesman Lt. Gerry Scherlink. |
| 8:16
| Someone must have ratted the guy out then right? Diane Sawyer was right in her exposè, guys usually do get the easy way out on this prostitution stuff. At least until they're ratted out. |
| 8:24
| They say prostitution is the world's oldest profession. It makes sense. Kudos to the first lady who decided to put a price on that. |
| 8:25
| Especially if it started out with Adam and Eve, she was probably getting a work out. Steve doesn't get that whole Adam and Eve thing either. If they had Cain and Abel then how did they begat anyone? |
| 8:26
| Maybe she started charging because it was getting freaky. Either way there are some gaps in the whole thing for Steve. |
| 8:27
| Live read: Joebees |
| 8:28
| Steve wants Buzz to be aware of cheap bee pollen. It could be from hornets or wasps. Not all pollen is created equal, Joebees is the good stuff. |
| 8:29
| Song: Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol |
| 8:33
| That's your Snow Patrol right there, Chasing Cars. That's what the cops in Michigan were doing at that hotel prostitution sting. |
| 8:34
| Steve tries to play 3 songs everyday but then sometimes people expect three songs. Buzz doesn't think Steve should have any sort of policy for songs because some part of him will try to undermined it. |
| 8:35
| Steve just undermineded his own policy because he'd rather play no songs than just 1 song. He drives himself crazy but it's not a short drive. |
| 8:36
| That song sort of ties in although most people probably don't lay around with prostitutes dreaming about the future. Most people don't run off with a prostitute although it has to happen once in a while. |
| 8:37
| Maybe if you're a prostitute who's paying their way through nursing school, like Steve did, you quit when you finally make it and don't tell anyone. |
| 8:38
| Alright it's Peanut Butter Jelly Time with Pat Boyle. How about that game at the United Center last night? It was awesome. |
| 8:39
| Before we get into all of that can Steve tell Pat what the Peanut Butter Jelly shot is. It's 3/4 of an ounce of Frangelico which is almond flavored which Buzz snorts at. Who's drinking that stuff? It's a chick liqueur. The manliest liqueur and the one that Buzz likes is the Quarenta y Tres. |
| 8:40
| Then you add a quarter of an ounce of Bailey's, a quarter of Stoli Raspberry and a quarter of Chambourd. So the song is annoying, Steve, Buzz and Pat everyday but it's catching on with everyone else. Steve will like it once it catches on. |
| 8:41
| The game was awesome last night, Steve saw Dan McNeil there. He told him to keep an eye on #88. Patrick Kane is good? What about #19, is he good? |
| 8:42
| There are two games to play and the chances of the Blackhawks getting into the playoffs are still pretty slim. Nashville has to lose to St. Louis tonight. Right now the Hawks are 3 games out. |
| 8:43
| If Nashville loses tonight they're still 3 games out until they play again on Friday. That's what's confusing to Steve, it's not like baseball. If the Hawks win on Friday then they're only 1 point away. |
| 8:44
| If the Hawks tie and go to overtime and win on Sunday then they make it in. The Blackhawks have the tie breaker on Nashville so they can deal with a tie tonight. |
| 8:45
| There was some bad blood at that game last night so Sunday should be good. That Chris Chelios is funny though. He's 46 and still playing at an All-Star level. |
| 8:46
| Last night he kept cross-checking Patrick Kane and even when he got sent to the penalty box he was acting like he didn't do anything wrong. |
| 8:47
| So everyone is becoming a St. Louis Blues fan for at least tonight. The Hawks can beat the Red Wings again although those guys seemed pretty mad last night. |
| 8:48
| The Red Wings need 1 more point to get home ice advantage for the playoffs so if they win their next game they'll probably rest all of their starters on Sunday. You hate to get into the playoffs that way but Steve will take it. |
| 8:49
| Chef Hans brought Carmen or Silvie by Steve's seats yesterday. Hans gave him a cursory handshake as if to tell Steve that he'd found a new radio guy to latch onto. Then he dropped a Scotty Bowman on him. He was gone in 30 seconds. |
| 8:50
| If Chef had seen Dan McNeil last night it would probably be all over. Dan was giving Steve some Blackhawks pointers. Why do all sports guys assume they know more than everyone else? |
| 8:55
| Steve appreciates Pete putting up a hockey drop-in but not from Men in Tree. Steve doesn't approve of Pete watching that show, it's for girls. There's a lot of hockey talk on the show but that's probably because girls like hockey players. |
| 8:56
| Steve can see why though. They seem to get all of their aggressions out on the ice so off the ice they seem much more reasonable. They've already proven themselves. |
| 8:57
| Alright so we've got a little audio from the Blackhawks. They came out flying last night which they have to do for the next 2 games. |
| 8:58
| Vito from The Sopranos, the one who was gay, shot the puck. He scored at the one end with the three slits and then at the other end with the one slit. Of course his money goes to charity although he could probably use it. |
| 8:59
| It's not like that guy is getting a ton of work. Plus as the gay mobster he's probably going to be typecast from now on. He's probably trying hard to put that all behind him. |
| 9:00
| Steve and Vito were reading the same book, Devil in the White City, so he'd appreciate it if he put it behind him too. Plus Steve has the same car as Carmella Soprano. |
| 9:01
| Remember when Vito and Johnny Cakes had that picnic together? The worst scene though was when Finn came to the construction site early and Vito was in the car with the security guard. |
| 9:02
| Both baseball teams are off to a glorious start at 0-2. They're still getting a lot of love in the papers though. Meanwhile the biggest game of the Hawks season barely gets mentioned. |
| 9:03
| Steve was so mad listening to the game on the way to the game last night. He really enjoyed listening to Farmio and the Stone Pony though, they're really great at analyzing what's going on. |
| 9:04
| Steve did find it irritating that the Hawks game on the radio was moved to WIND. WIND had a little post-game but then it said tune over to The Score for more post-game. |
| 9:05
| So Steve tunes to The Score and they do another 20 pointless minutes of Sox post-game with drunken, disgruntled Sox fans. They have 160 more games to analyze. |
| 9:06
| The Sox lost 7-2 to the Indians, keep up the good work! The Sox game starts this morning at 11 AM. The Cubs will try to get a win with Ryan Dempster pitching. That'll be interesting to see. |
| 9:07
| Alfonso Soriano is moving back to the leadoff spot, he's 0-9 batting second. So we'll see how that works. |
| 9:08
| Finally there was an internet report saying you could rent Dennis Rodman. It was an April Fool's joke that some websites, and WGN, bit on. |
| 9:09
| Did Pat hear about the Senator's husband who got busted in a prostitution sting? That was up in Troy, Michigan, Pat's home town. |
| 9:10
| Buzz has a Troy College jersey, he should wear it in sometime. Pat isn't aware of any Troy College. Buzz in a half-jersey wouldn't be a bad look though. |
| 9:18
| Caller Ellie has some info for Buzz about Troy University. She loves Steve and Buzz and they love her. Ellie knows that because she's called in before. Steve had a lot of ladies coming up to him at the game last night. Steve told Matt Dahl that's how he rolls and Matt rolled his eyes at him. That's how Matt rolls. |
| 9:19
| Ellie has been listening since she was 17. Steve spanked her once but he can't do that any more because she's a born again Christian. Spare the rod, spoil the listener, that's right in the Bible! That's Old Testament, the Christians are New Testament. |
| 9:20
| So Ellie probably didn't approve of Steve and Buzz saying they didn't understand the whole Adam and Eve story. The radio actually wasn't on because Ellie was in the car with her husband. He doesn't approve of Steve and Buzz? |
| 9:21
| Ellie's husband isn't from Chicago so he doesn't know about the show. Although the last time she called in he asked her if this was a Christian radio show. Ellie and her husband sound like a barrel of laughs. |
| 9:22
| Ellie was down at the University of Alabama Birmingham last week where her nephew plays baseball. They were playing Troy University which is also in Alabama. That makes sense to Buzz since the jersey is red. He's still not sure how he got it though. |
| 9:23
| Steve's going to try to not spin the wheel all the time, plus Ellie said she was on before. Also he doesn't like being told he can't spank someone any more. Spare the rod, spoil the listener, Steve's always said that. |
| 9:24
| Steve also doesn't like a mixed marriage where one person likes him and the other person doesn't give a rat's ass about him. |
| 9:25
| Steve would has two things he'd like to say. First of all in those ads we run for Dr. Chupchin, it's consultation not counseltation. Steve hears it every time he goes to use the bathroom. He's tried to get it changed but there seem to be thousands of those ads. |
| 9:26
| Also, Steve is really irritated that CBS has switched to a new provider who's unable to put out a quality stream, or in some cases not even a stream, for 2 days straight. He's sent out emails about it but all he gets back is that it's a system-wide problem. That's unacceptable. |
| 9:27
| The head of CBS radio is in the building although Steve doesn't want to go over anyone's head. He's not going to barge into a meeting between Rod Zimmerman and Dan Mason demanding to know what's going on. He should go to Todd who will then talk to Rod who will talk to Dan. |
| 9:28
| The emails Steve gets back from those guys are just ways to calm him down and assure him he's not being singled out. Because that was his first thought. |
| 9:29
| Steve got a lot of emails about it yesterday and that's just the people who took the time to email. And of course Steve can't tell all of those listeners that they're working on it because they can't hear the show. |
| 9:30
| How does a company get a contract to do this job, streaming the show, and then have it not working for 2 days? |
| 9:31
| News with Buzz |
| 9:32
| All ATA flights have been grounded as the airline has filed for bankruptcy. Would Buzz be interested in picking up one of their planes on the cheap with Steve? What if you have an ATA ticket? It's probably worthless right? |
| 9:33
| Barack Obama says that if elected he will have place in his cabinet for Al Gore. The wrong track is cued up on the CD player, that's Bill Richardson. Steve's going to try it again. |
| 9:34
| It's Bill Richardson again. Obama is track 1 right? Buzz keeps waiting for Jim to run up here and confess something. |
| 9:35
| Steve calls down to the newsroom. Jim's not sure what the problem is, he burned the CD with Obama first then Richardson. That's Jim's story and he's sticking to it? He can burn a new CD if Steve wants him to. That's probably not necessary, there are only 3 tracks on this CD, Obama has to be somewhere. |
| 9:36
| OK there it is, Barack Obama. Meanwhile Jane Fonda has come out in support of Barack Obama. |
| 9:37
| Caller Dwayne is Steve's Mason buddy. Steve and Buzz keep threatening to join the Masons. Dwayne's lodge baked a bunch of turkeys for people on Thanksgiving, it's a neighborhood outreach. You can't give people frozen turkeys. They'll go bad plus they could be blunt instruments. |
| 9:38
| Dwayne saw on the news this morning that if people had ATA tickets they'd have to go through their credit card company for a refund. |
| 9:39
| Well at least there is some way to get your money back. Although ticket holders are probably lower down on the list than Boeing or whoever they lease the planes from. |
| 9:40
| Also endorsing Barack Obama is Lovie Smith. Lovie knows Barack is a Bears fan. Well...Barack, he's our candidate. |
| 9:41
| Former Presidential candidate Bill Richardson is also endorsing Barack Obama. It seems like The Clintons will do anything to win. It's not really the feel-good that most people initially got from The Clintons. |
| 9:42
| It doesn't seem like Barack would do anything to win. The Republicans will do anything to win too. |
| 9:43
| Over a dozen Cuban immigrants reached American soil last night in Miami and because of the wet-foot-dry-foot policy were immediately processed and let in the country. |
| 9:44
| If Steve were a Haitian he would do whatever it took to become a U.S. citizen and then sue the government because that wet-foot-dry-foot policy seems unconstitutional. Of course those people aren't citizens so maybe it doesn't count. It's a ridiculous policy though. It's like the Cubans just run all of Florida. |
| 9:45
| Buzz doesn't mind so much because he enjoys watching the footage of people trying to come ashore and try to make land while being blocked by INS agents. But the policy should be extended to everyone. |
| 9:46
| The Ernie Banks statue has now been fixed and the base reads "Let's Play Two". The sculptor called in yesterday. Steve heard a lot of promos from other shows of talking to that guy but this was the only one he wanted to call himself. |
| 9:47
| Dr. Stanley Goldfarb says if you're thirsty, drink and if you're not thirsty don't drink. A group of researchers has found no evidence that water really helps you. It doesn't seem to flush your body of toxins or make you less hungry. |
| 9:48
| The average adult should only consume about a quart and a half of water per day, about what they lose from their body. |
| 9:49
| Meanwhile scientists have successfully bred human/cow embryos but they only live for a few days. That's a cow that could cook it's own steak. |
| 9:50
| By the way Buzz, if you were planning on heading to Greektown today, Greek Islands is closed. That's usually Buzz's favorite place in Greektown. |
| 9:51
| Not to worry though Buzz, all they found was mice feces and fruit flies in the food storage area. That was probably just oregano that Buzz had on his food. And anything bad gets burned off by the flaming cheese. |
| 9:58
| Live read: Hawthorne Race Course |
| 9:59
| As Steve said, Hawthorne is old school but it has a lot of amenities. |
