 |
 |
|
| 5:32
| Let's hope that Steve and Buzz's voices carry this morning. Otherwise they're just a couple of idiots talking in an office building when they should be sound asleep. |
| 5:33
| Steve has decided that his voice is not raspy from yelling at the dogs. He didn't yell at the dogs last night and it's still raspy. He was at the Sox game but didn't yell at anyone, not even a hot dog vendor. |
| 5:34
| There are a lot of things going around, including allergies. Or maybe Steve's going through puberty, that would be nice. Buzz has heard the hormones are rough. Steve's thinking about sex every 5 seconds which is up from the normal 7. |
| 5:35
| Steve had to record some more commercials after the show yesterday and then he went for his second golf lesson. Ed Farmer was there, he's pretty good. Steve did alright though but he's got blisters on his hands. That happens very easily because he's never done an honest day's work in his life. Steve's hands are softer than any supermodel. |
| 5:36
| Then Steve came home and took a nap that went on too long. He had to wake up and write his blog and then meet David Hochberg at the Sox game. David is a buffet enabler, he came back to his seat with 2 plates of food. It was Asian night at the buffet. |
| 5:37
| Steve ate too much at the buffet but he and David did not eat at their seats. Well David had a pretzel but Steve only had 3 Pepsis. Then he couldn't get to sleep last night. He's on a prescription sleeping pill but it's sort of useless. |
| 5:38
| Steve didn't get to sleep until midnight and he woke up at 4 am feeling bloated from the food and not working out yesterday. So what did he do? He went to Dunkin' Donuts this morning. |
| 5:39
| Steve's not really sure what's happening with the girl at Dunkin' Donuts. She's attractive in a Kama Sutra kind of way. Steve doesn't know what to call that part of the world. Is it just India? It's not the Middle East is it? |
| 5:40
| The girl usually has chipped fingernail polish but it looks like she's trying to take care of herself a little bit. She did get mad at Steve because he only had a twenty. He thought that she punished him by charging him an extra 11¢ but maybe that's just the tax on $1.39. |
| 5:41
| It just seemed like it was a punishment because she was mad at him. He can't really understand what she's saying though, he just wants her to go make donuts. It wouldn't be bad having a girlfriend who makes donuts. |
| 5:42
| Steve still has the donut maker next door as well as a bunch of Crisco. Steve thought a Crisco party was going to break out in the office yesterday. Today might not be the best day to try that thing out, Steve could go into a carbohydrate coma. |
| 5:43
| But he's got the machine and the Crisco and the batter from the McCracken Financial girls. It doesn't make professional-sized donuts, they're personal size. |
| 5:44
| David Hochberg doesn't like any other loan people who advertise here. When he heard Steve talking about the donut maker David told Adam that he'd get him the same model that the McCracken women sent over. Steve told David he didn't want one though. |
| 5:45
| Steve didn't take David to the Sox game just to keep him happy, although he wants him to be happy. David also understands that we can't reject ads from other companies. |
| 5:46
| Steve actually had a good time with David because he does all the talking. Plus you have to appreciate a guy who comes back from the buffet with two plates of food. It was a good game too because the Sox won 16-5. Even Steve and David hit home runs. They might not have enough fireworks left for the Fourth of July. |
| 5:47
| Then the Cubs lost to Tampa Bay. You hate to see them lose to Tampa but then again you don't. The Sox lose to them all the time so why shouldn't the Cubs? Tampa's a good team though and the Cubs put up a fight until the very end. |
| 5:48
| They lost it on an attempted suicide squeeze by Reed Johnson, he tried to take out the first basement. Steve thought it was pretty impressive even though they lost. Pete disagrees. He didn't think it was a suicide squeeze either |
| 5:49
| Lou mentioned after the game that he didn't call for a suicide squeeze which is why Pete was upset. Reed Johnson took it upon himself to try the bunt or it was an accident. The guy on third base needs to know that a squeeze is on. |
| 5:50
| Steve's not talking to Pete about the Cubs, he's too pokey with his answers and he sounds groggy and disheartened. Not that Jim is going to be much better. |
| 5:51
| Steve won't like Jim's answer, he didn't even see it because he was at a concert. He agrees with Steve that it was a suicide squeeze but you need to tell the third basemen. Pete doesn't agree with that, does he just want to be argumentative? |
| 5:52
| Steve knows what it's like to lose to Tampa Bay, it's depressing. That ballpark is oppressive, Jim doesn't understand how Tampa is so good there. Pete was just hoping one of Bob Brenly's kids was going to get engaged during the game. Jim has noticed that Brenly has been very proud of his son who just got drafted by the Cubs and is starting off in their system. It's not the same as Hawk's son getting engaged. Actually it's more appropriate. |
| 5:53
| Steve sees what Pete is saying about calling the squeeze play. Jim was just happy that the Cubs got an earned run against that Tampa pitcher, it was his first at home since April. Jim hates Neal Cotts though. |
| 5:54
| According to the Sarasota Herald Tribune-which Steve gets delivered to his door-Evan Longoria threw out Reed Johnson on a game-ending suicide squeeze attempt. Steve thought it was a squeeze because that's what it said on the news. It didn't look that way to Pete but that's only based on a feeling. Steve's sorry he started this conversation with two hapless Cubs fans who think they know more about baseball because they pee in a trough. |
| 5:55
| Is Jim still on the line, Steve wanted to know what concert he was at last night. It was The Swell Season which is the people from that movie Once. Buzz of course hasn't seen that because no one gets killed in it. Steve saw that on the Chicago Theater marquee last night when he was watching the ABC news, it was sponsored by XRT. JIm enjoyed Lin Brehmer's pre-show explanation of why everyone feels ownership of that music. |
| 6:02
| Steve didn't hear the drop, it was Ed Farmer during last night's Sox game. Did he say Steve was a good golfer? Is Pete not talking to Steve any more? |
| 6:03
| Ed just said that he saw Steve, he didn't comment on his sporting acumen. Did he actually say acumen? Buzz didn't hear it either. Because there are only two breaks per hour Steve and Buzz end up doing a lot during the breaks. None of it's show related either. |
| 6:04
| Usually it's getting some food or sauntering down the hall for a beverage. Buzz is working his ass off down in the newsroom, demanding to know where his trail mix bar is. Those things just don't get up and walk away on their own! |
| 6:05
| After Steve's golf lesson Ed gave him a tour of Cog Hill where they're having the BMW Open which used to be the Western Open. Steve usually just goes along with Ed. |
| 6:06
| Steve's having a good time although he doesn't like missing the ball. He has noticed that a lot of people aren't good and also miss the ball so that gives him hope. Steve also looks good in his golf shirts. |
| 6:07
| Steve's instructor lent him some clubs to practice on so he's very close to buying his own set. The instructor did compliment Steve and Ed said that never happens. Pete's wondering how far Steve is from an actual round of golf. |
| 6:08
| Steve's probably about 4 or 5 years from playing a round. He got a blister on his hand about 50 minutes into the lesson. He didn't want to stop but the instructor stopped him and said that was probably about the limit of Steve's attention span. |
| 6:09
| Turns out this golf thing is huge although Steve's getting a lot of emails from people reminding him that he hated golf. What else is Steve supposed to do? Drink? |
| 6:10
| Caller Mike grew up with Pete and he was reminded that he has caddying experience. Steve could grab Buzz and Pete and Catman could caddy for them. Steve would make Pete wear "Dahl" on his back. |
| 6:11
| Pete would like to go out golfing with Steve sometime, maybe on that lakefront course. Steve's not ready for that yet but Pete's not very good either. As Mike recalls Pete wasn't a very good caddy. What kind of childhood friend is this? |
| 6:12
| Pete actually doesn't remember Mike. He married Pete's backyard neighbor. Now he remembers him, they just had a baby. So he's from the HH? The Hills? The lakefront course is closed but Steve's not ready for it anyway. |
| 6:13
| Steve thinks he's homing in on it but he doesn't want to go out and play a round and mess that up. Yesterday he was doing pretty well hitting the ball until the instructor called Ed and some other guy over to watch. |
| 6:14
| The hardest part for Pete is when he starts a round and everyone is watching you. Sometimes he goes out with Catman and they get paired up with 2 other people. It does seem like Chach City out on a golf course, things could go bad chachwise. |
| 6:15
| Mike has won tickets to see Steve Miller (woo-woo) and Joe Cocker. Buzz is surprised that Steve Miller gets billing over Joe Cocker. It's sort of a coin flip for Buzz. Steve thinks that Steve Miller has more commercial drawing power. |
| 6:16
| Caller John has a cure for first tee jitters. All you have to do is watch the 3 foursomes before you. Chances are of those 12 guys only 3 or 4 will actually hit the ball well. |
| 6:17
| Steve is finding that out through his instructions. Yesterday while Ed was showing Steve the new Cog Hill holes (Steve doesn't know where the old ones were) they came across a guy ready to take a shot. |
| 6:18
| The guy told Ed and Steve to pass by but Ed told him they were going to stay and watch and put some pressure on him. Then the guy hit the ball about 6 inches twice in a row. Steve felt bad for him. |
| 6:19
| Steve appreciates the tip, he has been noticing that most people aren't good. John says you need to drive for show and put for dough. People keep asking Steve about his short game and he says he can mini golf with the best of them. Putting has to be easier without the windmill. |
| 6:20
| This golf is very popular as it turns out and so far Steve is liking it. It's only week two so Steve is resisting the urge to go all in. Sometimes he ends up being like a Goofy cartoon where he gets all the stuff and then loses interest after a week. Right now he's just borrowing clubs but sometimes Steve accessorizes prior to being good at something. He got all the mountain climbing gear but he has no idea how to climb a mountain. It looks awesome when he puts it on though. |
| 6:26
| Steve was going to play some Steve Miller since we just talked about him. Steve Miller Band was one of Steve's favorite bands but they got lame after The Joker. |
| 6:27
| Song: Saving Grace, Steve Miller Band |
| 6:31
| Steve has an iPhone which he's been trying to use for all his music listening needs. There are headphones you can get that also double as a phone headset. |
| 6:32
| Steve can't get the iPhone to shuffle correctly though, it just keeps going through the same 10 songs and Steve's getting sick of them. So if anyone knows how to get that going, call in. |
| 6:33
| Buzz only just discovered the shuffle feature on his iPod. He was getting so sick of hearing the same songs and then he hit shuffle. Everything is new again! |
| 6:34
| Steve has his iTunes on Smart Shuffle, should he set that to Less Likely to hear the same songs from the same artist? Probably. Steve though Random would be good enough. |
| 6:35
| Caller Willy started taking golf lessons about 13 years ago. His instructor told him that learning on Calloway is the best. However Willy couldn't afford them. Being a salesmen he decided to call the Calloway headquarters. |
| 6:36
| For a week Willy was talking to Eli Calloway's assistant, telling her his plight. Finally she put him through to Eli who asked him to send him a letter with his story. Then he got a free set of clubs, so that's an option for Steve. |
| 6:37
| Steve has a little more self-respect than that but he appreciates the story. If you can't afford golf clubs then maybe you should get a second job instead of taking up golf. It seems like a lot of guys are running scams like this though. |
| 6:38
| Would Buzz do that? Would he call Honer for a week trying to get free harmonicas? They probably gave Willy the clubs just to get him to stop calling. |
| 6:39
| Steve doesn't like being comped on anything, he feels embarrassed by it. There was time when Buzz had a deal worked out with Tony Buffalo at Guitar Center. Buzz got free harmonicas in exchange for mentioning Guitar Center at the beginning and end of every show. He put it on the program log though so it wasn't plugola. |
| 6:40
| Then Tony Buffalo left and the new guy at Guitar Center put all of these restrictions on how many harmonicas he could get and when he could get them. At that point Buzz realized that he could afford to pay for harmonicas and that was preferable to dealing with this guy. |
| 6:41
| There was a part of Buzz that felt he should get free harmonicas because he was on the radio. If Willy's ego can take getting the free clubs then that's fine. Steve's at the point in his life where he prefers to pay for stuff. People always say they'll give him something for a mention on the show but he can't really do it. |
| 6:42
| It seems like caller Willy is misapplying himself if he spends a week calling Calloway to get free clubs. Maybe he should try harder at his job. How much can a set of clubs cost, even really good ones? Willy seemed very proud of what he'd done though. |
| 6:43
| Well kudos to Willy. The part that made Steve feel dirty is that Willy thought it was something he should do. The guy didn't even have a hard luck story for Calloway, he just wanted free clubs because he didn't want to pay for them. |
| 6:44
| As Buzz learned with the harmonicas, when you start asking for stuff you have no recourse. Steve like having recourse, that's why we all work hard. |
| 6:45
| Steve had something funny happen to him on the way home from his golf lesson. Two lanes were ending so Steve had to get over. He had two options, either back off or speed up and quickly cut over, which he did. |
| 6:46
| That only enraged the guy who Steve cut in front of who then caught up to him, pulled next to him and started ranting. It was a complicated rant about how Steve teaches his children to drive. He hadn't put the guy in danger, he just cut in front of him. |
| 6:47
| He was in the middle of this complicated rant when Steve just said "Hey, sorry about that". The guy didn't even know what to do, he just shut it down and drove off. It was very effective. |
| 6:48
| A thoughtful rant is sort of an oxymoron, you just have to start MF'ing. It was almost a lecture and the guy seemed older than him. Even if Steve had been MF'ed he would have probably apologized. |
| 6:56
| Alright time for the web poll which is on Dahl.com. There's a new one everyday because we're keeping it real. Yesterday's question was "Which do you prefer?" and the options are oysters and head cheese. Oysters were the overwhelming winner. Steve would choose oysters over simmered pork head that's kept together with gelatin. |
| 6:57
| Steve doesn't really like oysters though, it's like eating someone's snot. He does like oysters when they're Rockefellered with cheese and spinach. That way it's more like a clam because it's cooked. |
| 6:58
| Today's web poll question is "Should vehicles be allowed to park in the bus lane?" And we now go to the article from one of Brendan's girlfriends, Kira Kyles. She covered the R. Kelly trial with him for the Tribune. |
| 6:59
| Steve has noticed this week that Brendan sort of seems like a bride just after her wedding. It seems like sort of a letdown coming back after being in court everyday in his suit. |
| 7:01
| Steve would have liked to have his golf lesson taped yesterday because his swing is much improved from last week. Maybe we'll just leave last week's video up until Steve is done with his lessons. |
| 7:02
| Steve would take the train into work but the earliest one doesn't get in until 5:32 which is too late. He has noticed that a Pace bus comes through his neighborhood every afternoon and it seems like there's only one passenger. That's not very efficient. |
| 7:03
| The Red Eye's Going Public is no fan of drivers who park in bus stop areas or block bus paths. That's why Kyles has no problem with bus route supervisors and managers who are now working with the city to ticket drivers for their offenses. |
| 7:04
| Calumet City's Warren Rucker thinks some CTA workers are abusing their parking-ticket issuing power. He was parked near the 95th street L station to pick up his pregnant wife when a bus driver began honking at him. |
| 7:05
| Rucker didn't move up because he though the bus had enough room and he was nowhere near a no-parking zone. As Rucker was making space in the car for his wife by moving his briefcase to the back where his son was sleeping and a CTA supervisor and the bus driver are in front of his car laughing. |
| 7:06
| The supervisor then threatened him with a ticket so Rucker moved to the other side, entered the station and plead his case to a supervisor. He didn't even get a ticket, why is he pleading his case? |
| 7:07
| The CTA must be looking to make up all that money they're losing from letting all the old people ride for free. |
| 7:08
| It doesn't seem like CTA employees should have ticket-writing powers, Steve can see people abusing it. |
| 7:09
| Jim kid wants to know if the guy waited until after his wife arrived to go in and plead his case or if he just left his kid in the car and went in. It doesn't say that but it seems like waited for the wife. Warren Rucker will not be laughed at! |
| 7:10
| Steve would take public transportation if it was convenient. It seems like every morning he has an issue with a driver. Plus if he was on the train he wouldn't stop to get an apple fritter at Dunkin' Donuts. |
| 7:11
| The train would probably be a nice ride that early in the morning and you'd get to see into everyone's backyard. But they need to have an earlier train for Steve to take it. |
| 7:12
| He's probably ride his bike to the train station and then ride the bike to work. That way if he stopped at a Dunkin' Donuts downtown he wouldn't feel bad about the apple fritter. |
| 7:13
| Caller Kevin has a theory about why the CTA supervisor and the bus driver were laughing at him. From the picture Steve was painting the guy seems like a stay-at-home dad who sends his pregnant wife to work. Maybe the guy was feeling self-conscious about all that. |
| 7:14
| Drew Peterson says there's no shame in being a stay-at-home dad. He's hoping Stacy comes back soon though because Jimmy Buffett is coming to town. |
| 7:15
| How great would some make-up sex be on a blanket at the concert? Maybe Kevin will see Drew over by Toyota Park for the Buffett show. |
| 7:23
| Alright before the news and some sports we've got a Drew Peterson article in the paper that Buzz pointed out. Does Steve read it as Drew? It's written by a broad named Michael. |
| 7:24
| Caller Ron thinks that the guy from that CTA article was just doing his job entertaining |
| 7:25
| Alright on to the Michael Sneed article. Psst! Who starts an article like that? Sneed heard that the predatory sex offender brother of Stacy Peterson, who was released from prison earlier this month, visited his missing sister's children |
| 7:26
| To wit: Drew, a former cop, permitted brother-in-law Yelton Cales to visit his nephew and niece. Yelton? Stacy's family is all white trash, she married up when she married Drew. |
| 7:27
| Yelton reportedly phones Peterson during his time behind bars and was released after a four-year sentence for aggravated criminal sexual abuse of a 15-year-old girl. |
| 7:28
| He's now required to register with the state with the rest of his life. Duh, he's a sex offender. Sneed is acting like she just found that out. |
| 7:29
| On the day Stacy disappeared she was planning to repaint Cales' home. That was never reported until now, probably because the guy was in prison. |
| 7:30
| The the article ends with the standard stuff about how Drew is a suspect in Stacy's disappearance. Why can't it just be about Drew letting this guy visit his niece and nephew? Or how about a mention of the reward money or how Drew is Mr. Momming it and taking the kids to water parks. |
| 7:31
| Alright it's time for a report from Peanut Butter, Pat Boyle. |
| 7:35
| The Celtics won the NBA Finals last night, Kevin Garnett was a little weird at the end. He was having mood swings, going from crying to crazy, back to crying then telling Michelle Tafoya she was looking hot. |
| 7:36
| Peanut Butter got a shoutout during the Cubs game last night from Len Kasper. He need to get Len on the show sometime. |
| 7:37
| Live read: The Little Guys |
| 7:38
| Caller Zach has a correction from Peanut Butter's report. He said the Celtics had the largest victory in the NBA Finals with 39 points but our Bulls has 42 in 1998 against the Jazz. |
| 7:39
| Steve doesn't really care although it's good Zach does. Steve doesn't care about basketball, he can't get into a game that always comes down to the last few minutes. |
| 7:40
| The last few minutes are the most exciting part of the game but for some reason that's when the cheerleaders come out and they crank up the Gary Glitter. It's backloaded all wrong for Steve and it's too much. |
| 7:41
| Steve did tune in for the end of the game just to see what would happen. Zach tuned in for the last 5 minutes which ended up taking about 30 minutes. |
| 7:42
| The end of the game was fun though. Who knows, maybe Steve will get into basketball. He didn't think he'd get into hockey like he did last year. Basketball is just too frenetic but Buzz thinks Steve can make an adjustment. He's playing golf now! |
| 7:43
| For some reason basketball just doesn't appeal to Steve but he'll watch if the Bulls are in the playoffs. Buzz went to one basketball game because he had to see Jordan play. You'd think Steve would like basketball more because he looks great in shorts. He doesn't look great in a tank top and that's the dealbreaker. |
| 7:44
| When Buzz was a kid basketball players wore short shorts which is what most likely prevented him from playing. Steve was the same way. |
| 7:50
| Was that a drop of Kevin Garnett talking to Michelle Tafoya? Steve was just getting strapped in when it was playing. He tries to be in the studio when the break ends but with only two breaks per hour he has to get a lot done. |
| 7:51
| On WCKG, which we ran into the ground, there were three breaks per hour. Pete seems very soft-spoken today, has Buzz noticed that? Buzz hears a lot of emotion from Pete, like he's on emotional thin ice. |
| 7:52
| It's Wednesday and Pete did perk up when he saw Bob and Ron come in. Is there any other deep, emotional problem that Pete is hiding? Does he still have the girlfriend living with the hetero guy who always belittles Pete? |
| 7:53
| Pete is a little nervous because he's going to a wedding with his girlfriend this weekend. It's not his wedding right? The girlfriend hangs out with a lot of theater people who are very showy. Pete's more of a hang-by-the-bar guy but the girlfriend has friends who she describes as "a song-and-dance man" |
| 7:54
| Pete's mic placement is a little different today because Bob and Ron are here. He's standing up right now, probably to watch them and make sure they don't steal anything. They have to support the drug habit some how. |
| 7:55
| Usually Bob stays on the other side but Ron is always coming over and looking at Pete's videos. Why do they have to wait in Pete's studio? They don't need to do a 2 hour sound check, can't they want in the kitchen? |
| 7:56
| If they wait in the kitchen then they distract Jim because they chat up every single person who comes in and Buzz. Can't they just wait in the Jack FM lobby with that receptionist who won't let us join the softball team? |
| 7:57
| Where were we? Oh yeah, Pete's hiding some emotional problem. Where's the wedding at? Pete is going to need to be quicker with the answers today, we don't need an exact address, just a city. The wedding is in New York. Would Pete like Buzz to show him how to be a song-and-dance man? He's sort of like our own Christopher Walken. |
| 7:58
| The girlfriend's roommate will be at the wedding to belittle Pete and recommend hair plugs. He was actually recommending Propecia and fish oil pills. |
| 7:59
| Pete might need to bring in Catman although that in itself is dangerous. You never know what he's going to do. Well best of luck Zippy. He just sounds different today but maybe it's allergies or something. |
| 8:00
| Alright it's time for the Eight O'Clock Taco Bell. Steve doesn't mean to yell at Pete but he seems pokey with his answers. |
| 8:01
| Steve's going to give away 365 Border Bucks which according to Steve's calculations is a taco a day for a year. Actually with the Why Pay More Menu it's more than a taco a day. |
| 8:02
| This emailer has never eaten so much Taco Bell in their life as they have since Steve started doing the Eight O'Clock Taco Bell. It's almost like Steve wrote this himself. |
| 8:03
| The emailer has struck up a friendship with the manager of the Taco Bell near Golf Mill. The manager was featured on a Manager Monday on the show. |
| 8:04
| News with Buzz |
| 8:05
| Gulfport, Illinois is now completely submerged after a nearby levee gave way. Now it's just called Gulf, Illinois. Governor Blagojevich has ordered 400 more Illinois Guardsmen to help with sandbags. 400? That's not going to be enough. |
| 8:06
| President Bush is expected to ask lawmakers to lift a ban on offshore drilling around the continental shelf. Democrats are against it for environmental concerns and Barack Obama says the new drilling will not lower gas prices right now. How do we know that? |
| 8:07
| Same-sex marriages have been legal since Monday and so far over 3,000 marriages licenses have been issued statewide. The thing that should be most troubling for some in California is that no one is planning big wedding banquets and registering for gifts. |
| 8:08
| Medical exams of former terrorism suspects at Guantanamo and Abu Gharaib reveal torture and other abuse that resulted in injuries and mental disorders. Doctors examined 11 former prisoners. A whole 11! One man reported being subjected to electric shocks three times and day and being sodomized with a stick. His thumbs bore round scars consistent with shocking. And he walked funny? |
| 8:09
| Barack Obama and Congressional leaders from both parties called for investigations yesterday amid reports that the VA failed to inform veterans that taking the anti-smoking drug Chantix could lead to psychosis and suicide. What does that have to do with veterans? |
| 8:10
| Paris Hilton is said to have lost her temper over the weekend. Steve lost his temper over the weekend, is that in the news? |
| 8:11
| Paris was on the way to a photo shoot when she decided that a Yorkie puppy would make it cuter. When she told that to a pet store employee they refused to sell the puppy to her saying it was an impulse buy. |
| 8:12
| Chicago has the third worst rush hour traffic in the nation and 3 of the 15 worst bottlenecks. |
| 8:13
| Going back to that smoking drug, the soldiers were actually recruited to test it. That would make them more culpable than other institutions. |
| 8:14
| As the full moon rises tonight many people will be tricked into thinking it's unusually large. That's because it looks larger when it's closer to the horizon. |
| 8:15
| Buzz was asked about that last week and he had no answer. He said it's inflated to twice it's size right? Steve always thought the moon was just really close. Why was Buzz asked about the moon? |
| 8:16
| Aimee and Piper are both moon people, they're always talking about it and pointing it out to each other. Did they know we had a waxing gibbous last night? They can call Steve if they want to talk moons. |
| 8:17
| Buzz still doesn't believe that it just seems bigger. It is bigger, it has to be! It's coming to close to the earth! |
| 8:18
| Live read: Townstone Financial |
| 8:19
| Last night at the Sox game David showed Steve an email from a customer on his phone. They write their emails like the live reads. |
| 8:26
| A popular belief, going back at least to the time of Aristotle holds that the moon appears larger near the horizon due to a real magnification effect caused by the Earth's atmosphere. This is not true. |
| 8:27
| The atmosphere does change the color of the moon but does not enlarge it. Actually the moon appears about 1.5% smaller when it is near the horizon than when it's high in the sky. |
| 8:28
| A simple way to demonstrate the illusion is to hold a small object at arm's length with one eye closed. Bob recommended using your pinky. Bob? Of Bob and Ron. Did Buzz get all that when he wandered into the studio? |
| 8:29
| Position the object next to the moon on the horizon and when you do the same thing when the moon is high in the sky the moon is the same sky. |
| 8:30
| Can Bob explain this because Steve doesn't get it. If you hold your pinky up the moon is about the same size as the nail. If you did the same thing when it's higher in the sky it's also the same size. So it's the same size no matter where it is. Can Mark just call in? |
| 8:31
| Mark Czerniec is on the phone, he feels that Bob's suggestion of your pinky nail is very handy. OK, so Bob had a good idea. |
| 8:32
| OK so it turns out Bob doesn't know any more or less than our expert. Steve was predisposed to be irritated with Bob and not just because of his many appearances on the show. |
| 8:33
| Bob floated an idea out to Mary who said it was creepy to talk to him on the phone. You'd think it would be a suggestion about how to improve the segment but instead he wants Steve to put up a link on his website so people can donate to the less successful canine rescue. |
| 8:34
| It figures that Bob is associated with the loser canine rescue that doesn't get any of the money. Ron represents PAWS, they're the winners. He doesn't really but he should say that. He needs to pull himself out of this partnership with Bob. Bob is Ron's Garry Meier. |
| 8:35
| First of all, Bob's suggestion will never happen. Mike Dahl's boss is on the board of directors at PAWS. There name is much easier to remember which is why they get more money. All dogs have paws. |
| 8:36
| Bob isn't involved with Chicago Canine Rescue he just heard that they've been rescuing a lot of dogs with bad injuries. Bob doesn't think PAWS would take those cases. |
| 8:37
| Matt got his dog from PAWS so that isn't saying much. Steve does like Matt's dog but Bob or Ron need to start walking it. That option needs to be there so Matt can ask if he can bring the dog out instead of just bringing it. |
| 8:38
| Matt might feel uncomfortable about having Bob or Ron in his apartment but he also doesn't feel comfortable with Steve being there. So something must be going on. |
| 8:39
| Will Bob be going to Chicago Canine Rescue's Mutt Strut? We just gave them a plug but Steve's not putting a link on his website. Bob just thought Steve might want to, he heard that he beat his dog to death with a shovel . |
| 8:40
| That's very unfair of Bob to bring that up. It wasn't a shovel, it was a broom and he didn't beat the dog. Steve was cleaning up the dog's mess and it bit him. When he mentioned it on the air he might have embellished the story a bit. Then that talking tampon Kathy O'Malley, who was writing the Inc. Column at the time got all up in arms about it. |
| 8:41
| Next thing Steve knows the state is at his house investigating him. The guy they sent really wanted to take Steve's dog away but he couldn't see any signs of abuse. Steve really let that dog have it after the guy from the state left though. |
| 8:42
| Just so Bob knows, that's not really an idea he had. An idea is something to improve the show, not just a way for Bob to get laid by some girl at the Canine Rescue that he's hot for. It didn't warrant wasting the production staff's time. |
| 8:50
| Live read: McCracken Financial |
| 8:51
| OK, back to Bob and Ron. We're done talking about the moon and dogs right? Steve was looking at his email and someone said that the moon looks bigger at the horizon because you have something to compare it to like buildings or trees. |
| 8:52
| If Bob would have told Buzz that he would have disagreed with him and tried to prove him wrong. Bob did say that and Buzz disagreed with him. |
| 8:53
| OK, on to some rock history. Steve has changed Bob and Ron's song for today. It's the same song just a different version and they know what he's talking about. |
| 8:54
| Today we wish Paul McCartney a happy birthday, he was born in 1942. Steve can't do the math that quickly, how old is he? Buzz says he's 65 and now eligible to retire. Buzz is your go to Paul McCartney and astronomy expert. |
| 8:55
| It's also Brian Wilson's birthday this week which also ushers in the coming of summer. Steve needs to make a quick phone call to Adam. |
| 8:56
| Steve is smelling food, is Adam eating one of his big omelets? It's not Adam but he'll go find out who it is and throw it out. Steve's smelling delicious food and he shouldn't be smelling it unless we're getting some. A lot of the time Adam gets a delicious omelet and we can smell it. |
| 8:57
| Is it someone from Fresh FM? Every time we have food Steve makes sure to share it with that AJ kid. He better not be withholding delicious food from Steve. |
| 8:58
| AJ had some fries which quite frankly he doesn't need. Although Steve did share a lot of his Cinnabons with AJ which caused him to go up about 10 pant sizes. |
| 8:59
| The Monterrey Pop Festival started 41 years ago on Monday. Weren't Bob and Ron going to congratulate Steve on something? They were going to wait until after the song. |
| 9:00
| Caller Bob has a correction to make. Paul McCartney was born in 1942 which means he's 66. Ron thought Bob said that. Steve's shutting down the whole Paul McCartney age thing, he doesn't acre. |
| 9:01
| Jimi Hendrix, The Who, The Mamas and the Papas and Otis Redding all performed at Monterrey. This song is the best version of this song ever. And Otis died not shortly after the concert. |
| 9:02
| Song: Try a Little Tenderness, Otis Redding |
| 9:07
| That's your Otis Redding right there from Monterrey Pop which was 41 years ago. Steve was playing bass on that song when he was 13, no wonder Black Creek picked him up. |
| 9:08
| Otis Redding died 6 months later along with his manager and 6 members of the Barkays in a plane crash. The last time Ron was at the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame he actually saw a piece of the plane. Is that a joke? |
| 9:09
| Alright let's finish up this moon thing. It's from the BBC so it must be true. The first theory is known as the Ponzo Illusion. This is where Bob and Ron make a Bonzo Dog Band joke. |
| 9:10
| Ponzo drew two identical bars across a picture of railway tracks which converge as they recede into the distance. The upper bar looks wider because it appears to span the rails while the lower bar sits between the rails. |
| 9:11
| Skeptics of this theory, like Buzz, point to airline pilots who also see the illusion and have no ground reference points. |
| 9:12
| Bob and Ron wanted to congratulate Steve for being in Mojo Magazine, there's an entire page about Disco Demolition. Paul Natkin is quote throughout but Steve didn't do an interview with anyone. Paul was there, he knows what he's talking about. |
| 9:20
| On CNN Ed Lavendera was reporting on the flood damage, standing in front of a huge vinyl collection on someone's front lawn. Get some news! This is on the main CNN line?! |
| 9:21
| The record collection consisted of Elvis, Andy Gibb and Willie Nelson. Take out the white trash! If that's your record collection you have to go. |
| 9:22
| That Don Lemon really brings them down because he's a Chatty Kathy. Show some flooding, show some sandbags and say there's nothing you can do about it. |
| 9:23
| One woman yesterday said she was leaving her house for the third and final time after 30 years of being there. You have to have respect for the river, that's what you said. |
| 9:24
| Steve gets why people build farms near water but you can't build your house there. Look at the history of Mississippi and try to build just beyond where the water usually gets to. |
| 9:25
| That one place in Wisconsin where the lake flooded and then disappeared, they canceled their federal flood insurance a few years ago. What could go wrong they probably thought. |
| 9:26
| Alright Chef Hans is here but without the guten tag greeting. Is the Swiss out now? The Swiss are out of the Euro Cup but Hans did not miss last Thursday to watch the match. |
| 9:27
| Hans was stressed out on Thursday and couldn't sleep the night before. He took some Unisom and the next day he was like a zombie. A sombie? Reports of Hans' death were greatly exaggerated. |
| 9:28
| Buzz knows what Hans is talking about with those sleeping pills though but they did recently rearrange the chemical make-up of some of those pills. |
| 9:29
| Hans' dishwasher was out on Wednesday and that was a machine, not a person. Steve would be happy to wash dishes for Hans if someone doesn't show up. |
| 9:30
| Tom Thayer was in at the restaurant over the weekend with a beautiful lady. That's probably all we need to say, we all know how Tom rolls. Rick Sutcliffe, the Red Baron was also in. |
| 9:31
| Sutcliffe got a little emotional because he was going in for surgery the next day. He was there with the entire ESPN crew that he calls games with. |
| 9:32
| Sutcliffe is a class act though. Hans remembers going with him to Cabrini Green to hand out turkeys around Thanksgiving one year. |
| 9:33
| That's the difference between Chef Hans and Steve. Hans hands out turkeys with Rick Sutcliffe, Steve goes to Tijuana with him to watch a donkey show. |
| 9:34
| On Monday they had a party for Pat Foley at the restaurant. John McDonough and Dale Tallon were also there. Hans wanted to call Steve but it was already 6:30 so he thought he'd say no. |
| 9:35
| Steve would have probably come down for Pat Foley and Dale Tallon. Steve's name came up several times in a big way, he was mentioned as part of the new wave of interest in the Hawks. |
| 9:36
| Steve's taking almost all the credit for it, along with Toews and Kane of course. Steve knew that Rocky knew what he was doing. |
| 9:37
| So Hans is back on track right? But he lost sleep because the dishwasher was broken? There was some other stuff going on as well that Hans doesn't want to talk about. Is he sure? Because Steve and Buzz are great problem solvers, since they get into enough problems of there own. |
| 9:38
| Hans did want to say that Buzz did a great job when he came over to learn how to make the rosemary chicken. Steve once came there to make Rosemary Clooney, before her untimely death. |
| 9:39
| Buzz also got an up-close look at the inner workings of the kitchen. There's a lot going on in there. Buzz got to see Hans take someone to task, he was cutting the meat for the burgers. Did he go all Gordon Ramsay on the guy? |
| 9:40
| Hans did reach into the garbage can at one point and pull out a bunch of discarded meat that was perfectly suitable to use. That's what Gordon Ramsay does all the time. |
| 9:41
| Hans has heard rumors that there's going to be an Escoffier dinner in Monaco in 2010. So it's off to France then? Monaco is it's own country right? |
| 9:42
| Monaco is a principality, like how Switzerland has Liechtenstein. Steve knows that Buzz wants to say "Liechtenstein.? Don't even know her!" |
| 9:43
| Steve can't just take off and go to Monaco This is why they're announcing it in advance, they'll be taking a charter. So Steve's supposed to go along this sausage fest with dudes wearing sashes? |
| 9:50
| Steve likes to think that Pat Foley was giving a shoutout to Buzz yesterday. We can probably go back and look this up but Steve said that the Hawks should rehire Pat Foley. We can have Jim look it up. |
| 9:51
| News with Buzz |
| 9:52
| President Bush will ask Congress to reopen offshore drilling on the Continental Shelf. And what a coincidence, John McCain agrees with him! |
| 9:53
| A spokesperson for Al Gore is disputing reports that the Vice President used 10% more electricity in his home this year than he did last year. No one took into account the addition to Gore's house which used up more electricity |
| 9:54
| A Vermont teenager is in trouble after telling state police officers that she didn't see them trying to pull her over, while doing 104 mph, because she was talking on her cellphone. 104, is that what Mary was doing? |
| 9:55
| An incident in Haditha, Iraq that Time referred to as a massacre has all but been put to rest. A judge in California dismissed all charges against Lieutenant Colonel Jeffrey Chisani. He was the highest ranking military official charged in the deaths of 24 civilians. |
| 9:56
| Britney Spears is back in court facing charges of driving without a license. They don't have any limos in LA any more? |
| 9:57
| A tour plane that disappeared over the Big Island of Hawaii is still missing. Search teams are out looking for it now. That'll put a crimp in your vacation. |
| 9:58
| A 1954 Picasso sold for $6 million at an auction in Australia. Sydney is the New York of the art market in the Southern Hemisphere. |
| 9:59
| From the show log for November 20th, 2007, which is also Steve's birthday if anyone is keeping score, Steve said that if he were John McDonough he'd bring back Pat Foley and pair him up with Eddie Olczyk. Where's Steve's money? |
| 10:00
| It's not that much of a stretch to do that but still, Steve said it on November 20th. And that's exactly what John did, Pat will be on TV with Eddie. |
