August 31, 2005
Okay, so maybe now I feel a little guilty that I wanted to see New Orleans completely covered in water. You have to admit, though, that  the helicopter rescues and the looting make for some interesting TV. I guess I understand the looting for food and water. If I were flooded out of my home, I think I would crave a 32-ounce bottle of Dasani water and a can of SpaghettiOs myself. But trying on clothes while standing knee deep in floodwater? That seems a bit much. I’m still waiting on the floating corpses.
To that end, I have sent away for 5 pounds of Chocolate Babies to act as “floaters” in the new drink I’ll be inventing this week: The Floating Corpse. I’m not sure what it will have in it, and this will be the first time I’ve ever invented a cocktail that I can’t taste test, but I’m sure I can find a willing bunch of alcohol guzzling guinea pigs at work. Hell, I have an actual guinea pig at home in my kitchen, but Janet has befriended it, and I don’t think she wants me corrupting it. It’s Matt Dahl’s guinea pig that he abandoned in our garage when we made him move back home because he got bad grades at DePaul. Of  course, we were only punishing the guinea pig and ourselves.
For The Floating Corpse, I’m thinking Crème de Cacao, Kahlua, some rum, maybe a little cream and a floating Chocolate Baby. Of course, I’ll fine tune that and come up with a “secret ingredient” or two, but that’s the general cocktail framework that I’m thinking of presently. Sort of a Mudslide, without the mud. More of a Muddy Waters. Also, just for the record, the chocolate baby thing is not meant to be racist in any way. Yes, there have been a lot of African Americans on TV being rescued and the like, but they don’t make anything other than Chocolate Babies or Licorice Babies, and It seemed to me that chocolate was less offensive. It’s a judgment call. If they made Strawberry Babies, I would have ordered five pounds of them too.
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